Please submit your ideas for a NEW sport for the Winter Olympics.

Here are a few that I read today :

• The freestyle snow shovel: Olympians are given a 10-metre by 10-metre stretch of pavement covered in snow and ice and must clear it as quickly as possible using standard snow-removing tools (which in Canada, may or may not include portable flame-throwers). Three fastest times claim the medals.

• The 500-m slippery sidewalk shuffle: Olympians are timed as they try to manoeuvre down a slippery section of sidewalk covered in snow and ice. To add to the authenticity, male athletes must compete wearing standard-issue black wingtip shoes, while women athletes will scurry down the course in high-heeled boots. No protective equipment is allowed. Medics will be standing by.

• The Tim Hortons 500-m dash: Similar to the sidewalk shuffle, only athletes try to make their way across a hazardous, black-ice covered sidewalk holding a tray-holder with four cups of Tim Hortons coffee (medium double-doubles, naturally). This is a combined scoring event, in that the medals are awarded based on the lowest timed score in completing the race and the smallest volume of coffee spilled.

• The stall push: This team event sees four Olympians try to push a stalled 1984 Delta 88 1,000 metres down a snow-covered, unplowed residential street to a nearby service station. Fastest time wins. Phoning the Canadian Automobile Association for a tow will result in a disqualification.

• Street hockey: Pretty much as it sounds – Olympic hockey teams square off on a designated neighbourhood street with old wooden sticks and a ratty old tennis ball that hurts like a (insert really bad word here) when it freezes up and you get hit smack in the face with it. Teams play until it gets dark or the International Olympic Committee calls the game due to dinner. The IOC will send cars through on occasion in order to give the TV stations a chance to go to commercial.

• The public skate: Olympians are judged on their ability to work their way through an uneven, frozen pond full of poor skaters, big cracks in the ice, slow-moving novice skaters, families teaching their three-year-olds how to skate and obnoxious teenagers whipping around the ice crashing into people. Points are awarded for style, artistic merit and not breaking an ankle after getting a skate caught in a six-inch rut in the ice.

• Figure scraping: Competitors must remove layers of frost and ice from a car’s windshield using only a credit card while performing triple-toe loops and double-Axels in order to keep from falling down on the snow-packed pavement.

 

i think a snow plow compitetion would be nice, and a snowman building contest, and a snowball war!!

 

what about the polor bear club? last one out wins!

 

Calligraphy snow writing...think about it

 

what about toboggan bowling. Setup people like bowling pins and put a team on a toboggan. The team that knocks down the most people and causes the most serious injuries wins!





Jim

 

Snow cone eating contest -( can you say brain freeze)

 

how about hide the Lucky Loonie in the ice rink?...
.....oh wait... that already is an olympic event....


http://www.cbc.ca/olympics/sports/sp...eaf060225.html

 

Boy you guys are getting dull

I was expecting some really cool ideas like:

1) Full contact Curling

2) Frozen Beer Sucking

3) Wet Tonque on frost fence marathon

4) 10 Km Snowshoeing and carrying a deer on your back.

5) Olympic Ring Toss at Blindfolded Skaters

6) Zamboni Races

7) "Try to cut a hole in the ice", Figure Skating competetion

 

Tactical biathlon??
what the heck......give them guns in any sport and call it biathlon..... Figure- biathlon...hockey- biathlon....skelton-biathlon.....maybe some 50-calibers on a bobsled...


Sumo figure skating?


bobsled jumping (off the big ski jump)


speedskating hurdles?


chinese downhill (first one to the bottom of the ski hill wins....one rule .. NO RULES!)


make "the Harding" a legitimate move in figure skating and award points for style and infliction.. "Buttles is scheduled to perform double harding to Sandu before he goes onto the ice to do a quad sowcow. lets hope he can cleanly break both knees"

 

Chicken - with Bobsleds

king of the hill . . . of air - fly two guys up on that big fan they had in the closing ceremony and try to push each other off.

bumpercars on ice - you push yourself around with a stick, the stick can double as a weapon.

http://www.ucomics.com/foxtrot/2006/02/19/

-matt

 

Lol typical canadian sport eh haha

 

These are hilarious! Now, how many of you have actually played some of these? I'm part of a slippery sidewalk shuffle team from a couple years back. I was on a deployment to Kyrgyzstan in the dead of winter. Back end freezing cold, the roads weren't really plowed, just kinda packed down. Sand was placed right at the stop signs, not all along the roads. Anywho, back then, the base we were at was made up of coalition forces from a number of countries to include South Korea, Norway, Denmark, Italy, Spain, the U.S., and the Dutch. Well the Dutch ran the best danged chow hall you could imagine. Of course it was outside of tent city proper but since we had some of our workcenters over that way (called Ops Town), we would have to go check on them usually at lunch time. Guarenteed one of us would bust our butts on the way over. I was doing good for the longest time and in fact it had been so long since I had fallen, I threw myself down just to get it over with because I knew it was coming. On the days we went to the chow hall in tent city, we would follow the road (no other option) from our compound to the chow tent and back. It was covered in gravel rocks and had porta potties placed ever so far apart all around the walls of the entire tent city. Hmmm, projectiles, and targets. It was good to be a kid again. We would kick rocks along as we walked and if no one was in the way, we would target the porta potties. One day, my buddy Tim nailed an open door porta pottie, mid air, it slammed shut, and we dang near died of laughter. All from about 30 feet away. That may seem to be all kid stuff, but it was me (First Sergeant) the Commander (a Major), Tim (Master Sergeant) and another Master Sergeant all making our way back from lunch. Done the figure scraping too. We had John Deere Gators over there for transportation. I really didn't need my debit card for much more than, yup, scraping ice off the little windows. Ahh the memories.

Rich

 

"SUV slide". Competitors drive a large SUV while talking on a cell phone. They accelerate up to 70 mph on ice and then attempt an emergency stop.

 

Hockey Mom triathlon (proudly supported by Tim Hortons)

First, you have 40 minutes to drive to a remote Ice rink 50 miles away through a blizzard in a rusty, 10 year old minivan with 7 screaming, sugar-charged 9-year olds onboard.

Next you have to tie 14 pairs of skates within three minutes.

Then you have 3-12 minute cheering sessions where your graded on the following; 1. how well you encourage your kids to hurt the other team . 2; how well you can insult the opposing team of 9 year olds and thier parents. 3; Threats and insults directed towards the referee.

 

This is the best and how true - 2 thumbs up!!!!!!