Ok, I loaned a friend one of my cars, a good running 95 acclaim. Showed him how to check everything, including oil and told him to keep an eye on it. He calls me the other day saying he left it in a parking lot because it was overheating. Told him I was busy and would check on it the next day. He texts me a few times asking if I had a chance to look at it... The same day...

Anyway, I go look at it and it's got no oil and a spun bearing. He tells me he checked the oil and it was fine, then later says he put a quart in it. I asked if he checked it before then and was told "no, it was running great and not making any noise."

I put a quart in it and it wasn't on the stick. Yeah, the 3.0's are slow to drain back, but there really was no oil in it.

He wanted to know how long till I fixed it... I told him it didn't matter as I wasn't letting him use the car if I did fix it. He got upset with me because he's going to lose the job he just got because he can't get there. I informed him he could perform an anatomically impossible act with himself...

So much for trying to help someone out...

 

You're a better man than I am Gunga Din.

Had that happened to me, I probably would have been uncivil enough so that
he wouldn't have asked when I would have it 'fixed up'

Too bad about his job, but gee, maybe if he would have checked the oil, there wouldn't have been a problem.

Can't understand how somebody can borrow something and not take care of it.

Hope tomorrow is a better day,

hj

 

did he at least offer to pay to have it repaired?

 

Almost always the start of a sad story........been there, done that at least a million times my own self. Doesn't matter if its money, a vehicle or anything else, seems to go bad far more often than we hope or expect

For some reason I always seem to fall for those sob stories and honestly believe I'm helping someone. Maybe its my inability to see through someone, a slightly trusting nature or could be I bump into great actors---never have been able to figure out why I appear to be an easy touch. Then again I'll help anyone almost anyway I can anytime without expecting anything more than a thank you (unless its a loan that requires returning something.)

I'm also of the thought screw me over once and that's the end of it---never again will I extend myself for them. I will remain cordial or even maintain the friendship but they never again "get in my pocket" so to speak. If I'm dumb enough to help them again then its all on me for being such a dupe.

What's most disappointing is the behavior and lack of appreciation for my help. Despite a possible loss of money or a possession the disrespect seems the biggest loss.

Your friend seems slightly overly entitled and putting far too much responsibility on you for his own mistakes. You're out whatever the Acclaim costs or the repairs and perhaps a "friend" also---hope you didn't lose too much in either regard.

Vent away---know how much relief that can be.

 

Haha... He's po'd at me because he's going to lose his job...

It's a cheap car, so it's not a huge loss, but it ran well. I just had it inspected and it passed with flying colors.

Makes me wonder what really happened to his last car.

As far as friendship; I don't need friends like that. I know he's broke, but there's always something you can do.

 

Bummer about the poor car, I hate people like that that won't at least try to take car of someone else's stuff when they use it, heck when I use someone else's car truck tool or whatever it may be I treat it like I am gonna die if I mess it up. I work it easy and make sure I'm not gonna do something bad to it in the process.

 

Send him the bill.......

 

There's a reason people like that, are in situations like that....

 

The longer I live the more that becomes the gospel truth!!

Try as we might we'll never be able to help those unwilling to at least try helping themselves.

 

ain't that the truth.
a guy i know was at rock bottom. i got him a job, and drove him to and from work for 3 months.
then i found him a car, and gave it to him, plus the money for insurance and registration with the understanding he would pay me back at $100 a month for the next 10 months.
this was 2 1/2 years ago.
he started off good, for 2 months.
then the BS excuses started.
he has moved on to 4 different jobs over the past 2 years.
he averages $1000 per week. claims he can't pay because of child support garnishment.
i saw one of his pay stubs, he only pays $75 per week in child support.
he still owes me $740.
he called the other day wanting to borrow $20 so he could get gas to go to work.
i told him i am broke, did not get paid yet, and have no money in my pocket because no one has been paying their debts.
he did not understand how i could not have any money, even though he makes more than i do. but he pisses his money away on booze, drugs, and hookers.
i have cut my losses on him, and doubt i will ever see any money from him again.

and because of him and a few others that take forever to repay, the "bank of Tom" is now bankrupt and out of business.


it is also really sad that my own 20 year old granddaughter is more responsible with money than 40-50 year old men.
she refuses to accept money presents from me when i help her out, and pays me back every penny plus interest if it takes longer than a month to pay it back.

 

I've experienced that before. Almost 12 years ago I had a friend who's car finally went to the big car wash in the sky. Loaned him a Prizm i wasn't using with the agreement that he would pay me $100 a week till a $500 total was reached.

Of course he ended up not being able to pay me due to having to find a new place to live and all that other sad fecal matter. A month later and still no money he calls me and says that the car won't start. He doesn't know what happened. I went pick the car up on a trailer and brought it back to my house. Further inspection reveals that the engine is locked up and there is no oil in it. I decided to scrap it.

Now the car had most of his earthly belongings in it that I called him to remove. He never did until the day after the car was sent to the scrap yard. I dug through a little bit to see if there was anything sentimental he might want later (because I'm not that big of a doll hole), I didn't find any keep sakes but I did find myself a pair of almost new boots (still have them and am wearing them as I type this) and a couple other articles of clothing. Of course he got mad and called the police, they just told him he should have came collect his stuff and told me to have a good day. Never talked to him after that.

 

That's an impressive young woman----that sort of responsibility and independence is either born-in or instilled at home. Either way its a quality that'll serve her well her entire life.

I was beginning to think I was the only "soft touch" but it seems leeches are everywhere. When some new instance of flaking out happens I swear that'll be the last time I try help out the unfortunate---right up until the next time.

I hate losing any money on a bad investment but as cavalier as it sounds its only money, if I have it to "loan" for the most part when/if its never returned its no financial issue for me personally. The lesson learned about that one person though I consider nothing more than tuition to the school of hard knocks. Call me Mr One & Done from there on.

Then the next day someone does something for us or maybe otherwise shocks us into being reminded more people than not are good hearted and follow through with their promises. Perhaps for that reason alone I go to extreme lengths these days to be as upstanding and forthright as I possibly can in order to repay another's generosity or kindness towards me.

Plus acting responsibly sets an example, whether directly or indirectly its helpful I want to believe.

 

i agree, she is one of a kind. and you are rite, it came from a good home upbringing, and knowing she would get a swift kick in the *** id she did anything wrong.
i have outstanding loans of over $6,000 over the past 25 years that i will never see a penny of.
and since i am now on sorto of a fixed income i have started saying no.
i will offer financial help, but it is only to a select few. anyone that comes knocking out of the blue now gets told to take a hike.

 

I gave my daughter and SIL a perfect 1999 Taurus Wagon with 130K miles on it. 14 months later the transmission crapped out. The car had been maintained to the letter and I outlined all the service that the car would need in the upcoming year. None of that ever happened.

They'll never get anything else from me for free.

 

Did they ask when you were going to fix it so they could have it back?