We service battery-powered equipment at work. We advise our customers to top off the batteries with distilled water. At least three different customers have approached me with batteries that show signs of using tap water in them. When I ask them if they use distilled water in the batteries they show me a bucket or jug. They proceed to tell me how they fill it with water and leave it sit for a week or so very "still" before they put it in.

 

My favorite is on the Dr. Pepper bottles, "CAUTION- Contents under pressure. Handle with care."

 

By stealing it from the place it was being used for the intended purpose.

 

Ah the old property of "whatever" milk company. I have six crates from a store that closed and the milk company left them there. When they cleaned out the building and put them at the dumpster, I collected them. The dumpster was picked up and as it was full, the truck driver certainly wasn't getting out and getting any to trash. A few more disappeared as people grabbed some here and there, but when the store opened as another convienence store a year latter, they put what was left back in use. Local law at least, once it's in the trash at the curb, or you have the owners permission it's fair game. I'd like to know how much more milk is because they throw away money like that.

 

I'm sure the cost of X amount of lost or stolen milk crates is figured in as the cost of doing business whether they are or not. I'm sure if the milk companies were that concerned they'd have a better plan in place for their return. It's better and cheaper for them to have you make up the losses at the check out then to send out the milk crate police.

 

I like the ones on many frozen food cartons. Please romove carton before heating.

All these awarning labels are the result of a lawsuit at sometime. You ever count all the labels on a ladder?

 

That logic is horribly flawed. Most stupid people start breeding at the ripe old age of 14. What we need to do is abolish all safety laws. If it weren't for these silly laws the average American would be much smarter. With no safety regs the stupid people will terminate themselves in a short time before they have the opportunity to contaminate the gene pool with their idiocy.

 

Then I would have NO friends...

 

My point is they were too lazy to make two trips or call for a bigger truck, so we end up paying for it.

 

Sam Elliot said it best in the movie ROAD HOUSE

"We had to put a sign in the restroom that said:


DO NOT EAT THE BIG WHITE MINTS"


(urinal cakes/pills)

 

What I love as a horse breeder is that when we ship cooled semen, we have ballast bags that we have to put in when shipping only one dose of semen (to keep the cooling rate in the container right, since they're set up to hold two doses) but every container has a warning label about how these ballast bags (containing a liquid dyed dark blue) are NOT to be used to inseminate a mare! Personally, if someone is stupid enough to cut open a ballast bag and put this dark blue liquid into their mare, I don't really want to be shipping them semen in the first place. I can't think of anything I'd want to put into a horse's uterus that's dark blue!

 

Easy... Rob a bank, and use a milk crate to carry the money, the cops will arrest you for the robbery, and the milk crate for being an accessory. Hope the two of you get along, though, you'll be spending a long time in jail while all the lawsuits for people that stuck screwdrivers in their eye, ate dessicant, suffocated on plastic bags, inseminated their horses with blue goo, fell off ladders, rolled their SUV's ("But, your honor, I though it'd be safe to take that particular on-ramp at 105!"), stuck eggplants in their ears, and failed to remove the carton from their frozen entrees have their time in court...

 

Jim Morrison pegged it - "People are strange..."

If I tell a group of people "DO NOT...(something)" -
The odds are in favor of (no matter how complex and specific the DO NOT instructions are) someone in the crowd will do exactly that!

There are several reasons and explanations as to why that is, most have to do with self image, ego, or outright rebellion syndrom ("Tell ME what to do - I'll show YOU! Oh sheesh...")

And it's one of the finer sources of slapstick in the modern age! If I want someone to sabotage themselves, I will outright tell them about something that is bound to mess them up completely - and be sure to tell them not to do it.

It is GUARANTEED to work!!! Bill Cosby was absolutely on TARGET - it's BRAIN DAMAGE!!!

"If I told you not to do it, and you knew not to do that thing... Then WHY did you do that?"

(Response?)

"I DON'T KNOW..."

These are brain damaged individuals! Our society has protected them all, and they are all over the place out there... If you know you can hurt or kill yourself in some way, or be inconvenienced somehow, you knew this to begin with - without ANYONE telling you about it; why is it that all it takes is to hear the words "NO! Don't do that..." And whatever the action is - it then becomes irresistable? What happened there? What changed?

I wonder what would happen if a plain old hammer was marketed with a sticker saying: "Do not strike yourself on the head with this implement"

Go figure....


~Wolfie

For each and every Fool-Proof system - there exists at least one system-proof FOOL!!!

 

I don't know, but I'm getting some stickers made and planning a trip to Home Depot.

 

Ooooh! Dastardly....

I like it!

~Wolf