Whoa! That's hard to beat. Good advice, Greg.

The only thing I can add is, "Close that paperback, turn off the TV and walk that broken heart....

 

Hear Hear Do what you want to Do

 

thanks for the kind word 150 and Orn. I get carried away at times I see, but I am passionate about young people and their problems. What makes it hard is seeing these young people going thru the same things I did, and I know NOW , what not to when growing up. Life is like taking a major test, then getting the lessons handed to you. cheers

 

Keep your head up brother, I believe we've all been there one time or another. I know I have. I enlisted in the Marines right after high school. I could have gone to college, but I wanted to be a Marine first. Next thing I knew, four years turned into eight. It really flew past though. I got out after coming home from Iraq in 2003. Now I've tried to go back in but can't due to medical issues. Sometimes you've just got to do what's best for you. As for your lady friend, maybe if you do enlist, you could get her away from that freak she's with and give her the life and love she deserves. Remember, you've always got a family right here.

Ric Beach
Bruin52

 

Well, this is all some really good advice. My only concern about the military is that if you join the service thinking it will get you out of a slump, you may not be completely correct. The Military can be just as lonely of a place, starting it out can be the toughest, from Boot Camp to your Advanced Individual Training, it will be very hard mentally and physically. Not that you couldn't do it, but you want to do it for the right reasons or it may be an even more difficult situation than the one you're in right now. Don't get me wrong, I am sure that you would make a fine soldier.

I agree with the thought of becoming closer to your God, through prayer. Oftentimes we can get out those feelings that we just can't say to others. Have faith in him and surrender your life to him, ask for guidance and direction, but most of all courage. These are tough times we live in, many of us are surrounded by evvil things and evil people. Courage today is what keeps us moving on.

Try to live your life without any regrets, the last thing I want to do 50 years from now is look at myself in the mirror and think of all things I could have done, all the things I was afraid to to do for whatever reason, all the people I could have helped, but chose to "mind my own business." Any act of kindness can brighten a person day, in turn helping other will naturally lift your spirits. The greatest kindness a person can do for another is sacrifice something of their own. I don't mean give all your stuff away, but just the little things. You'll see them, opening a door for someone, or even something they wouldn't normally be able to do for themselves. It gives people a sense of hope, and in turn lifts them up, if even for a short while. Who knows, your simple act can make someone realize that life is worth living and save their life without even knowing it.

As for your female friend . . . I never want to be that other guy. We've all known him, he's the one our girfriend/ wife betrays us with. The one that has no regard for anyone elses feelings. Often times the girlfriend/wife doesn't even mean anything to them, just a piece. I know that you mentioned you care for this girl, but you may be asking for trouble that you don't want from this other guy. People who are into drugs and especially the dealer types are into some bad things and have some bad ways of dealing with problems, which there are many of in that business. Don't be that guy, you're better than that. Like aforementioned, make her choose, be there for her if she needs you. Just don't let her string you around while she decides what to do. If the situation is bad for her and she really wants out, she will.

As for your family, I can't agree that their love "CAN be severed," I just can't. Maybe because I was raised very close to my family, with very strict morals and a strong family base. Let me ask you, if anyone of them ever needed anything to this day, would you pull through for them, even knowing what you said before? I am sure you would, just like they probably would. Blood is thicker than water, and a parents love can never de extinguished. i have a Son, and I would never be able to let my love diminish. Try to involve yourslef ore with your family. Have you attempted to connect with your step-dad? I have to believe that people are generally good, I believe that if you make am honest and sincere effort to connect with him or even reach out, that he will recognize your effort and make one of his own.

I may be an idealist, but I believe that nothing good comes without great effort, that if it is worth it, then it is worth the effort. People ARE generally GOOD, people will often times take the easy way out or do what is wrong because they lack the courage to do what is right. Kindness is the only virute that rewards everyone involved, even the smallest things may mean great things to someone who needs it.

Sorry for the long post, I'll shut up now. Good luck Wezol5484. We're all here for you.

 

Wow, excellent post David, I was hoping someone would point out the reason for becoming a soldier should have a higher level of achievement. In regard to the "severed family love" I agree to disagree. I personally know sons and daughters that havent spoke to their parents in 10 or more years. To this day these people hate their parents, so it can happen. And true, MOST parents will never severe the love for their child, it is almost humanly impossible , but it has happened. And again, a great post of inspiration you have done. thanks

 

wezol-
"I think (99% sure) that Im depressed...and It sucks. I can hide it and be happy around people, but once I get by myself....well....
Just seems like nothing ever ever goes my way, at all."

if i had a nickle, or even a penny for everytime i felt that way...

for most thats a highly common feeling, but the typical person wont admit it.

you said you wanted to enlist in the military... well if you ever plan to, maybe seeing a professional or taking meds for this current problem might not be the best idea... if they believe you are depressed, they most likely wont take you in the military. joining the military may give you the boost you need to enjoy life, to accomplish goals, and to prove to others that you can face challenges.

about this girl you met- you need to approach that with caution. first off, if her current b/f is a drug abuser, theres no telling what he may do if you take his girl from him. so, watch out for him. and i know you said you and her only cuddled and kissed... not a big deal, she probably misses affection. but from situations ive seen my friends get into, girls who will date a guy like him for two years have a hard time leaving him. youll be way too good of a guy if you dont call her names, abuser her, cheat on her, sell drugs, show up high on cocaine... so be careful. dont be too forward with her, let things roll at her speed, some girls get freaked out if you call too often or want to spend too much time around her.

maybe you wont believe me, but in everyones life- when things are already down they can only go up... ive just about given up numerous times, but then something in my life changed and i felt better about everything.

good luck

 

Do remind the family that the military encourages and pays for college

One of the military ads for college education.

