Border3899, what can I say that hasn't already been said, Good Luck and may you be happy forever.


AND DENNIS don't be bashing us "10's"

 

I would advise you to get a restraining order, you are seriously afraid of this guy, and if he does hurt you, or continues to harass you, the restraining order will make it that much easier to catch him.

Mom always told me to follow my heart, I suggest you do the same.

 

sinister73-

I did not leave him because of his "psychotic" ways. I left him two months ago because he did not appreciate me, he took me for granted in many different ways, he would not communicate with me regarding anything. The list goes on, those are just a few of the reasons. So I left and we agree'd that we would try to date and not live together so to speak to see if we could get back the love we once had. He then decided that he is not able to date someone who doesnt live with him. So he started making threats about burning my belongings and such. To which i reacted adn went and got what i thought was all of my stuff a week and a half ago. I have several emails from him, one he's very nice and claims to want to work things out, the next he is yelling and swearing and making more threats. the next he is asking if we are through. He is up and down and all over the place. He then informed me that i forgot a couple of things so i went last night to get them. Only to have him then start saying the things he shoudl have said long ago when he had the opportunity.

He knows the reasons i left he made no attempt to work on saving our relationship until it was too late, last night. We got together on several occasions to discuss why things went bad and what we should do, and not one time when we were together would he talk about our relationship or our problems. Relationships are about communication something of which he would not do...

To answer your other question my friend who pointed that out was a female not a male who wants to date me. And i did not leave him for another man, nor have i ever cheated on him.

Yes i do still love him you are correct there, however, there is no reason for me to have to stay with someone who is on a roller coaster who will be nice to me one day and mean the next. The last two weeks i saw a side of him that was very scary to me which is why i will not go back to him even though now he wants to try to salvage this.

 

ask yourself this.. Have I ever been afraid of him??? my girlfriend and i have been together almost three years and i asked her i if i have ever scared her... she said once, she ran into her ex at shop-rite and he hit her in the parking lot... she came home with a black eye... we left the house and I proceeded to beat the living daylights out of him, I told him that if he touches her again that I'd kill him. I was totally serious.... the person that you love should also be your best friend IMO....

 

Your reasons for leaving still seem vague to me, I still don't know what you mean by "being taken for granted" or what your version of being unappreciated is, but I'll respect your privacy to you reasons.
It's just that to some girls, a guy is taking her for granted if he's not able to be with her all the time and still be at work 60 hours a week. And some of them feel unappreciated if they arent taken out to fancy restaurants every other day.

All that matters is that you are being honest with yourself- as long as you know you are truthful and unbiased, then you will know for yourself that what you are doing is right.

I'm sorry I assumed your friend was male-but the way I took it, your friend was there for your safety and to make him think twice about hurting you-I guess it's somewhat chauvinistic of me to have assumed that your friend was a guy.

I'm glad for you that you hav'ent made the mistake of infidelity-and that is what it is, even if he's just your boyfriend.

I've seen lots of it, mostly to male friends of mine-and I've had to deal with it myself aswell, but most recently it happened to a female friend of mine - her boyfriend of 4 years dumped her on Christmas day -right in front of his whole family, and just before dinner. He let her spend 900.00 in gifts for his family too- that's almost 3 weeks earnings for her. Turned out he was seeing an old GF of his from some time ago, it never ceases to amaze me, how much of this goes on all the time.

To me this guy is dirt-and if your ex is anything like him -it's in your best interests to move on. If he really does not appreciate you or care enough to ever make you feel special-as long as your version is reasonable, then I'm sorry you've had to go through that.
If you really are scared of him, and want it to be over, all I can say is this, do not under any circumstances allow your feeling for him get the best of you- stay as far away as possible and have absolutely NO contact. It will be best for you both that way.
I hope you do find someone to make you happy, as you seem like a really nice girl, but heed my advice- this is what you need to do.

It would bother me to no end, if harm were to come to you over this-be smart, jilted lovers don't think rationally-don't compromise your position, and don't allow him to compromise it.

Good luck to you miss, I hope all turns out well.

 

I agree with everyone too you did the right thing! Its not worth it to be in a abusive relationship be it man or woman.

FWIW i have found that after three failed marriages that being alone is much better. I'm raising two daughters by myself and that takes up most of my time. Yes love stinks!

 

Hi Border, the only reason I'm replying to this is because you say you are afraid he will hurt you. Not quite sure how you mean this so I'll tell you what happened to a friend. She had gotten a divorse and was moving on with her life but her ex was not letting her go. She had made many police reports and had a restraining order and such. Well he came by her house while she and her boy friend were playing volley ball in the front yard. He pulled a shot gun out and murdered both of them. There are a lot of sick people in this world and some times they cross that line. So if you feel that this guy might hurt you STAY AWAY FROM HIM. When you are saying he turns "psychotic" it made me think of this friend. So be careful and move on.

 

i gave up on trying to get a girl a long time ago. just not the right kind of guy.

 

At least your truck doesn't B&M all the time.

 

I have never abused this girl. I love her. Never raised a hand, ever. Guys, I got left. Her stuff stayed, I hoped. I'm being honest. Border3899 if you are listening, I want to marry you. My Mom moved in temp. I know it sucked. I had no say in the matter.... I home-stead a place she owns, and she was building a new house. Me and Gorder lived here (on a lake, even though it is the size of a school house) for not 1$ except for living exspense. Call me a Mommies boy, but I take care of the my family, and my family has always taken care of me. Old school west virginian boy I guess, but I was raised with manners and respect for family (hove U seen how the afgans and iraq's live). It was tuff though, I hoped my wife to be would be able to weather the hard times (not very hard... 3 months), and savor the good. Yes, my mom does have a large estate, and yes I would do anything for her.... And before I get termed as a mommy's boy, I did set her straight when she over stepped her bounds during that 3 months, but oh... how hard it was dealing with two wemon in a small house working overtime trying to put together enough dough to marry the only gal I have ever wanted to settle down with for the rest of my life. And fix her always broken ford ;-) If I know her at all (she's been living with her mom), she would never deny her mother, although I would have a much easier time living with my "mother n' law to be" than my own. Two cents from a guy that has not had a chance to give his view......

 

I think you are about four long months too late on this deal...

 

You did the right thing and I am glad to see a woman who sticks up for their best interest. I see way too many girls w/ crummy guys who deserve better and don't go out and find something better. Unfortunately,

This thread is over now.

 

We'll four months late and a dollar short ;-) This is a follow up to a closed post.I see the thread got closed, but there were a awful lot of opinions about a guy that never got a word in.

was pretty right on when he brought up, you left him for 2 months, and jsut got your stuff two weeks ago. For two months I had here car, and lot's of stuff being stored in my garage, at my mom's, in my cloeset's, etc. I got mixed signals. One day she was coming back, the next she wasn't, the next she did not know. The psycotic message was, "if you are not going to live here, come and get your stuff. If you don't, what good will does not want, will get burned in the fire pit. What will not burn, is going to the dump.". unqoute. I thought that was pretty clear, after you leave, don't pay any of the "closing bills", and leave all of your stuff and a guy wondering if you are ever coming back. My two cents.

 

in before thread lock.
EDIT: Comedy 'I thought this thread was going to be about a black marker ' response.
*counts blessings I've never been with anybody that did weird/bad stuff like that before*