things to that goat!
Part VI
Posting Guru
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 1,437
Likes: 3
I've reached a point where I have to re-apply my focus on my home and family much more intentionally than I have been for the past couple of years. My family is not yet at a true crisis point, but I have to "stop the bleeding" so-to-speak before it gets there, and it is simply going to consume a lot more of my time than I've been giving.
I will continue monitoring my PM's and will continue making covers, but not much more than that.
I'm going to miss the fellowship we have here, but my family comes first, and I've simply let that true focus slip too much from where it needs to be on a practical daily basis... It's been sort of like trying to hit a target you're shooting at with BOTH eyes open... you just can't guarantee dead center shots without the proper focus!
__________________
I will continue monitoring my PM's and will continue making covers, but not much more than that.
I'm going to miss the fellowship we have here, but my family comes first, and I've simply let that true focus slip too much from where it needs to be on a practical daily basis... It's been sort of like trying to hit a target you're shooting at with BOTH eyes open... you just can't guarantee dead center shots without the proper focus!
__________________
Hotshot
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 13,144
Likes: 11
From: Rochdale MA
Zinger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Smokin
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 8,849
Likes: 0
I've reached a point where I have to re-apply my focus on my home and family much more intentionally than I have been for the past couple of years. My family is not yet at a true crisis point, but I have to "stop the bleeding" so-to-speak before it gets there, and it is simply going to consume a lot more of my time than I've been giving.
I will continue monitoring my PM's and will continue making covers, but not much more than that.
I'm going to miss the fellowship we have here, but my family comes first, and I've simply let that true focus slip too much from where it needs to be on a practical daily basis... It's been sort of like trying to hit a target you're shooting at with BOTH eyes open... you just can't guarantee dead center shots without the proper focus!
__________________
I will continue monitoring my PM's and will continue making covers, but not much more than that.
I'm going to miss the fellowship we have here, but my family comes first, and I've simply let that true focus slip too much from where it needs to be on a practical daily basis... It's been sort of like trying to hit a target you're shooting at with BOTH eyes open... you just can't guarantee dead center shots without the proper focus!
__________________
Hi John. Extra scary avatar you got there.
Super Moderator
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 24,308
Likes: 42
From: SW Virginia
Hey Lisa! That's the ex's mom.
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Post Fiend
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 5,398
Likes: 1
From: Gilbert, Az
I think this joke applys to Caleb!!
An English ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman
'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Englishman.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
Welshman: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'
Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Welshman: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f * cking liar…'
An English ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman
'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Englishman.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
Welshman: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'
Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Welshman: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f * cking liar…'
FTE Leadership Emeritus
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 111,873
Likes: 153
From: Wharton, NJ
I think this joke applys to Caleb!!
An English ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman
'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Englishman.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
Welshman: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'
Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Welshman: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f * cking liar…'
An English ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman
'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Englishman.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
Welshman: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'
Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Welshman: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f * cking liar…'
Super Moderator
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 24,308
Likes: 42
From: SW Virginia
I think this joke applys to Caleb!!
An English ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman
'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Englishman.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
Welshman: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'
Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Welshman: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f * cking liar…'
An English ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman
'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'
Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Englishman.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'
Welshman: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'
Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'
Welshman: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'
Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f * cking liar…'
If you only knew how many people around here this could apply to!!!
Smokin
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 8,849
Likes: 0
A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the grass when they are pregnant. The Man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means
he has to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day serving the sheep and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look
out and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of
them's honking the horn."
he has to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day serving the sheep and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look
out and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of
them's honking the horn."
Post Fiend
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 5,398
Likes: 1
From: Gilbert, Az
I have learned that I can't drink anything when I read the OT just for that reason!
That is just wrong, sick and wrong
A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the grass when they are pregnant. The Man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means
he has to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day serving the sheep and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look
out and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of
them's honking the horn."
he has to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day serving the sheep and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look
out and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of
them's honking the horn."