Happy birthday!
The mechanical bull
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Postmaster
Joined: Mar 2004
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From: Michigan
The mechanical bull
As some of you know,wednesday was my birthday.Well a couple of my homies come by to celebrate and toss some darts out in my garage.After awhile,the conversation turns to my new age and somebody says,Man you really ARE old!I tell him,listen here,This old man will whip any one of you puppies on the mechanical bull at the bar on the corner.Of course them being young and stupid,and me being old and stupid,they said PROVE IT!So off we go,and as luck would have it,when we walk in,there is nobody on it.So I go over and hop on and start the ride of my life.Well Im a hootin and a hollerin and having a good old time for about a minute and a half then BAM.Yup,Im on the floor!Everybody in the bar is laughing.Ok,no big deal,I pick myself up and waddle up to the bar and order a fuzzy navel (not really,I just like saying"Fuzzy navel" 
.While I am waiting for my Fuzzy navel ,I see a sign behind the counter.It says $1000 to the man who can stay on the bull for a full three minutes.So I go back to the table and tell me buddies about the sign,They tell me GO FOR IT!So I figure,what the heck,I belly on up to the bull like some bad bubba out of a John Wayne movie and hop on.Well,I start hootin and hollerin,my buddies are all hootin and a hollerin and cheering me on,Everybody in the bar is pointing at me and yelling to the bar owner!Well Im watchin the clock,passed my three min mark and jumped off just as the owner was walking over.Im thinkin cool,he is bringin me my G note.Instead he tells me to stay off the bull from now on.I say fine,just give me my grand,I earned it.He says,no you didn`t.But if you want to try again,this time I will turn the machine ON!So I bellied up to the bar like some beatup bum from the bowery and ordered,,,,,,,,,A FUZZY NAVEL!
On edit,I think maybe I should have titled this thread,,,FUZZY NAVEL
.While I am waiting for my Fuzzy navel ,I see a sign behind the counter.It says $1000 to the man who can stay on the bull for a full three minutes.So I go back to the table and tell me buddies about the sign,They tell me GO FOR IT!So I figure,what the heck,I belly on up to the bull like some bad bubba out of a John Wayne movie and hop on.Well,I start hootin and hollerin,my buddies are all hootin and a hollerin and cheering me on,Everybody in the bar is pointing at me and yelling to the bar owner!Well Im watchin the clock,passed my three min mark and jumped off just as the owner was walking over.Im thinkin cool,he is bringin me my G note.Instead he tells me to stay off the bull from now on.I say fine,just give me my grand,I earned it.He says,no you didn`t.But if you want to try again,this time I will turn the machine ON!So I bellied up to the bar like some beatup bum from the bowery and ordered,,,,,,,,,A FUZZY NAVEL! On edit,I think maybe I should have titled this thread,,,FUZZY NAVEL
Last edited by King Triton; Jul 24, 2004 at 05:05 PM.
Hotshot
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 12,170
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From: The hills of No. Calif.
This sounds like Bull to me....! But Happy Birthday, old fella! (Side note: someone of our generation doesn't usually use the term "Homies".) I guess you're just as old, or as young, as you feel! -TD
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Joined: Sep 2002
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From: Texas
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Postmaster
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,659
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From: S/C Texas
I got a good visual with your story. It made it all worth it. I'm jealous......I like your speed. With harmless intent......gettin all stupid and funny in public is what lifes all about.
Wish I woulda thought of that........but I will, I just wont tell anyone you did it first.
Wish I woulda thought of that........but I will, I just wont tell anyone you did it first.
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About 5 yrs ago, my right shoulder hurt so bad that I had a doctor look at it. The diagnosis was bursitis and the treatment was a cortisone? injection. After the "treatment" which worked immediately and allowed me to raise my arm above shoulder level again, the doctor asked me if I had ever injured my shoulder in the past. I couldn't remember any major events, but one night while going through a box of old photographs, I found several pictures of myself and an old drinking buddy riding "El Toro" the mechanical bull that used to be in one of our local bars. I remember that the rule was that you could only use one hand to hang on with and wouldn't you know it? the pictures show me hanging on with my right hand! Since the doctor is also a good friend of mine, I'm going to show him the pictures the next time I see him and tell him about all the fun we used to have riding "El Toro" betting each other a drink for the person that could hang on longest! I guess that I'm lucky to still have my arm attached to me, Of course age & wisdom have overtaken me and my mechanical bullriding days are over...
