Notices
General NON-Automotive Conversation No Political, Sexual or Religious topics please.

Why Parents Drink

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
Old Dec 10, 2010 | 01:43 PM
  #1  
brd7666's Avatar
brd7666
Thread Starter
|
Laughing Gas
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,025
Likes: 1
From: Clearwater Fl.
Why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.


Love, Your Son John


PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.

I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card That's in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.
 
Reply
Old Dec 10, 2010 | 04:04 PM
  #2  
thefordlane's Avatar
thefordlane
Senior User
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 225
Likes: 0
From: dodge, north dakota
haha i just laughed my *** of because of that. hahahaha
 
Reply
Old Dec 10, 2010 | 06:04 PM
  #3  
rockin300's Avatar
rockin300
Post Fiend
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,154
Likes: 0
From: lost in WI
nice i bet that dad had a drink
 
Reply
Old Dec 11, 2010 | 06:54 PM
  #4  
trike1946's Avatar
trike1946
Logistics Pro
20 Year Member
Liked
Loved
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,292
Likes: 5
From: NJ where fun comes to die
Club FTE Silver Member

Children are the reason we drink, have gray hair, and have ulcers. I tried to childproof my house, but they still get back in.
 
Reply
Old Dec 12, 2010 | 02:24 AM
  #5  
ATC Crazy's Avatar
ATC Crazy
Hotshot
Community Builder
Loved
Community Favorite
Top Answer: 10
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 12,353
Likes: 4,389
From: SW VA
Ctrl-C
Right-click
Print



Geeze...I really needed that my last couple semesters of college. My grades were something like
F
F
W (Withdraw)
F
W





Mom about had my head on a stake. She didn't talk to me for a week!
 
Reply
Old Dec 12, 2010 | 02:28 AM
  #6  
nebo's Avatar
nebo
Posting Guru
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,027
Likes: 0
From: Freetown, Indiana
.........
 
Reply
Old Dec 12, 2010 | 06:56 AM
  #7  
hanklin's Avatar
hanklin
Hotshot
20 Year Member
Liked
Loved
Community Favorite
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 13,011
Likes: 742
From: Here in No. Calif
sure did draw me in. Very good indeed!!
 
Reply
Old Dec 12, 2010 | 03:24 PM
  #8  
driximus's Avatar
driximus
Posting Guru
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,317
Likes: 0
From: Auburn, Wa
Club FTE Silver Member

Yup that is enough to get the bottle pouring.
 
Reply
FTE Stories

Ford Trucks for Ford Truck Enthusiasts

story-0

10 Ways Ford is LOSING to the Competition

 Joe Kucinski
story-1

Top 6 Best Deals Available on New Fords & Lincolns Right Now

 Brett Foote
story-2

This Hennessey Takes the Expedition Tremor's Off-Roading Capability to the Next Level

 Verdad Gallardo
story-3

Top 10 Fords at 2026 Carlisle Ford Nationals

 Joe Kucinski
story-4

3 Best / 3 Worst Parts of Modern Ford Ownership

 Brett Foote
story-5

10 Amazing Upgrades That Solve Common Ford Truck Owner Headaches

 Pouria Savadkouei
story-6

Every 2026 Ford Engine Explained

 Brett Foote
story-7

10 Ugly Ford Trucks That We Still Kinda Love

 Joe Kucinski
story-8

10 Things Every Truck Owner NEEDS (2026 Edition)

 Michael S. Palmer
story-9

Rezvani's Latest Post-Apocalyptic Monster Is a Ford F-150 Raptor Underneath

 Verdad Gallardo
Old Dec 12, 2010 | 07:41 PM
  #9  
Flexfuel-Dave's Avatar
Flexfuel-Dave
Elder User
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 678
Likes: 0
From: Central, MA
That constituted breaking open a new bottle.
 
Reply
Old Dec 12, 2010 | 08:03 PM
  #10  
rt2000's Avatar
rt2000
New User
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 15
Likes: 0
headin for the fridge now!
 
Reply
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
w6pea
General NON-Automotive Conversation
0
Mar 2, 2015 11:08 AM
00BlueOvalRanger
General NON-Automotive Conversation
9
Dec 2, 2013 09:47 AM
TWolf
General NON-Automotive Conversation
42
Aug 16, 2005 08:56 AM
ranger rules
General NON-Automotive Conversation
39
Jan 13, 2005 01:01 PM
1997RangerXLT
General NON-Automotive Conversation
6
Jul 2, 2003 08:02 PM




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:21 PM.

story-0
10 Ways Ford is LOSING to the Competition

Slideshow: 10 ways Ford is losing to the competition

By Joe Kucinski | 2026-06-15 09:52:01


VIEW MORE
story-1
Top 6 Best Deals Available on New Fords & Lincolns Right Now

Some great targets in today's expensive world.

By Brett Foote | 2026-06-15 09:35:19


VIEW MORE
story-2
This Hennessey Takes the Expedition Tremor's Off-Roading Capability to the Next Level

Slideshow: The VelociRaptor Expedition gains a lift, upgraded suspension, Brembo brakes, and trail-ready equipment while retaining the stock 440-horsepower EcoBoost V6.

By Verdad Gallardo | 2026-06-12 11:01:55


VIEW MORE
story-3
Top 10 Fords at 2026 Carlisle Ford Nationals

Slideshow: Top 10 Fords at 2026 Ford Nationals

By Joe Kucinski | 2026-06-09 11:10:08


VIEW MORE
story-4
3 Best / 3 Worst Parts of Modern Ford Ownership

Based on years of owning multiple modern Ford products.

By Brett Foote | 2026-06-09 10:53:36


VIEW MORE
story-5
10 Amazing Upgrades That Solve Common Ford Truck Owner Headaches

SPONSORED: From muddy boots to rain-soaked cargo, these upgrades address some of the most common frustrations Ford truck owners face every day.

By Pouria Savadkouei | 2026-06-08 18:50:34


VIEW MORE
story-6
Every 2026 Ford Engine Explained

Here's everything you need to know about every Ford engine available for the 2026 model year.

By Brett Foote | 2026-06-05 12:58:01


VIEW MORE
story-7
10 Ugly Ford Trucks That We Still Kinda Love

Slideshow: 10 ugly Ford trucks that we still kinda love.

By Joe Kucinski | 2026-06-03 09:51:16


VIEW MORE
story-8
10 Things Every Truck Owner NEEDS (2026 Edition)

Slideshow: the best gifts for dads & grads

By Michael S. Palmer | 2026-06-03 15:43:58


VIEW MORE
story-9
Rezvani's Latest Post-Apocalyptic Monster Is a Ford F-150 Raptor Underneath

Slideshow: Called the Fortress, the 850-horsepower pickup combines Raptor underpinnings with military-inspired features, survival equipment, and a starting price of $285,000.

By Verdad Gallardo | 2026-06-03 11:38:36


VIEW MORE