Ye Ol State Trooper joke
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Postmaster
Joined: Mar 2004
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From: Michigan
Ye Ol State Trooper joke
So,I got pulled over by a state trooper last night,
He walks up and says,,
Would you mind telling me why after I pulled up behind you and turned my lights on,You sped up?
I said,,,My wife left me for a state trooper,and I thought your were him,bringing her back!
He walks up and says,,
Would you mind telling me why after I pulled up behind you and turned my lights on,You sped up?
I said,,,My wife left me for a state trooper,and I thought your were him,bringing her back!
Fleet Mechanic
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,385
Likes: 1
From: Mercer County, OH
Several weeks ago I was driving down the interstate and I hit a bird. It came right over the top of the hood and it got lodged under the windshield wiper. I wanted to pull over and get it off but traffic was pretty busy so I tried turning on the wipers. It went back and forth a few times and didn't come off so I turned the wipers on high. After a couple of sweeps the bird came off and went flying right over the top of my car and smacked the windshield of a Ohio State Trooper that was following me. Next thing I know he turns on his lights, pulls me over and gives me a ticket!
Apparently it's illegal to "flip the bird" to an Ohio State Trooper!
Apparently it's illegal to "flip the bird" to an Ohio State Trooper!
Elder User
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 626
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From: Rome, GA
An old man and old woman coming into GA from TN gets pulled over by a GA Hwy Patrol Officer. He asked the old woman for her license. She turns to her husband, in the passenger seat, and asked what he said. He replied loudly, he wants your license. The officer asked for her insurance. She again asked her husband what he said and again he replied loudly, he wants your insurance. As the officer was looking over the information he stated " I see you are from TN. I had the worst sex of my life in TN. She turns to her husband ans ask what did he say. The old man replied loudly, He said he knows you.
Laughing Gas
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,139
Likes: 4
From: Maine
A trooper pulles over a car that is travelling 7 mph. He approaches the car and he sees a little old lady at the wheel and 2 old ladies in the back seat that look quite terrified. He tells the driver that he pulled her over for going 7 mph. She replied that it was speed limit. The trooper informed her that it was Route 7 and the speed limit was actually 25 mph. The trooper asked why her passengers looked so scared. She replied, "Oh, we just got off of Route 126."
Posting Guru
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,958
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From: Southeastern Indiana
Originally Posted by bhardy501
An old man and old woman coming into GA from TN gets pulled over by a GA Hwy Patrol Officer. He asked the old woman for her license. She turns to her husband, in the passenger seat, and asked what he said. He replied loudly, he wants your license. The officer asked for her insurance. She again asked her husband what he said and again he replied loudly, he wants your insurance. As the officer was looking over the information he stated " I see you are from TN. I had the worst sex of my life in TN. She turns to her husband ans ask what did he say. The old man replied loudly, He said he knows you.
Posting Guru
Joined: Dec 2004
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From: Connecticut
Classic but a goodie.
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday, a woman passed
over a
bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side
lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic
patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your
hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered,
A rectum stretcher, and just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my
way up
to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand
in. I work
from side to side until
I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it,
until it's
about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot *******?" he
asked
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday, a woman passed
over a
bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side
lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic
patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your
hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered,
A rectum stretcher, and just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my
way up
to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand
in. I work
from side to side until
I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it,
until it's
about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot *******?" he
asked
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge
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