LAWS OF THE NATURAL UNIVERSE

Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or
you'll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire,
the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to
move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

Law of the Bath:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with
someone you don't want to be seen with

Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the Theatre:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive
last..

Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to
do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor
covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

 

hmm.. I suppose you're right.

Ryan

 

Peter's principle: No matter how much you drink, you can't fall off the floor.

I tested this many times in my youth and have found it to be true.

 

Way too much truth

 

My problem is when I am on the toilet, sombody comes to the front door.
I did unplug the doorbell.

 

Haahaahahaahahaha, I swear that happens to me at least once a week. I know one of these times I will go out with the tp hanging outta my pants trailing to the bathroom!

 

law of engine mechanics-any tool dropped in an engine bay will never reach the floor.

 

I know thats the truth!