I am not sure of the exact name of the condition but I’ll explain it a bit. There are certain situations that people tend to freeze and are unable to react and think clearly. Example, if someone gets really scared they sometimes have a tendency to become unable to move. The military has a great way of dealing with these pressures by yelling in your face and depriving you of sleep. All of these are techniques designed to stress the body to perform under stress and pressure.

My question is how can I train my wife to react to an intruder attempting life threatening harm? She is young but due to a serious accident, she is not able to move very well. When I am away from the house I sometimes worry for her safety. What do you all suggest for me to do to get her to be able to react in a situation and not freeze up? She is experienced with handling guns and is a decent shot. I just don’t want anything happen when it could have been prevented.

I have not yet spoken to her because I do not want her to get nervous about something actually happening. The best scenario is that nothing ever happens. However, it is best to be prepared. I figured I would get some opinions and solutions to the problem before I bring it up with her.

Is there anything aside from military enrolment that anyone can suggest?

 

A Rottweiler?

 

firearms training

 

Both of the above.

 

I think a different tact is in order.

Mental Outlook is the key - not motor skills.

You can buy a big bad dog. You can take firearms courses until you puke. You can buy her pepper spray for one hand an a 12ga for the other and it'll make no difference if the worst happens. In fact, chances are you will be providing her with the implements of her own doom.

~Unless~

She comes to understand that what she has is worth protecting at any cost.

When the worst happens she needs to be LIVID that someone - anyone - would DARE thretten her or what she holds dear.

It is called the fight or flight response.

Unless her *reaction* (not thought process, but gut reaction) is fight - she WILL loose in a confrontation with a determined . . bad guy.

So . . . all you have to do is convince her that she is so important - as a person - that she comes to believe and accept that anyone trying to harm her is FAIRLY DUE grevious bodily harm.

Trust me on this one. I have seen some big bad motor-scooters turn to jello when the . . . stink, hits the fan. Mental Outlook is the key - not motor skills or fancy hardware . . or even Rotweilers.

HTH.

 

Role Playing: Make up some scenarios, realistic ones that happen in home invasions every day of the week. We see them in the papers, and on TV. Explain your reasons...don't need to lose sleep over it happening, but it's all a big lottery, and everyone's in the pool.

Act out the scenarios over and over until the responses become automatic. Poeple make fun of visualization techniques (Bumper Sticker: "Visualize Whirled Peas" with a pic of a blender full of green slop) but visulaization actually works to help automate responses. When bad things happen, you don't have time to think it through. You need to have ALREADY have thought it through, many, many times, and your responses become programmed, automatic.

On the street, it's not QUITE this simple, but inside your home, your wife rules.

PS - If your wife is a good shot and comfortable around guns, fine. But there's no substitute for frequent practice. Shoot often.

 

I would suggest a book called "Strong on Defense", written by an ex-police officer named Sanford Strong. He talks about visualization and attitude. Unlike a lot of current mistaken beliefs out there, he recommends fighting over complying with a criminal and offers examples to back up his recommendation. However, don't take my word for it, read the book as there are things you should and shouldn't do before you fight (escape should be your first line of defense, don't try to be macho). Firearms are great, but chances are you won't have time to dig one up unless you have plenty of warning. And, if you have kids, you have to worry about where that bullet will go when it goes through the wall if you try to shoot someone in the house. It is incredibly tough to shoot someone during a close combat situation and chances are you will be firing several or more shots just to hit your target once.

A word of warning though: The author tells how crimes go down, not just the end results of the crimes. He presents some pretty disturbing material (no pictures though) and it may make it hard to sleep at night. So, read it in the middle of the day rather than right before you go to bed.

I would also pick up some martial arts or similar type books. Pay attention to the targets. A lot of martial arts today are really sports that stress form and technique. But, in a fight, you need to hit vital targets, not look good doing it. Kicking someone in the nuts (can I say that?) is not a for sure stopper, so you'll need to know where else to strike.

 

from expoerience i can tell you that training takes over during times of stress and trouble, you kick into action mode and do what you are supposed to do then think about it later...ie some kinda training at multiple sessions is in order, maybe even martial arts/self defense

 

...That fact is you never really know how your going to react, until it happens...As stated elsewhere in the post training is the only proactive solution...
The idea is to subconciously instill the muscle memory and mental midset to take appropriate action when the need occurs with minimal concious thought....2 or 3 days a week for a couple of months of martial arts usually wont do it unless it is a extremely intensive and focused program, even so it will need follow on training/practice...there is no learning curve like pain.
...When I say Martial arts in mean "military arts"...weapons, armed/unarmed etc etc. preferably with emphasis on the offensive mindset not defensive....
...I once studied (briefly) with a "self defense" instructor, who did not believe in sparring because the techniques he taught were to "dangerous"...I asked him, "so how else will we learn self control...?" He never did answer me...
...Ive seen people both in the classroom and in the street get hit for the first in their lives and they froze up....With PROPER training you can minimize or even prevent that reaction...
just my $.02

 

Vanhecht, what kind of training have you had? I suspect you might be referring to law enforcement or military training you've had. I've tried martial arts and my son has tried 3 or 4 different instructors. All have been heavy on the "show" and light on the "go", if you know what I mean. I found myself asking where's the beef? It hasn't been totally useless. I found that it's good for coordination and balance, but to get effective training, I think you would need something like what Cato (Kato?) and Clouseau did. But, where can Joe Public get the good stuff?

 

All the training in the world can't prepare you for the terror of being attacked.
Ever been startled in the dark by something or somebody? You freeze up, no matter what. Some people lash out, but most dont, and it's that split second that counts in most cases.
I don't keep my guns loaded or near my bed, because I stand a better chance of killing myself or my girlfriend than an intruder, all training aside.
It sounds like you are looking more for peace of mind than anything; I don't think you can do anything for her besides take measures to make your home safer. Even the baddest person out there is easy to kill in their sleep.
Oh, and get a Rottweiler. I think you would be pleasantly surprised how protective it would be of her.
BDV