 

I'm a technical training instructor in the Air Force. Every class is full of 18-19 year olds and most have the same story. Don't really want to go to college, don't know what they want to be, tired of going to school. The military, any branch will give you something to focus on and a feeling of accomplishment. You also get a lot of money for college to use when you are ready. In the Air Force we don't get shot at too much. We send our officers to get shot at.

 

hey wezol! havent talked to you in a while. i havent been on here much lately. work work work.

im sorry to hear that things are looking bleak for you right now. i have read some of the responses to your post, and not to discount anyones advice, but i think poeple are being a little too general and a little too patronizing. im not sying they are wrong, but this is not what you need right now.

you are at a point in your life where, for the first time, everything is up to you. you think that you had choices before, but think about it. from now on, every decision you make will have an effect on the course of your life. realizing this is the first step to REALLY growing up. i for one am proud of you. i didnt start thinking about my future until i was 25. i had problems that you seem to have already overcome.

so you've met a girl and you want to run off and join the military huh? i admire anyone that is brave enough to jump into the fire. that being said, i dont think you should join at this time in your life. take a step back and look at your stiuation from a different perspective. you have found two things that might potentially bring you happiness, and thats what you really desire here isnt it? i dont think you should choose the girl either. her and the military are both just guesses.

most important right now for you is to not put yourself in any situation that is difficult to get out of, (emotionally or legally) because you have too many questions. i know you think that it would be nice if things were decided for you, like if you were drafted or if the girl left her man and proclaimed her undying devotion to you, but that is just your childhood talking. i know its scary as he!! to have to live with the reprocussions of your choices, but it also allows you to take responsibility for the good things you do in life.

wezol, this girl has way too many issues for someone as "undecided" as you are right now. be her friend and dont let yourself fall in love with her. as a matter of fact, stop falling in love with girls you havent met yet. (you didnt know that i knew about that didya!) put some limits in place as to what you will and wont put up with, from anyone, not just girls, and stick to it.

your answers are not found in a womans arms, or at a drill sargent's feet. they are inside you, and they have been there all along. see yourself as strong and you will be strong!

your first assignment is to ask yourself, "if i was in the military, what would i like to be doing?" then find a way to start doing it now, on your own, and screw anybody who doesnt understand! you are a man now, you finally get to put your foot down about something! doesnt it feel good?!
matt

 

Thanks everyone and thanks Matt.

Huh? Are you stalking me
But seriously, your gonna have to refresh my memory Matt lol

I'm not necessarily looking for the military as an escape. Its something Ive been longing to do ever since I was a freshman in highschool. I want a combat MOS, I want to be a Ranger. I talked to my mom today about going to college after I get out, or while I am in. She really wasnt happy, but supports me. My dad will support me too, but I have yet to call him up and tell him. I just want to wait for the right time. I know he wont be happy, and surprisingly, my stepmom is the least happiest of them all about me joining up. My mom, dad, and stepmom all do support the military and will support me, which does help out alot.
As for the girl...I havent talked to her much today. Im just going to give her some space and let her get her stuff sorted out.

 

So agian, I got about 2 hours of restless sleep last night....any ideas to get sleep without taking pills?

 

After you have folded up that book, turned off the TV and went out and did some good excercises, come home, take a hot bath (shower) and re-open that good book (or Good Book) and read. That'll put you out like a light.

It's hard to stay within the guidelines here on something like this - but, there's always One that is ready to listen and give you the most unexpected answers. Give that a try, too.

 

Hang in there dude,Ill be down there in a couple of weeks,and I will show you how to break stuff on your truck,dont worry.I will also show you how to fix it.Trucks are like women,if you baby them they do something to tick you off anyway,so if you get good at working on your truck,you wont have time for any women anyway!Hehe.Cheer up buddy,when I get down there I plan on lookin you up,and Big Orn.The three of us can be like the three amigos.I get to be Steve Martin,I called it!

 

Wezol, hang in there. Listen to all the support and advise people are offering for you. I went through a depressed period when I graduated too. I was so used to looking forward to graduation and being surrounded by peers (god and bad) that when it ended it was all most worse than dealing with the imature BS. I too was having relationship issues and family problems (parents couldn't decide to be divorced or together). On thing that helped me out when I was feeling low was to make a list of all the things I was grateful for like my job, my truck, my health, my horse.... or a list of all the things I wanted to do in my life like places to visit or project cars or whatever your heart desires. And last, exercise helps so much. Just going for a walk or going out and messing around in the garage. Don't sit and stew on problems it solves nothing and make you feel worse.

I wish you the best, keep your head up this is the begining of your adult life, there is lots to look forward to.