The accepted interpretation is for those people who disagree!

 

I am a programmer and I design games that you will use your 5G's to play.
Once I have it online, I wait and wonder what game I can program next.
So, I programmed a pirate game, but users said, the main character looks
Unlike any character I have ever seen! It's not like a pirate I have ever seen!
There will be a patch soon.

 

 

“You were a great golfer, but before you meet God, I thought I should tell you that
other than your great golf career, you really didn’t do anything for the common
good or for the bad, so we’re not sure what to do with you,” I pondered for a bit and said,
“Once after playing a golf tournament in California, I was driving back to the hotel and there
in the parking lot, I saw a young woman being tormented by a group of Hell’s Angels —
you know, revving their engines, circling her and taunting her with obscenities.” So,
I got out with my 5 iron and told the Leader to stop it.
“Wow, that’s very impressive,” St. Peter replied. “When did this happen?”
“About two minutes ago,” I said.

 

 

I ran out of clean socks so I piled them on a tray, grabbed the detergent and headed to the laundromat down the block, a steep hill.

As I was walking down the hill I slipped and fell and the dirty socks went flying and the detergent went flying and there I was, sitting on the sock by the tray, watching the Tide roll away.

 

Lil Johnny now an Elderly shuffle slowly into the 'Orange Dipper',
an ice cream parlor in New Orleans and pulls himself slowly,
painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he orders a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"
"No," Lil Johnny says,, "hemorrhoids"

 

 

Young Woman with lots of Tattoos seems.
Well, sorta;; like Hippies and Bell Bottom pants of the 70's

 

A Person in Kentucky is asked,
"Whats the best Whisky, Bill? So your response,
"It's the elixir of Christmas cheer, the shield
against winter chill:& a taxable potion.
"It puts needed funds into public coffers to
comfort little crippled children, care for
our vets and fund the National quests."
Here let me pour you another shot.
"Have you changed you mind now?"

 

“Oil Change instructions for Women:
1. Pull up to Dealership when the mileage reaches 5,000 miles since the last oil change.
2. Relax in the waiting room while enjoying a cup of coffee.
3. 15 minutes later, scan debit card and leave, driving a properly maintained vehicle.
Money spent:
Oil Change: $24.00
Coffee: Complementary
TOTAL: $24.00


Oil Change instructions for Men:
1. Wait until Saturday, drive to auto parts store and buy a case of oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree, and use your debit card for $50.00.
2. Stop to buy a case of beer, (debit $24), drive home.
3. Open a beer and drink it.
4. Jack truck up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5. Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6.. In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7. Place drain pan under engine.
8. Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9. Give up and use crescent wrench.
10. Unscrew drain plug.
11. Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil: splash hot oil on you in process. Cuss.
12. Crawl out from under truck to wipe hot oil off of face and arms. Throw kitty litter on spilled oil.
13. Have another beer while watching oil drain.
14. Spend 30 minutes looking for oil filter wrench.
15. Give up; crawl under truck and hammer a screwdriver through oil filter and twist off.
16. Crawl out from under truck with dripping oil filter splashing oil everywhere from holes. Cleverly hide old oil filter among trash in trash can to avoid environmental penalties. Drink a beer.
17. Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat of oil to gasket surface.
18. Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
19. Remember drain plug from step 11.
20. Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
21. Drink beer.
22. Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor. Throw kitty litter on oil spill.
23. Get drain plug back in with only a minor spill. Drink beer.
24. Crawl under truck getting kitty litter into eyes. Wipe eyes with oily rag used to clean drain plug. Slip with stupid crescent wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame removing any excess skin between knuckles and frame.
25. Begin cussing fit.
26. Throw stupid crescent wrench.
27. Cuss for additional 5 minutes because wrench hit truck and left dent.
28. Beer.
29. Clean up hands and bandage as required to stop blood flow.
30. Beer.
31. Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.
32. Beer.
33. Lower truck from jack stands.
34. Move truck back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during any missed steps.
35. Beer.
36. Test drive truck.
37. Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence.
38. Truck gets impounded.
39. Call loving wife, make bail.
40. 12 hours later, get truck from the impound yard.
Money spent:
Parts: $50.00
DUI: $2,500.00
Impound fee: $75.00
Bail: $1,500.00
Beer: $20.00
TOTAL: $4,145.00
But you know the job was done right!”

 

The Lil Woman had a maintenance contract as part of the extended warrantee,
with the Bowtie Stealership. After an Oil Change I checked the oil level before
we left to go on Vacation. It was a QT. low. Filled it and from then on,
she checked the oil before leaving the Stealership.

 

U were there that day?