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Old Dec 4, 2008 | 06:40 PM
  #1  
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Bill W
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What to do.....

About my Kid! Ok some of you have met my son David, He finished high school Which i am proud of....But for 6+ months he has done NOTHING! I am about at my end with him, He will not find a job, I took him to work with me for a few weeks... and that was enough! So I thought i would ask you guys what i should do?!? I cant go on much longer with out doing somthing. I am BLUE in the Face!

Should i show him the door?

Should I take him behind the wood shed?

I just dont know what to do with him!
 
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Old Dec 4, 2008 | 08:25 PM
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That is a tough one Bill. Is he interested in ANYTHING? Troy's son is like that also, but his mom put the smack down on him and now he has a job at some grocery store. She is also making him pay his own car ins and his cell bill so he has to keep a job to be able to drive and have his phone. Maybe try something like that with him.
 
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Old Dec 4, 2008 | 08:54 PM
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Cris If he could get a job playing video games he would make a fortune! He Sleeps till almost noon every day except the weekend when we are here to get him up,
He does not own or want a car un less it is an automatic and he will not at all drive my old ford trucks. The only reason i own two of them is because one was for him...... I told him to walk to wendys or jack in the box or the car wash and get a job But he just won't do it. Honestly i dont know what to do. But i can say this.... He was not to happy when i told him that he will be switching bedrooms with his sister between christmass and new years, Kristen just smiled when she heard the news. she has always had the small bedroom.
 
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Old Dec 5, 2008 | 07:29 AM
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That would get him out of the house
He won't be until noon.
 
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Old Dec 5, 2008 | 08:12 AM
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the deal at my house is if you ain't getting an education and are sleeping in my house and eating my food you will be paying rent.
 
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Old Dec 5, 2008 | 09:33 AM
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I second what Bart said! The Honeymoon is over, he's out of school, he's an adult (legally) No more freebies! I have worked since I was 14, and was outta the house pronto as soon as I graduated, but I would bounce in and out of mom-n-dad's place inbetween houses. Not once was it Rent free. Kicking him out clean is probably tempting....but it sounds like he's not very prepared for that Bill. Times are tough in the job market right now, but there are always jobs that kids can get. Put his *** to work at home also, making him EARN that free food, and charge Rent to sleep there......that's how it was for me, and I didn't turn out TOO bad
 
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Old Dec 5, 2008 | 11:41 AM
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Since it alerted him when he learned about the bedroom switch, I'd say you're on the right track. I agree with what's been said: if he's going to live at home with you and not work, he needs to start paying rent. Perhaps he could sell his video game console to pay the first month or three?

Tell him that laundry is now $1.00 per wash and $0.50 per dry. That's a better deal than any laundromat.

What kind of things interest him? I know it's a crappy time to be looking for a job. If he doesn't want to work in the food industry, send him to the airport. He might be able to get a job working the line where the bizjets and general aviation airplanes come in.

I miss the days of sleeping 'til noon on my days off...
 
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Old Dec 5, 2008 | 10:43 PM
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I like all of you suggestion's, He does have daily chores.... but only does them after being told 5 times! We have told him he would be paying rent when he finds a job.
maybe thats why he wont do it.

I know I will tell him that if he dosn't find a job by the end of next week. I'll take him to the Recruiters office, maybe that will help motovate him.
 
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Old Dec 6, 2008 | 08:48 PM
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Originally Posted by Bill W
I like all of you suggestion's, He does have daily chores.... but only does them after being told 5 times! We have told him he would be paying rent when he finds a job.
maybe thats why he wont do it.

I know I will tell him that if he dosn't find a job by the end of next week. I'll take him to the Recruiters office, maybe that will help motovate him.
that would motivate me! I think I have always bee too independent to be in the military
 
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Old Dec 6, 2008 | 09:18 PM
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I hate to make Idle threats, and he prolly knows i would not do that

Guess i'll have to seat him down and have HTH talk Again!


Man i can only do this for so long..... I know times are tough, some how some way he'll have to pull his boots up all by himself! his time is Limited here.
 
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Old Dec 8, 2008 | 02:44 PM
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Bill, I don't wish to be in your shoes in this situation. If it were my son (and in about 3 years it will be) I would have to stress to him that there are no free rides. I enlisted in the Army when I was 17 and headed out to Boot Camp soon after I turned 18. Personally, I think the kids of this generation do not have the work ethic that we did and do. I have had some 18 and 19 year olds working for me here at the plant and they just didn't pan out. Mostly because of lack of motivation and thinking they could get everything for nothing. Good luck Bill and let us know how you make out.
 

Last edited by pharm_doc; Dec 8, 2008 at 02:44 PM. Reason: typo
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Old Dec 8, 2008 | 10:30 PM
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Bill,

I'm in agreement with Bart. I always think if someone would of taken care of me, housing, food, etc. What motivation is there to do anything. Think about it. If your parents made you a nest & gave you everything & expected nothing or did nothing to motivate you. You might still be at home yourself. Kids today don't have the motivation we had to do or be something. I have seen this way more than I would of ever thought. You have to either motivate him or live with him doing what he is doing. The choice is yours. It sounds like you have made it TOO NICE for him. Can I come take his place for the winter, Ha Ha. I know what I would do but that is me. I wouldn't put up with it for 5 minutes let alone months.
Just my two cent.
Craig
 
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Old Dec 13, 2008 | 08:46 PM
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Bill

It could be worse.

My son David is 20 going on 21 still dont have a job ( and no brains apparently either) and really does thinks he can scam his way through life.

I refuse to hand him money or even a roof as what i have will be in a pawn shop in a matter of hours. Even when he claims he is starving.

And if they get the idea that it is better on thier own... Well my father told me once.. "when you leave you dont come back except to visit" Advice I well took.....

Garbz
 
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Old Dec 15, 2008 | 10:07 AM
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Hi everybody !! Sorry to hear about your problems with your son. There's only one way to deal with it, its called tough love. He'll hate you for it now, but when he grows up he'll respect you for it. My dad let me live with him and I paid some rent. But I always helped around the house. My oldest daughter(22) didn't like living in our house because of the rules. Me and my wife never backed down on the rules. She moved out and has been on her own ever since. We do help pay for her college, but now that she is married were cuting those strings too. We just beleive you have to make them stand on there own two feet.
I watched a stupid movie this weekend called , "stepbrothers" watch that and you'll toss him out next week. It's about two parents that have a 39 and 40 year old still living at home. That movie will scare the crap out of you.
 
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Old Dec 15, 2008 | 10:49 AM
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Sorry for this hijack Bill............

Hey Patrick, nice to see you on again!!!!!!! Hope all has been well with the family!!!
 
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