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Witch Decision

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Old 09-21-2008, 10:24 PM
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Witch Decision

<hr style="color: rgb(209, 209, 225);" size="1"> <!-- / icon and title --> <!-- message --> Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question?
What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered...is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day.or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

What Lancelot chose is below. BUT....make YOUR choice before you scroll down below. OKAY?











Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now....what is the moral to this story?











The moral is.....

If you don't let a woman have her own way, Things are going to get ugly.
 
  #2  
Old 09-21-2008, 10:52 PM
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oh how true
 
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Old 09-21-2008, 11:09 PM
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Cliff doest speaketh the trueth.
 
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Old 09-21-2008, 11:14 PM
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Originally Posted by UTfball68
Alright I'm taking notes...any of you older guys got anymore tips for a young buck like me. HAHAHA
Yeah DUCK when she throws something
 
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Old 09-22-2008, 01:20 AM
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Good stuff again
 
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Old 09-22-2008, 04:19 AM
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Ok you guys win on this one.
 
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Old 09-22-2008, 11:42 AM
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Originally Posted by SuperSnake
Yeah DUCK when she throws something

any more warnings?


but that was a good story
 
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Old 09-22-2008, 12:51 PM
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Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.
And they lived happily ever after...for a couple of years.

Then her biological clock went off and what she wanted in her life that she was in charge of was children, and Lance undrstood pretty quickly that he'd better get in there and do his duty or things would get ugly.

So he did. But then things got ugly anyway as that promise of always being beautiful seemed to have been forgotten, and she never did take off those 30-lbs from the last pregnancy.

Soon Lance discovered that being in charge of her own life meant being in charge of the household. The level of tidiness of the house had to conform to her standards or things got ugly. The house was decorated to her tastes, or things got ugly. His opinion on raising the kids was seldom sought, but God help him if he didn't do his share of driving kids to activities. His truck rebuilding hobby? - had to go, no time or money for such frivolities.

Being in charge of her life also meant doing whatever she wanted about work and children. Before having the kids, they never talked about how family life would be organized. She just assumed that she'd do whatever she wanted - and what she wanted was to park the kids in daycare asap so she could continue her career, which was totally contrary to what Lance would have wanted for his offspring, but it was "her life" and he had no say, or things would get ugly.

And so it went until the day she announced she was leaving him for her boss, a real man who had some cajones. She's taking "her" children, of course and he'd hear from her lawyer about how much of his income she'd be taking every month for the next 15 years to pay for 'his' kids.

And that's when he realized - he really had married a witch. He had been blinded by the illusion of youthful beauty, and duped by bunch of feminist politically-correct b.s. about her rights and his oppressiveness - but when you stripped away that veneer, she was just the ugly self-absorbed witch he had originally seen. Should'a been more careful and found a nice girl who wasn't so obsessed with having everything her way, and leave the witches to those touchy-feely metrosexual types who're happy being emasculated doormats.
 
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Old 09-22-2008, 03:10 PM
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Something my Late Father told me,,,,,,,
Ray, When it comes to women, there are 2 things you must remember,,,,
#1. NEVER , EVER Argue with your Wife,,,,, You'll never win!
#2. She has the 4 WEAPONS of the Kitchen in "HER" favor,,,, AVOID AT ALL COSTS!

ME????????
Women are like TV SHOWS! (here's the 4 weapons!)

Grannie Clampett = Cast Iron Skillet
Rachel Ray = Butcher Knives
Julia Child = Rolling Pins















Keep Scrolling,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,












If Those shows don't kill you,,,,,,,,,,
The Galloping Gourmet = The Cooking Will!
Don't Shoot The Messenger,,,,,,PLEASE????????
 
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Old 09-23-2008, 08:06 AM
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Have your fun boys....heh..heh..
 
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Old 09-23-2008, 08:15 AM
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Originally Posted by NH-Hottie
Have your fun boys....heh..heh..
OH OH!!!!!
The Rachel Ray Of The East Has Spoken!
 
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Old 09-23-2008, 09:40 AM
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Originally Posted by billy12360
any more warnings?
You're wrong.
You're always wrong.
If something goes wrong, it's your fault. It doesn't matter if you were there or not, it's your fault. Deal with it.

 
  #13  
Old 09-23-2008, 10:18 AM
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Originally Posted by SuperSnake
<hr style="color: rgb(209, 209, 225);" size="1"> <!-- / icon and title --> <!-- message -->

Now....what is the moral to this story?

The moral is.....

If you don't let a woman have her own way, Things are going to get ugly.
Wrong, wrong, wrong ....

The moral of the story is: "It matters not how beautiful or how ugly one's wife is, deeply inside she's still a witch!"
 
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Old 09-23-2008, 10:23 AM
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Originally Posted by copper_90680
Wrong, wrong, wrong ....

The moral of the story is: "It matters not how beautiful or how ugly one's wife is, deeply inside she's still a witch!"
Close.

There are lots of nice girls out there, and then there are self-absorbed witches who will make your life hell, so don't get fooled by a pretty face, or some high-sounding feminist b.s. about self-determination, into marrying a witch.
 
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Old 09-23-2008, 11:15 AM
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just remember no matter how pretty she is,somewhere there is somebody fed up with her crap!!
 


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