I love kids too. As long as they go home with their parents. I wanted kids when I was younger, but am glad now that it never happened. Too many people already breed like rabbits, so I feel it's a good thing that my wife got "fixed" long before we were married. Kids are not an option anymore. I'm too old to even think about starting. I'll never really understand why it is that everyone seems to think they are obligated to produce as many kids as possible. Is it vanity, religion or what? Some people can stop with one or two kids...but these folks who seem to think they have to have a dozen kids... I think they are just plain vain, needing to create as many little replicas of themselves as they can. Blah.

Just my humble opinion. More power to those of you who just have to reproduce constantly. Some of us have given up our desire so I guess you all can just go like little bunnies.

 

Quote: "Just my humble opinion. More power to those of you who just have to reproduce constantly. Some of us have given up our desire so I guess you all can just go like little bunnies."
You have every right to your opinion, albeit insensitive and judgemental, and I appreciate your sharing it with us. We all are free to make choices and if giving "up our desire" works for you, that's fine. Next time (today) I experience the joy my children (2) and my grandchildren (7) bring to me in so many ways, I will be reminded how truly blessed I am.
Dono
__________________

 

I find it hard to believe that someone like you could call others vain!!! Why did you "decide" not to have children? To much time taken away for you, to much money taken away from you, to much stress, would it effect the physical appearance of your wife? Was it a lack of confidance in your abilities as parents, the fear of trying?

I get a whole other feeling from your post.....you really wish you had children, but that isn't possible for you now and you are lashing out at all of us that have experianced the FANTASTIC joys of having children.

On the outside, you would call me one of the vain people, who couldn't stop at one or two, we had to have seven. However, once you got to know us you would find out that they are all ours (sort of). You see I didn't sire all of them (some but not all), my wife didn't give birth to all of them (some but not all), but none the less we have raised all of them! They are part of us, we are part of them, we are a family and no one will every be able to take that from us.

So, it wasn't and is never to late to have children, unless you just are to vain, proud or afraid!!!!

Oh, yea.....just my humble opinon!


Seven wonderful children, six grand children (and counting) and still young enough to enjoy every minute of it (45). You can do the math!

 

I actually think it's the more responsible decision to not have children, if the things you list above are important to you. I understand you love your family very much, and that they are the most important thing to you, but for myself personally, I think it would very selfish to bring a child into this world, and not devote all my energies to raising it. There are certain things I want to have and do before I die, and I've decided I'm not going to expect a child to compete with them. I can't have a wife or raise a little one and have my toys (car, boat, truck, etc.) at the same time, so I've made my decision on what's more inportant to me. Given that, I make sure I don't find myself in a situation that I don't want to be in. No women, no kids. Everyone I know says that's a selfish, immature attitude. I want to know why. I respect anyone who takes on the challenge of having a family, but it's not for me, and I'm not going to feel sorry for it, that's all. Like I said, though, I've got respect for anyone who does have a family, I'm sure it brings you more happiness than you ever dreamed. Congrats.

 

HiDesertRat]
"I find it hard to believe that someone like you could call others vain!!! Why did you "decide" not to have children? To much time taken away for you, to much money taken away from you, to much stress, would it effect the physical appearance of your wife? Was it a lack of confidance in your abilities as parents, the fear of trying?"

I wanted kids with the first woman I was to marry. We never got married. By the time I met the woman I am married to she had been married once and they had decided their carreers came before having children. If you had read my post, you would have read that she got herself "fixed" before we got together. I have NO lack of confidence on my abilities to do ANYTHING I set my mind to do. I live in a state where income is not the highest. If I were to have children, I would wish to be able to give them a better life than I had, money wise. As it is, my wife and I both work, pay our bills to pay our house off, take care of our vehicles, pay taxes and JUST PLAIN SURVIVE! We do not make enough money to do all of the above and give children as quality a life as I think mine would deserve. If you happen to make mega bucks and aren't on welfare to help feed, medicate, clothe and school your kids, then whoopee for you. I refuse to go on welfare for the "joy" of raising children.

"I get a whole other feeling from your post.....you really wish you had children, but that isn't possible for you now and you are lashing out at all of us that have experianced the FANTASTIC joys of having children."

No..in this day and age, I have no desire to bring a child into a world that most of the time is pretty pathetic. I'm not lashing out at anyone...I was commenting. Perhaps I should just keep all of my opinions, that others MAY NOT AGREE WITH, to myself? Of course, I would expect the same of you, in that case. So be careful... you may say something you believe in and get attacked in return for voicing that opinion, as I did. I have no doubt that you love your children, whether they be yours, adopted or otherwise.

"On the outside, you would call me one of the vain people, who couldn't stop at one or two, we had to have seven. However, once you got to know us you would find out that they are all ours (sort of). You see I didn't sire all of them (some but not all), my wife didn't give birth to all of them (some but not all), but none the less we have raised all of them! They are part of us, we are part of them, we are a family and no one will every be able to take that from us."

