I've got a problem, fellas - need some advice.
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Postmaster
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 3,028
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From: Annapolis, Maryland
I've got a problem, fellas - need some advice.
This year, my parents will be out of town for Thanksgiving, so I'm going to my girlfriend's house for Thanksgiving dinner.
The problem is, my girlfriend's sister and her boyfriend are going to be there, and I quite frankly hate both of them.
Now I know "hate" is a strong word, but I stand by the statement above. Her sister has a real snotty, "I work at the mall" attitude, and her boyfriend is a flaming idiot - every time he opens his mouth, I debate whether I should get up and hit him in the face.
I haven't spoken to either one of them in months - but I see them 2X a week.
So at any rate, on Thanksgiving, while my girlfriend and her mom are preparing dinner, I'm going to be sitting in the family room with the two people that I hate the most in this world.
I'm honestly considering just staying at my house and making a sandwich - I'll enjoy the company more.
Thoughts? Ideas?
XXL
The problem is, my girlfriend's sister and her boyfriend are going to be there, and I quite frankly hate both of them.
Now I know "hate" is a strong word, but I stand by the statement above. Her sister has a real snotty, "I work at the mall" attitude, and her boyfriend is a flaming idiot - every time he opens his mouth, I debate whether I should get up and hit him in the face.
I haven't spoken to either one of them in months - but I see them 2X a week.
So at any rate, on Thanksgiving, while my girlfriend and her mom are preparing dinner, I'm going to be sitting in the family room with the two people that I hate the most in this world.
I'm honestly considering just staying at my house and making a sandwich - I'll enjoy the company more.
Thoughts? Ideas?
XXL
Postmaster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 3,628
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From: Baileyton, TN
If you clash so badly with the family, try to stay sober, or far away from them. I make it a rule to avoid people I really do not like, not because I am supposed to be nice, but because I don't want to be nasty. I cannot suffer fools gladly, don't like snobs, and can't stand pretentious families.
Theo
Theo
Posting Guru
Joined: Sep 2003
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From: N. Florida - The "No 4x4
Big Matt asking us is not wise. You need to ask your girlfried, and then complain to us after she answers you.
Get your priorities straight here - unless you want to be SingleBigMattXXLwell into the future.
Get your priorities straight here - unless you want to be SingleBigMattXXLwell into the future.
Lead Driver
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 7,746
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From: Tampa Bay, FL USA
Originally posted by theologian
....I cannot suffer fools gladly, don't like snobs, and can't stand pretentious families.
Theo
....I cannot suffer fools gladly, don't like snobs, and can't stand pretentious families.
Theo
As for the advice, I say this: if your presence would be more hurtful than not being there at all, then consider staying home. You'll be happier, and if it's not that big a deal with your parents, then why not? I mean, if there's just NO WAY you're going to get along with these people, why fight it?
Postmaster
Joined: Feb 2003
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From: Kentucky
hmmm, been there, done that. Since you will be at your girls parents house, you may not know it, but your actions at their home will be judged. By that , I mean her parents will be making mental notes about just "who" is dating their little girl, and would he be a good future son - in - law. So, just play a mind game, block out in your mind who your really having to deal with, and all the animosity you have for them, and just make nice. The dinner will only last a couple of hours, the impression on how you acted at your girls parents home, will last a long time good or bad, on your girl and her parents. If you play the hide and ignore game, everyone will see it. Her sister and sweetie pie, for two hours of forced socializing ,aint worth hurting your relationship with your girl or her parents, good luck dude, 
Postmaster
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,775
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From: Conway Arkansas
I honestly wouldn't go...
I've been in spots like that and I've learned to just not go.
Your girlfriend may or may not understand, but no need to spend a day thats supposed to be "Thankful" with a bunch of people that you wish would drop off the face of the planet
I've been in spots like that and I've learned to just not go.
Your girlfriend may or may not understand, but no need to spend a day thats supposed to be "Thankful" with a bunch of people that you wish would drop off the face of the planet
Junior User
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 93
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From: Fond du Lac, WI
Well, ya could do a few things-
1. Help out in the kitchen-your g/f would appreciate the time spent with her.
2. Take g/f's dad outside and show the F-150 off to him. Be very thorough-show him all the mods, etc.
3. Restrain yourself-I've got the same problems-but if you ignore the two idiots, they eventually go away.
1. Help out in the kitchen-your g/f would appreciate the time spent with her.
2. Take g/f's dad outside and show the F-150 off to him. Be very thorough-show him all the mods, etc.
3. Restrain yourself-I've got the same problems-but if you ignore the two idiots, they eventually go away.
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Postmaster
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,848
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From: Kentucky
Originally posted by Andysutt
I honestly wouldn't go...
I've been in spots like that and I've learned to just not go.
Your girlfriend may or may not understand, but no need to spend a day thats supposed to be "Thankful" with a bunch of people that you wish would drop off the face of the planet
I honestly wouldn't go...
I've been in spots like that and I've learned to just not go.
