I find this article interesting.

Who Says Kids Make You Happy? | Newsweek Global Literacy | Newsweek.com

I'm still quite young and have yet to start a family, but I was wondering what all of you thought about this. What did/do you feel about life if you chose to (or not to) have kid(s)?

 

I (like you) am in the young, yet to start a family category... but you are right, it is um... "interesting"

 

too tired to read it but, would I start a family today? tough question I would have to ponder it for a while.
as for my kids I wouldn't trade them for anything.
when you are gone and after everyone blows their inheritance that you left them you will only be remembered because of your kids. good or bad it becomes the only thing anyone remembers.

 

I remember when my son was first born, I could not wait to get home after work to see him. To me, having children is the most meaningful aspects in life.

I do feel sorry for people who decide not to have children, they do miss out on watching a child grow day by day developing his or her unique personality.

I still rush home to see my son (15 y.o. now) and I still think about him all the time. No matter what it costs financially to support him, I do not find it a burden to give him what he needs. (what he wants is another story - xbox, clothes, a Mustang).

Don't wait until it is too late to have children, they are blessings that are worth all the trials and tribulations.

 

IMHO things today really aren't different from years past in most respects.
Some people should have kids, and some people shouldn't. No harm no foul in either case.

Kids are always a drain, and some turn out rotten despite everything you try.
But they provide you with some immense satisfaction.

Pretty much I knew that I wanted kids, and I've never regretted it. I wouldn't put it in terms of 'enjoyment'. I'd just say that it made me feel that my life was more complete for having kids.

But, that's me ( and my wife!). We had 2, and that was plenty for us. One of my friends had 6, and he loved it. I was glad that we 'only' had 2

So, my (free and worth every penny) advice is to look into yourself. Don't have kids because of anybody else, have them if you want them. They're a huge amount of work and worry, and you have to feel that it's worth it.

Good Luck,

 

Being a Dad has to be the greatest thing that has happened in my long, eventful life. They're both in their 40's now, successful and raising some great grandkids.

 

I'm 20 years old and have 2 kids. The youngest just turned 1 and my oldest is about to be 3. My kids mean the world to me. My kids always come first. If I have had a bad day, they always make me smile. They are a pain in the butt sometimes but well worth it.

 

im 20 with one kid and love it. dont think i will EVER have another one. but my 2 1/2 year old is the cutest thing on the face of this planet.....and she knows it!

 

Children are indeed a blessing .
But remember in their eyes you are too.
They are always watching take it serious.
I have raised three sons and now have three grandsons
I have worked for the schools for 15 years
Their are a whole lot more good kids then good parents

 

I think it is really dependent on the person. Some people are happier with them some without. I have had a hand in helping raise a couple nieces and nephews and some stepchildren. I do not have any biological children and I intend to keep it that way. I truly do not have the patience. I have some genetic health issues I would rather not pass on as well.

 

I have to say I agree 120% with the article. I have one son and glad I do but I can give example after example of people that claim to love their kids and how happy they are then you see the truth in the actions. I think it is as the article states blasphemes to admit that you would have been happier to NOT have kids so no one with kids will ever admit that they made a mistake EVER.

Example one; my codriver, his wife just had to have kids to be happy so even though they really weren't financelly set the had one, (yes I know if you wait till your finances are perfect you never
will that is not the point here). Did it make her happy? for about 6 weeks until she had to go back to work and deal with the kid too, and HAD to go back because now they just HAD to buy this new house. then it was well we need two to make things great thats whats wrong (as well as becrying how she isn't a good mom because she has to work, but lets have another one that will make it better). So they did have another kid and it did make her happy.... for about 6 weeks until she had to go back to work because his $50k+/yr income is not enough to support them with all teh bills of the new house (which is not big enough now) and the SUV they ended up buying to be able to haul the kids. So now she is pestering him that well it's because they have 2 boys but if they can try again and get a girl THEN she would be happy... I figure for about 6 weeks. BTW she has told her mom that they have discussed it and they are going to keep trying until they have a girl which is funny cause he is ready to go have a vasectomy without telling her. My personal thoughts are kids are going to cause a divorce.

Second example; another truck driving family (first example we are home everyday so it's different in that respect) These are friends of mine he is gone 3-5wks at a time she is a stay at home mom. 3 kids that were supposed to make her happy, she actually thought she wanted another one too but has since come to her senses and realized it was a mistake to have the third one (but will never and should never mention that to the kids EVER) she is going nuts, and is HIGHLY resentful of hubby for being gone and working etc and when he comes home do you think she wants to spend time with him? no all she can think about is "I am going shopping then to a movie and YOU watch them I need some time alone" and exactly what happens. basically I figure this is one more marriage that is going to end because of kids.

that is just two of propably a hundred I could find within a short distance of my house, heck within 3 blocks of where I live there has been 5 divorces that even though it's not admitted you can see the fact that it was a direct result of the kids, every single one was a happily married couple until kids entered the picture one of those couples had been married for 10yrs had the first kid and were divorced within 2yrs (actually had a second one too) and the couple across the street that were married for 5 yrs before the first one and always seen holding hands and being together haven't been seen outside the house in each others company since the first child and I haven't evne seen them hold hands ONCE since and it's a constant battle going on over there.

So IF people were honest the answer is most definitely that kids will not and do not make you happy. They MIGHT bring some joy when you get to watch them suffer while having grandkids but thats about it. (grand kids on teh other hand are an absolute joy)

BTW my first wife and I ended up divorced before my son was a year old.

 

Im going to make a couple of points here taken as you want from a guy who is a father of two step dad of two and grandfather of two

My first wife grew into a lunatic as the kids aged. She forgot what it was to be a parent and allowed the kids from the age of 12 or so to walk all over her.. If i punished them for anything... she would wait til i turned my back and unpunished them.. punishments were grounding or taking away tv or something.. finally i had enough cause the kids lost respect for me as well as her cause they knew they could get away with anythng so i walked out the door and told her you created this mess you deal with it
they have since almost killed her and have little respect for themselves or anyone else
i remarried and have two step daughters now.. one is 21 and out of the house and the other is now 16 it took almost three years but the 16 year old and i have a pretty good understanding and respect for each other.. the 21 year old and i have always had a good relationship.. she is the mother of the granddaughter

Looking back not only would i have never married my biological kids mom had i the chance to do it over, i understand the point about kids taking a toll on a marriage cause it seems that women in particular go overboard for their kids ( ive had some arguments with the new wife over some of the things shes done for the step kids at her expense) and in some instances the mothering instinct goes haywire..
My wife has come back to not catering too much to the kids and after some therapy she discovered she was overcompensating due to her disasterous marriage she had to her first husband
but i do love kids and would prolly have had kids again if i had it to do over with.. i just woulda been alot more selective in my choice of spouses.. Kids are great in many ways but there are alot of influences on them and these days its too easy to spoil them and it seems that alot of parents are more interested in giving their kids everything and not teaching them about responsibility and life than to raise them with respect for each other , authority , and the value of a dollar.