You can't make this stuff up. At least I can't...

So this morning I go outside for my morning run and I notice my 16 year old son left the lights on in my in-laws' 1985, one owner, F250 diesel (we've borrowed it for a bit while my oldest is home from college). So before I left I went back inside, woke up my son, told him to go turn off the lights and see if the truck would still start.

"If not, jump it. We are gonna need it today."

An hour later I came back to find my Tacoma parked next to the Ford, both hoods open, jumper cables laying aside, and my confused looking son hammering a metal fence post into the ground. Can you see what's coming?!

"What the heck are you doing?" I asked him.

"Dad, the Ford has 2 batteries and it wouldn't start from your Toyota."

"Ok...so to fix that you're gonna build a fence?"

"No," he said patienly, as if talking to someone who wasn't too sharp. "I looked on the internet about how to jump start a diesel with two batteries. It said the negative cable needed to be connected to the ground."

Oh. My. Gosh. I am a complete failure as a father!

After I finished laughing, it took me a little while to catch my breath, then still more time before I could keep a straight face long enough explain to him what was meant by "connected to ground" as opposed to "THE ground". Eventually we pulled over our Expedition, connected it to the other battery and the F250 fired right up. Success!!


Epilogue: 20 minutes later...

I went outside again and my son had dutifully reparked all the cars and put away the jumper cables. Unfortunately he had also turned off the F250 after only a couple minutes of charging. Needless to say, it still wouldn't start.

"Christian, go back outside and do the whole process over. Then let the F250 run for about half an hour to recharge!"

"Oh. Ok. Sorry dad."

I went back inside and as the door was closing I heard him yell from the drive way, "Hey dad, can you go get me the fence post?!"

True story.

 

LOL, be thankful he at least looked up the proper procedure. I have three sons, all decent mechanics, but it sometimes amazes me the things that pop up like this.

 

All will laugh at this !!! Step son , no mechanical ability what so ever . He had the chance but the computer was more important . So he missed out . He shouldn't even open the hood on a vehicle .Acquired a low mileage Toyota ( he paid for it ) from my best friend after his Mom died .He had a flat tire . He attempts to change it in the drive way . The car did have an owners manual .So why read that !! He is 16 & knows all .Puts the small screw jack under the car and starts jacking . OOPs the jack is only under the floor pan . Result - hole in floor . Take off the lug nuts . Now wouldn't you think after twisting one off & breaking the stud you would maybe try turning it the other way ? NOOOO break off another one !!! So now he decides to repair the 2 broken studs . How ? I have no idea !! I said " Take it to a garage because you are not going to be able to fix it . Oh I could have taken off the hub ( it was on the RF ) & impacted the broken studs out & replaced but some times one needs to learn the hard way .So he gets this done .Now he has a small hole in the pass floor pan . A hole was visible under the carpet . Now he decides that this is something he can fix .Purchases some bondo at the local autozone , comes home , opens the can and spreads it on from under neath . Did all read what I just said ? Opened the can and spread it on . I laughed my *** off . I said to him " What do you think that little tube of hardner is for ? "Do you think the can of Bondo comes with the hardner because they had some left over ? "I told him to scrape it all off because the bondo will never dry in 100 yr s.In the process of spreading it on he managed to get it all over the driveway under the car , tried washing the tools with water . What a mess !!!

 

Thanks for the laughs. It's amazing how teenagers know it all.

 

Didn't We ?

 

Since we are talking about embarrassing teen things. This one especially hurts because I'm from Texas. We decide it's time to take a vacation but we don't want to go far so we head to a dude ranch in Bandera, TX outside San Antonio. We are from a much larger city but it's still Texas. It's time for the morning trail ride out along a canyon - my young teenage daughter get's up on the horse jumps on facing the *** end of the horse. I kid you not!

Ben in Austin
1950 F1

 

good laugh for me whilst i sit and wait at the plant for another 2 hours for the 5th day straight ...............................

 

Well I won't mention anything I have done.....but my wife and kids are fair game.
I was running in Florida with my then 16 year old daughter. We are running by a condo that had a sign: 850 ft. Pickens Rd...... She looked over and said: "Is that building really 850 feet tall, it doesn't look that tall."...... My reply: 'Uhmmm....850 fort pickens road...." She has those blond moments....

My son got hit by a pitch and broke his maxilla. They pulled his teeth back in and put a wire brace on it and said he could play if he protected his face. So, we got a fielding mask and a week post injury he was playing. The first game my wife saw, the boys were warming up....the conversation went like this:
Gwen: "What's that boy have on his face?"
Another Mom: "....Your SON??!......"
Gwen: "Oh.....yeah...."
We all about fell out of our chairs.

 

Must admit I did do some very foolish things while a teenager . Growing up in a lumber mill always presented everyday adventures Dad's saw mill was in full operation in early summer . We made railroad ties out out hardwood 9" x 11" x 100 " long solid wood . He had a Ross fork lift truck ( one of the very first implements I ever drove) like the Navy used to take small boats out of the water .Had a huge counter weight hanging on the backend .Dad removed it because it would always get stuck in the mud .It would handle 20 ties at a time 5 across x 4 rows high . No more . Well I thought I could make more time up in the stacking dept if I took 1 more row up the hill to the rail road tie holding area . The ties were stacked 3 high & having an extra row on made lifting them up high a challenge . Almost made the lift but the large fork lift tipped over front wards . Now did I ride it out or did I bail out . It was "I'm outta here . " Dad was pissed . Spilled the ties all over then had to restack by hand lifting . I think that is why my back is done . Mentioned that to Dad many yrs. ago . His responce was .Bulls*it . I used to abuse his trucks severely . Tipped the fork lift over one other time with Dad standing right next to it .

Another incident was in the winter . Not much to do in N. Wis. in mid winter . Would show up late , get the fire going in the large wood burning furnace in the milling/ planing building . Back in the office next door for some warmth & coffee .Now it's around 9:30 .No customers so Dad says " Go out in the planing building & clean up. " As it was never really clean . Always wood shavings , saw dust & etc. on the floor . OK so out I go . The wood burner has gotten it nice & warm in there by now . Cleaning up & spot an empty spray paint can . The light bulb goes off !. some times one just has to find out what will happen when you do some thing they say right on the can NOT to do . Yep I do it . Open the cast iron door & in it goes . Not to soon after that Holy ***** What an explosion . It blew the door off and across the floor it goes . Of course Dad & his brother (uncle who he I did not get along with ) wonder why ? came running from the near by office opened the door just as I am about to pick up the furnace door (of course it was hot ) and both uttered some profanity . Well I couldn't hear them anyway or see them because the blast blew every little piece of dust from the last 20 yrs. into the air .Man did I F-up !!!!

At one time the 1ST-RIDE was the delivery truck for the mill .Right after I purchased it from Grandpa I would drive it around the little town ( 256 people ) with out insurance . So favorite uncle was not too keen on this idea in case of law suit against the Lumber Co.Also at this time Dad & not so favorute uncle had large land clearing equip. TD 18 A dozer ,D-6 Cat . scraper & etc. Uncle says" If I see you or catch you driving that truck around again with out ins. I am going to crush it with the dozer "My responce "I'll burn this F'n place down." That didn't go over well 'The old truck was my life at 16.I was fired many times by Uncle in the morning and rehired at noon by Dad. It was hilarious !!!