Man every other year i fall down, bump my head and make about $100.00 worth of christmas cookies. it takes two years for the memories to fade enough to try the operation again. Well this was the year, %#@*&! I will give a nice box of christmas cookies to whomever will drive over and just nut punch me repeatedly!! The only stipulation is... you must make it hurt enough that i dont forget the pain in 2 years. i spent all day making cookies, I made about 250 and delivered about 130. I still have about another 180 cookies to be baked yet. right now they are out in my big black and silver refrigerator on wheels. i havent driven my car in 3 weeks, figured that would be a good place to keep them frozen. i am cookied out, i dont look forward to baking the rest of them this upcoming weekend.
So get this i am at the bulk grocery store buying the need4ed supplies, Ugh, woman shopping drive me nuts. Quit your lollygaggin, and get out of the way when you have your head inside that nice warm place between your legs. so i get boxed in by 2 sets of women, i cant go anywhere, literally cant move. they just want to debate there needs and chit chat, in the middle of everything. they see me trying to get out, ignore me and continue lolligaggin. finally i have enough, i huff, jesus christ, yank my cart straight sideways and start trying to push through. The older woman in one of the groups(60's) says to me " do you have an EFFIN problem" ( she used the real word!!!, go ahead and kiss that grandma) So i tell her yes i did they had me boxed in and unable to go about my business in a nice polite, unassuming manor, i didnt appreciate it and further more she could Pi$$ off! So then she has the gall to say "wow, what a gentleman" Was she kidding me!!!!! I didnt drop the F bomb, and i was the one polite enough to get my cart off to the side out of the way.
Well that about ruined my xmas spirit. if i would have had my truck with me i think i would have put the trailer hitch through her door. I hate people who live with there head up there a..!
ok rant over, come nut punch me and claim your cookies, i have plenty so you can all come if you would like. otherwise just pm me your address and i would love to rebuild my xmas spirit by sending you a small pkg of cookies.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!,


FELIZ NAVIDAD, FELIZ NAVIDAD, BLAH , BLAH, BLAH BLAH, i wanna wish you a merry christmas, I WANNA WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS, I WANNA WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS, FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY heart!!!!!
no disrespect meant there that is my favorite xmas song, i just dont know all the words. Dan

 

You're getting a PM and I want my cookies, damnit.

Didn't you realize the two ladies in the grocery were trolling? You were probably there on singles night and they were looking at you as fresh meat.

Can we also get a picture of you in an apron?

 

I could come by and do it.... I was in your 'hood' today. But I kinda like christmas cookies. And nut-punching another guy really isn't my thing............ Should have stopped over at HD, picked up a couple tubes of adhesive and glued her doors shut why she was in Gordon's.

But there were LOTS of ignorant drivers over near the hospital(RMH) today.(Like the tool who drove about 8 blocks in the flippin turn lane)



BTW, Blah,Blah,Blah= prospero ano y felcidad (sorry no spanish character support)

 

ya know whats funny about this,HE's baking cookie's never knew ya had in ya there Dan. chear up tho in a few days itll all be over with and everything will get back to normal. oh by the way ill take some of them their cookies too

 

Here ya go ya' lazy thing you.....ever heard of google?


Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad
Prospero año y Felicidad
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas
From the bottom of my heart

 

whowey, you live near by? look me up we can get together, merry christmas.
Wizzard, i knew i could count on you, yes i embrace my inner betty crocker every now and then.
and finally but certainly not least, Thanks Ray, you arent around much, but i can always count on you, and your unique perspective. after baking 250 cookies, and frosting and sprinkling, i feel i have earned a little lazy time. careful what you ask for, i got the wife a new digital camera for christmas, i just may post up an apron shot, after the big day! hehehehehe!

oh bye the way, i need an address if you want cookies, dink!
Dan

 

That is funny time.

 

barbie's and betty crocker now ive heard it all .

 

hey sometimes you guys end up cooking things better than us woman lol, and besides nothing wrong with being called betty crocker that's what hubby was called in school he took home and carreers in school but just to be with the girls lol and I have to say he does cook way better than me I have a habit of over cooking food lol, .

 

Danny Bro........Will you talents never end.!! You amaze me.!

BTW....MERRY CHRISTMAS

 

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. . . cookies!


Me likes cookies.


My wife makes some delicious cookies every year, at Christmas time.
Hundreds. Literally. Toll House. Chocolate Chip. Old fashioned Sugar cookies! Wow! My favorites!
Chocolate pies. (Family tradition. Her Dad taught her how to bake pies.)
Apple pies. Pumpkin pies. Pecan pies.

Fudge. Peanut Butter Fudge. Brownies.


And to think. . . . my wife has the NERVE to ask me why I have to walk through the kitchen door, sideways!!!!!!!

 

Can I have my cookies shaped like a barbie doll with a santa hat.

The only one in my family that makes cookies is my aunt who the wife and I begged for some for Christmas and we thought we were going to get until today when a cheese assortment showed up

Edit: Dan I will trade you a nice cheese assortment for some

 

[Homer voice]mmmmm Cheese[/Homer voice]

 

I know what you mean by the womem at the grocery store. I do all the grocery shopping as I'm the cheff in our house. I'm supprised I have not blown up before now.

 

You can by "blow up women " at the grocery store ?