I like that about the buses. Me and my first both cuaght the first bus and rode it for four years until she dicided that she wanted the second and the third and fourth. Me I played with all the buses for seven years after and finally cuaght the second and been on it for 13 years and even have 2 extra passengers and one
on the way. So as everyone else is saying, play with the bus and the right one will eventually come. Only the good eye thinks its the end, not your mind, i hope.

 

Couldn't have said it better myself.

- Chris

 

Some say "First time, shame on you. Second time, shame on me" but that also becomes emotional. I think you need to just disconnect, and distance yourself a bit for a while. USE YOUR HEAD, but don't roll with anything. Just give it time to settle.

There are times when apathy is a blessing in disguise...

But be objective, and don't forget anything.

ONEDIT: BOLDLY put, I'm looking for a way to delicately say: "Brother- Don't do anything stupid!"

UNUM: She did not commit to you, she is playing around.
SECUNDUS: You wanted it to be far more serious than she evidently did.
TERTIUS: There is a loyalty issue. You expect loyalty, don't you?
What happens if she wants you again suddenly? Will you let it happen twice? Even if nothing like that happens, is the trust between you compromised?

Be honest...
(No response required or expected)

 

Yea I do want loyalty, and trust. She has lost my trust, but if she wants it back bad enough she can earn it.

I kinda lost my head in that last post. She ISNT a girl to sleep around with a bunch of different guys...this I know. I have asked around from unbiased sorces when I first met her. It was a mistake that she made, and she knows it. What I think is that she got caught up in the moment, she made him stop and she went home (this is when she called me bawling her eyes out but wouldnt tell me why).

She was my best friend. When we were together and hanging out, we could BS together like best friends and think nothing of it. Its being apart that kills us.

Now I know that some of you will bring up "if she were your best friend then she wouldnt of done that to you"....yea....I know. And I will bring this up tonight.

Im basically going to go in there and put my foot down.

The ONLY way I will keep going on with this is if
1-She calls that guy and tells him that she cannot see him anymore, and no longer talk to him. (In front of me)
2-I will tell her that she can tell me she loves and all that jazz, and that she "needs me" (her words) but I will not believe a word of it. She will have to show me.

If she wont agree to those then I will get up and walk out that door saying nothing more.

I know there is a flaw with number one, cause she could easily just call him back up and tell him that she "had to do it, but didnt mean it". I will keep that in mind.

I am willing to work through this, and keep dating her, but at the same time I will look for other busses. The difference with me is that IF I find that girl that I want to take that extra step with (like she took with that guy) I will break it off with her FIRST.

Deep down this girl really is a good girl, I have always felt it in my gut. And my gut has never been wrong. I felt something like this happening in my gut. I kept saying "I knew it I knew it I knew it" and she was like "what are you talking about".

We will either start dating agian when she regains my trust, or I will walk out that door.

 

Is she a friend, or not?

INTERROGATIVE????

Define the relationship

Is it worth it, or are there other possibilities..

(This is a deliberate plant)

 

Put all her stuff in bags, drop off at her house, get a dog (4 legged kind), go fishing.

 

A big part of life is love and loss. Unfortunately it hurts like hell (no matter how old or how young you are). Fortunately it teaches you, it makes you stronger, and it gives you an understanding of what you are really looking for in a relationship. You've already figured out that you want a loyal love with morals and dignity. See how much you have learned already.

So next time you will be more cognizant of a girl's character and make a choice to love her for the what she is instead of what you want her to be. If she doesn't display the characteristics that you are looking for then have fun and then move on.

About six years ago I thought I was in love. I was dating the trophy girl. She was the one that everyone wanted and I had her to myself. We moved in together and things started to go south. She was enjoying all the attention that she was getting from a lot of other guys and decided that she didn't want o be tied down. After screwing me financially she moved to California and I was hurt for some time. She turned out to be the most self centered, selfish, immoral person I could have ended up with. After her I bounced around from girl to girl and left before I could get hurt again. About two years later I decided that if I never forgave her that I would never move on and be able to give my heart to someone else. So I called her. She was so excited to hear from me. She started talking about how sorry she was for everything and that leaving me was a mistake. She wanted to come visit me. It fealt good to hear, but I told her that wasn't the reason I had called. She asked why I had called then. I told her that I called to forgive her. I think I heard her heart break when I said that the only way I could ever forget her is if I stopped hating her. I never spoke to her again after that, but two weeks later I met a girl and I was able to give my heart to her. We just got married in May and we've been together for almost 4 years now. My wife is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I wouldn't change a thing. Its the hard lessons that prepared me to recognize the incredible woman that my wife really is.

Forgive my rant. Just understand that this girl that you are hurting over so badly now is beneath you. Learn from her and move on because there is someone that will make you forget about her and show what it truely means to be loved.

 

I dont know if Im in the mental position to decipher that

There are always other possibilities. What she shows me tonight will be what makes or breaks this relationship.

Interrogative???....?
How should I define the relationship?


As for getting a 4 legged creature to go fishing....well I just might do that.

 

Worked for me! In fact, the first date my current wife and I went on was fishing. She baits her own hook, too (how good is that!)

 

Lots of good advice in here, you should take it. You are the only one who knows all of the angles to your relationship; but I would advise that going back is a mistake. I made the same mistake once, a long time ago. I can tell you from experience that the second round will crush you far worse than what you're experiencing now. Move on, learn from this episode, and undertsand that integrity defines people. She doesn't have it, and probably never will; keep yours.

 

Well, its time for an update if anyone is interested.

Ill spare the details (if you wanna know, tell me)

To make along story short.

I got there and we drove around trying to talk, maybe get some closure. It wasnt going in a direction I liked, things were said that didnt help her case. I told her to take me back to my truck. Told her goodbye and left.

Im done with her. I dont deserve to be treated like crap and I can do much better. Maybe not in the looks department (shes really hot), but deffenitly can find a girl that will treat me right.

Thanks everyone.

 

Good on you- there are other out there. I'll chime in with the other Ernie (GreenSubmarine) on second go-arounds. Works great with pizzas, generally sux with relationships. I recall making that mistake once myself.

 

originally posted in the club fte jokes thread.....

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?"

The girl said "No."

And the guy lived happily ever after and went hunting a lot.
THE END

All I have to say is be glad you figured this out before you were married to her,and were doing the family thing...I speak from experience,here. It would have been cheaper to keep her,that is for sure,but I just couldn't be gone away from home without wondering what she was doing in the very house I was buying for her(which I am buying for myself now). anyhow,not trying to discourage you,but you do have to be careful if you are looking for a lifetime mate. I gave it a shot,didn't work out,and now I do what the joke I posted says,and take my 2 boys and daugther with me every chance I get!!

 

Like the song say's " Some of Gods greatest gifts, are unanswered prayers"

 

Its funny now, cause I almost feel like Im over her. Everytime I start to feel bad for leaving, I just think of what she did to me, and how she treated me and always put me down. She is actually making it easier to get over her. I still feel like crap, but I know Ill get over it.

This is a walk in the park compared to what alot of people have been through, they are still alive and kicking (Im assuming), and so will I.

Ill post an update, Ive got a gut feeling that this isnt over yet.