"insecurity problems" will probably not go away so be prepared to live with them if you go forward with this girl. I found that girls (women) are a lot like busses .... if you miss one, another comes along soon.

 

but not all busses, like women, are dependable or the right one to be on board with

 

There is one more thing I did forget to add.....from experience (expressed by myself and my sweetheart) the accuser/doubter is usually the one doing wrong.......NOT saying she is, but MAYBE she is having 'thoughts' and she feels guilty and is trying to justify her infidelities of the heart??

I hope this is not the case, but it is something to consider......

again, GOOD LUCK and I WISH YOU THE BEST OF HAPPINESS

 

Excellent point, My Precious!!! Ha! Ha!! Ha!!! I have found this to be very true indeed!!!

 

Oh, now I am YOUR Precious......hmmmmmmmmmm?

 

Haha, I really dont think she is doing anything bad. The way I think about it now, if she is, then she is and there is nothing I can do about it, and eventually, I will find out and will deal with it. Until then, I am not going to stress myself out over something that there is no proof of. I also really just trust her too.

Anyways, I really appreciate everyone's advice. Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to this thread, been busy lately.

Unfortunately, I cannot call her everyday, sometimes once a week, sometimes 3 days in a row. Just depends. But we did alot of talking, and I ended up just telling her that I cannot marry someone who does not trust me. She got mad and we argued a little and we just got off the phone. After some time of her cooling off, I called her back the next day and we talked it out. She got advice from her mom and my mom, and a good friend of hers. We discussed it, and talked it out, and came to an understanding.

Came down to her being stressed out, scared of losing me, and not knowing how to deal with it. She said it brings out the worst in her and she knows it. On my end, I am going to change the way I speak to her, because unknowingly to me, my attitude had changed towards her since coming here. We are both going to work on this and make it work. Shes a good woman, and I know she has it in her to show trust.

I've appreciated the advice and input from you guys.

Dylan

 

went thru same thing in 67. back then only letters tho. good ol dear john letter. when i returned home we got married. she was scared and insecure. talk it out it will be ok in the end.
thanks for being there

 

you need to understand im my experiences,if u think another females is attractive,u r a worthless pos,but its ok if they like someone

 

Dylan,

That is great news, she sounds like a keeper. I hope it works out and I am sure it will :-)

 

She has the problem, not you and YOU can't fix it. Doesn't sound like there is much trust there. Come home safely and move on with your life. 50% of all marriages wind up in the toilet and they all were in " LOVE " .

 

If you think you need counseling before marriage, just wait. Marriage isn't easy in perfect conditions. Take some time if you need it, big life changing decision not to be jumped into. It will effect not only this marriage, but all your future marriages as well

 

I have been eating the same soup for 32 years. A guy killed his wife and got 20 years. I'm still serving time

 

Well, seeing how the op was about 6 years ago, it's a little late to tell him not to jump into it...

I married someone similar to what the op described, it didn't end well... I always found it funny that she was always suspicious of me because I'm the farthest thing from a ladies man, i was surprised I got a hot woman to marry me...

Tim

 

mehhh. she only married you for your superduty pickup.

 

Thankfully for most of us men women in our lives tend to view us far differently than we see ourselves. Even the most beautiful or gorgeous among the gender have doubts they're attractive, at least to the men they want in their lives.

I've been fortunate to have married two beautiful women, far above my market value based on looks alone. End of the day-----or more accuately first thing in the morning---women are much more similar than we might ever imagine.