And yes.. I will continue to stand with the fact that this world is getting so overpopulated, farmland is being eaten up by the thousands of acres on subdivisions daily, food such as Salmon and Tuna is being depleted. I will stand on the fact that I think an individual family giving birth to multitudes of children is vain. Women who take drugs to have quints, multiple times...that is VAIN. There was a time, early in this nation, when larger families were needed to help with the crops and the general survival of the family. Today that is not even close to a necessity. If you adopt...that's great. Too many people play bunny and aren't willing to accept the consequences of their actions...causing numerous orphans and disrupted lives.

"So, it wasn't and is never to late to have children, unless you just are to vain, proud or afraid!!!! "

"Oh, yea.....just my humble opinon!"

I'm not vain because I no longer want children. I'm rather proud of the fact that I am not contributing to world overpopulation and hunger. I'm not contrubuting to the buying up of farm land so that you and your posterity can have that cute little white house and picket fence in a brand new subdivision, raise your own children and give you the opportunity to be the "proud grandparents" that you desire to be.



"Seven wonderful children, six grand children (and counting) and still young enough to enjoy every minute of it (45). You can do the math! "

Go for it... have three dozen. Have your kids have three dozen. I'm old enough that I really don't care what you and yours do. When my time comes, I will leave this planet knowing that in my profession, I helped many people. Kept numerous people from suicide. Kept many psychotic people in control of their minds and actions, so as not to hurt themselves or others. I have helped many Developmentally Disabled adults have a life...one that was taken from them by selfish parents who only wanted them institutionalized rather than have the world know they produced "faulty" offspring. I will know I have raised my pets as they were my family. If I stop and think about it, between my wife and I, we have raised more of a family than you may ever be able to even comprehend. We raised a diverse family with special needs, every one of them. We loved them, and still do, as they were our own. We took them in and gave them training and aid when they were not wanted, we trained them to have a semblance of a life that before they had no expectation of. We gave them dignity, while most of the world still calls them RETARDS or CRAZIES.

Go ahead .... be mad at me for expressing myself. I don't care. But I still think having as many kids as you can produce is an act of vanity, whether you love them and get joy from them or not. Some people simply reproduce because it is their "right". Numerous welfare cases are based on just that simple fact alone.

Have a nice day.

 

Everybody has the choice and the right to have or not have kids, and frankly, many that do should not. I can come up with quite a few that never should have had kids, but have at least their share. If someone chooses to not have kids, there is nothing wrong with it. I agree, 51, too many people do have too many, and then have to be supported by welfare, ie, taxpayers. Raising kids is a big responsibilty and it is a more responsible choice to admit you may not be able to give them the life they deserve. It's easy to make the kids, but not so easy to take care of them, and there are way to many deadbeat parents already. I don't support the mandatory limits like China has, but there are cases where the parents are forced by the state to get fixed to keep them from being that way. A good friend of mine back in South Dakota was born with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. He didn't do this to himself, but he has to live with the poor choices of his mother. He wants to be a part of society, but society doesn't want him, because he's not as smart and has temper problems due to his affliction. He can't even have a vehicle, which is his pride and joy, because they are afraid he MIGHT try to take off, although he hasn't shown any tendency to do so. Im sure you understand his predicament, 51.

 

Good move, mod!! Some things need to be said, but not where they were.

 

And I've sent my apologie to the author of the original thread. My intent was not to hijack the thread...only to let something out that was inside me. Then I had to explain myself.

Oh well..another day..another soggy foot in mouth. What is that saying...open mouth and change feet?

I'm done and sorry I even expressed my thoughts to begin with. This thread has my permission to go extinct.

 

Not all of the blame is yours, Dick, so don't soak that foot in there too long!!

 

It's my foot and I'll soggy it as long as I want.

 

I can see where your coming from in some asspects but must disagree in others I hate all the mighty welfare breeders and those who just make them oops babys but as for myself I have 5 kids and would not trade them for the world
the financial strain that they place on me is minimal compared to the joy I receive in return and they are my problem financially moraly and lovingly not the states or other taxpayers but mine and if I thought that it was a burden that I could not have handled they would never have been concieved in the first place

 

But that's the difference, you take resposibility, and the people I refer to are not like you. I have no issue with large families, just be best if you can take care of themselves, as you indicate. It is a joy to me to handle my 3 kids, and as nature would have it, my wife is not able to have any more, which is ok by me, I have enough trouble keeping up with 3!!!

 

Hm..all this hostility. I'll go ahead and refrain from posting my oppinion...but, those that dont want kids..It's fun trying to make 'em.

heh..hehehe..

 

Nothin’ like a little late night controversy.

I too thought I’d be childless (never really liked anyone else’s kids either), inasmuch as I didn’t get married until I was 32 years old and the wife and I weren’t exactly planning on having kids within the first couple years, but it happened and let me tell you, there is nothing in the entire world that can compare to being a daddy. We’re lucky enough to have a 4 year old girl and a 15 month old little guy. Both are happy and healthy and life couldn’t be better.

Bottom line, to each his own when it comes to something like children, although responsibility for the children is an absolute must.

 

i didnt have kids til i was 37 years old, now i got 2, and somedays it is like hell and others it is great. tonight one of my kids friends came over and hugged me saying thanks for giving her some popcorn and letting her stay the night with my daughter. today was a good day.