I never got into my personal life on here because well, it's personal.

Myself and my ex's marriage fell apart about 2-3 years ago. We're talking the wheels came off quicker than a late model Dodge Durango. We have one kid, 6 year old boy. We tried the "staying together for the kid's sake" but it was blatently obvious. We were in separate rooms, we bickered a lot and all that. We tried church counseling, well I went to counseling, she went for a few minutes then left because the minister told her things she didn't want to hear. Finally between t-giving and Xmas of last year we separated. In January of this year we agreed to get a divorce and she went to a high-flying lawyer who ended up dragging things out. She fired that lawyer a month or so ago and told me she wanted to get it done before the end of the year. I said OK fine, I'm in no hurry.

But she was .. she found herself a new man only 2 months after we agreed to divorce. He moved in with her this past summer. So here she was, still "married" with a live-in boyfriend. Oh well. And no I don't think she was having any on the side while we were still together. She just "recovered" quickly ..

So this past Friday my ex- calls and says the papers were processed and the divorce is final, and she let me have what I wanted, only real property we had were vehicles. She has her 99 Windstar and I have my 98 Taurus. I didn't fight her on custody. I know our child is better off with her because she has a very strong family network near her and he's very attached to his Mom. I'm 500 miles from my family and little in the way of support "network" here. I'll get my copy of the papers in the mail.

I really expected myself to feel all upbeat and happy that it's over. I'm not all that "jubilant" and ready to throw a party to celebrate. But I'm definitely not upset. Just kind of a "neutral" kind of feeling. She seemed happier too. Things just went way wrong and it took 6-7 years of being together to realize we weren't really meant to be together. I'm learning from this and going forward, and don't fall for the first one I meet again just because she happens to express an interest. No timetable on "meeting" anyone, how is that you find something when you least expect it.

 

Sounds like you tried everything , and sounds like you will do all right. You have to look at divorce in a positive aspect that you are freed instead of living in constant tortureous hell. The most important thing is you keep a great relationship with your son no matter of the BS behind or ahead of you. Seems like they are always the pawn in divorce. Every time I get into another realtionship they seem to get better than the previous ones, I guess with age comes the knowledge of knowing what you what instead of what you think you want. My hats off to any person that gets it right the first time. TIme heals all wounds and mistakes that we make in our lives. You already sound like you are headed in the correct direction - good luck.

 

I know it! My maternal grandparents were both married, and both as far as anyone knew, the first relationship for both. They were married for 55 years until cancer claimed grandma's life. My stepmom's parents are on 50 years and still going strong, and odd thing was they were married in their car by a Justice of the Peace, on the side of the road!! How funny is that! [this was in 1945 in Florence, Alabama. not modern Las Vegas where you'd expect such a thing]

My mom and dad were only together for about 7 years. Myself and my ex- only went 8 [technically 9] years.

 

Well I'm sorry to hear you have become another one of the growing "statistics", but it sounds like you did what you could to make it work. Unfortunately as with the case of all divorces where children are involved, it's the kids who suffer the most in a divorce. But as you said there is a strong family network so hopefully things will work out for the best for all involved.

Best of luck to you and I hope all of you get past this and go one to lead happy lives.