Your girlfriend may or may not understand, but no need to spend a day thats supposed to be "Thankful" with a bunch of people that you wish would drop off the face of the planet
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Posting Guru
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From: inver grove heights MN
when it comes to being around people i dont like, and alcohol- those people are better off not being around me. so i try to avoid them.
maybe you could get a flat tire, or your truck could run out of gas? through a gas can in the back of the truck for "special effects"
do you have any cousins you could go visit?
maybe get stuck at work late?
i just think theres some way that you can just not be there or show up as late as you can
good luck
maybe you could get a flat tire, or your truck could run out of gas? through a gas can in the back of the truck for "special effects"
do you have any cousins you could go visit?
maybe get stuck at work late?
i just think theres some way that you can just not be there or show up as late as you can
good luck
Posting Guru
Joined: Jun 2002
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From: inver grove heights MN
Originally posted by BuiltToughF250
when it comes to being around people i dont like, and alcohol- those people are better off not being around me. so i try to avoid them.
when it comes to being around people i dont like, and alcohol- those people are better off not being around me. so i try to avoid them.
Posting Guru
Joined: Sep 2002
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Here is what you do.......
Go to your local auto parts store, Buy however many quarts of oil your truck takes. Don't forget the oil filter. ALso you want to bring all the tools you need to perform an oil change.
THen when you arrive at the house, tell those TWO people you hate, that you don't have time to talk becuase, It;s very important that you change your oil before dinner because you are 5000 miles over the reccomended change interval,
THen go in the driveway and work slow, stop working once dinner is ready!!
Probelm Solved!!!!!!
Go to your local auto parts store, Buy however many quarts of oil your truck takes. Don't forget the oil filter. ALso you want to bring all the tools you need to perform an oil change.
THen when you arrive at the house, tell those TWO people you hate, that you don't have time to talk becuase, It;s very important that you change your oil before dinner because you are 5000 miles over the reccomended change interval,
THen go in the driveway and work slow, stop working once dinner is ready!!
Probelm Solved!!!!!!
Postmaster
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,775
Likes: 2
From: Conway Arkansas
Originally posted by Greg 79 f150
Andy, would the seriousness of the relationship, not be a issue here? If Matt is serious about this gal, even marriage maybe, would he not need to show the parents that he can deal with a little adversity ? When one marries, like or not, you marry the brides family. If her family turns against you, then your bride's life will be miserable. He doesnt HAVE to like these two, but it IS her sister, that part wont go away for a life time. He can let the girls parents know his feelings about the two, maybe later when he has a better and more grounded relationship with them. I guess its all how important this gal is to him. I learned the HARD way, blood is always thicker than water, every time. cheers
Andy, would the seriousness of the relationship, not be a issue here? If Matt is serious about this gal, even marriage maybe, would he not need to show the parents that he can deal with a little adversity ? When one marries, like or not, you marry the brides family. If her family turns against you, then your bride's life will be miserable. He doesnt HAVE to like these two, but it IS her sister, that part wont go away for a life time. He can let the girls parents know his feelings about the two, maybe later when he has a better and more grounded relationship with them. I guess its all how important this gal is to him. I learned the HARD way, blood is always thicker than water, every time. cheers
No, actuallly to be quite honest with you... Id say forget it.
I wouldn't go... If I couldn't stand them that bad, Id explain it to her. Sure it may affect the seriousness of the relationship or whatever... but so would it if they got into a fite or what not.
Better to comprimise in relationships.
My g/f knows i hate her stepdad and I wont be around him. And she respects that. So we have made other plans... Shes going there for Thanksgiving, and when I get off work Im going out there, after he leaves.
Junior User
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 56
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From: Tennessee
this is my advice........"Dude get over it"
Now that being said ask yourself this question. How important is my relationship with this girl, is she the one that Im going to spend the rest of my life with or is she gonna be gone in a couple of months. If she is the first then you need to treat the sister and her boyfriend like a chick flick that your girl makes you watch once a year and go and suffer through. Spend time in the kitchen and try and avoid the other couple.
Now Im not saying enjoy it but at least give it a shot and try and be sociable if the guy says something stupid, ignore it and say something wise to one of the rents like "hey nice truck sir not to bad for a chevy" Trust me if this guy is as dumb as you say then the folks are gonna be more than happy to hear some smart conversation. If anything it would be a chance for some late night dessert from the gf.
Hope that helps!
Now that being said ask yourself this question. How important is my relationship with this girl, is she the one that Im going to spend the rest of my life with or is she gonna be gone in a couple of months. If she is the first then you need to treat the sister and her boyfriend like a chick flick that your girl makes you watch once a year and go and suffer through. Spend time in the kitchen and try and avoid the other couple.
Now Im not saying enjoy it but at least give it a shot and try and be sociable if the guy says something stupid, ignore it and say something wise to one of the rents like "hey nice truck sir not to bad for a chevy" Trust me if this guy is as dumb as you say then the folks are gonna be more than happy to hear some smart conversation. If anything it would be a chance for some late night dessert from the gf.
Hope that helps!
Elder User
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 872
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From: Oxford, Alabama
Suggestion.
Just a suggestion. One, do what I've done--don't. and I mean don't. I have done away with all holidays, I don't do any of them. Not only is it a lot less stressful, its a whole lot cheaper.
Second. miller tyme called it about right, just avoid them as long as you can. If the little snot does get in your face, lay him out. That usually solves that problem. Of course it does cause some others but then trading one problem for another is usually the result of most arguements.
Second. miller tyme called it about right, just avoid them as long as you can. If the little snot does get in your face, lay him out. That usually solves that problem. Of course it does cause some others but then trading one problem for another is usually the result of most arguements.