TEEW Funny!
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From: Michigan
TEEW Funny!
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.
The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.
The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."
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Joined: May 2003
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From: Gilbert, Arizona
That reminds me of another good'n.
Mr Bear and Mr Rabbit are walking in the forest when they both spot something shiney in the distance. They both pick up there pace until they are in a dead sprint and both lunge at what happens to be a magic lamp. The Genie pops out and grants them both 3 wishes. Mr. Bear goes first and his wish is to make all the other bears in the park to be female, so there will be no competition with any other bears in the area. Genie grants his wish.
Mr Bear isnt satisfied with that so he says "for my 2nd wish I want all the bears in the COUNTRY to be female" just to be sure there will be no male bears to ever come close to all his female bears. Genie grants his wish.
For his 3rd wish Mr. Bear goes all out. Mr. Bear says "For my final wish I want ALL THE BEARS IN THE WORLD to be female." So the Genie grants his final wish and now every bear in the entire world besides Mr. Bear is female.
Its Mr. Rabbits turn for and his first wish is for a dirt-bike. Now that he has his bike he needs a crash helmet so for his second whish he ask for a crash helmet. At this time Mr. Bear is discusted and pokes at Mr. Rabbit for comming up with the dumbest wishes.
Mr. Rabbit has one last wish. He fires up his dirt bike, puts it in gear, and just before he pops the clutch he says "for my last wish, I wish for Mr. Bear to be gay"
Mr Bear and Mr Rabbit are walking in the forest when they both spot something shiney in the distance. They both pick up there pace until they are in a dead sprint and both lunge at what happens to be a magic lamp. The Genie pops out and grants them both 3 wishes. Mr. Bear goes first and his wish is to make all the other bears in the park to be female, so there will be no competition with any other bears in the area. Genie grants his wish.
Mr Bear isnt satisfied with that so he says "for my 2nd wish I want all the bears in the COUNTRY to be female" just to be sure there will be no male bears to ever come close to all his female bears. Genie grants his wish.
For his 3rd wish Mr. Bear goes all out. Mr. Bear says "For my final wish I want ALL THE BEARS IN THE WORLD to be female." So the Genie grants his final wish and now every bear in the entire world besides Mr. Bear is female.
Its Mr. Rabbits turn for and his first wish is for a dirt-bike. Now that he has his bike he needs a crash helmet so for his second whish he ask for a crash helmet. At this time Mr. Bear is discusted and pokes at Mr. Rabbit for comming up with the dumbest wishes.
Mr. Rabbit has one last wish. He fires up his dirt bike, puts it in gear, and just before he pops the clutch he says "for my last wish, I wish for Mr. Bear to be gay"
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Joined: Apr 2004
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From: NH
those were bolth great. kt your the guy who always has to rain on every ones parade by bringing reality back to it aren't you? that's ok i'm the same way.
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Tuned
Joined: Jun 2003
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King Triton, that was a good one, that last guy is so fricking evil...i would do that if i were in that position.
one question tho i missed it...what is your position on guns? i mean dont go into a big speach just a quick blurb as to your position...it perked my interest the way hkiefus said what he said in his post above.
Signed,
The Don
one question tho i missed it...what is your position on guns? i mean dont go into a big speach just a quick blurb as to your position...it perked my interest the way hkiefus said what he said in his post above.
Signed,
The Don
Senior User
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 258
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From: Eastern NC
hmmmm if bear wished for all bears to be female that would then make him a female and then for rabbit to wish him gay would mean he would be a well le@#%^n and so he/she would be one happy bear anyway!
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Postmaster
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From: Michigan
The Don
We are not supposed to discuss things of that nature anymore,but without going into details I will try and explain.I made a comment about getting rid of handguns and things went downhill fast.I regret posting it because some people now view me as an anti,My idea was not to infringe upon others rights but to help stop inner-city crime.Maybe my little brother would still be alive.And for the record,I admit it was a bad idea.I have guns,I hunt mainly deer,but might start going for rabbit to help fill the freezer.One other point,I only kill what I eat and with four kids.a couple of deer in the freezer sure helps on the grocery bill!
We are not supposed to discuss things of that nature anymore,but without going into details I will try and explain.I made a comment about getting rid of handguns and things went downhill fast.I regret posting it because some people now view me as an anti,My idea was not to infringe upon others rights but to help stop inner-city crime.Maybe my little brother would still be alive.And for the record,I admit it was a bad idea.I have guns,I hunt mainly deer,but might start going for rabbit to help fill the freezer.One other point,I only kill what I eat and with four kids.a couple of deer in the freezer sure helps on the grocery bill!
Government Teat-sucker
Joined: Oct 2003
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From: Virginia Beach
Originally Posted by quarterhorsemom
hmmmm if bear wished for all bears to be female that would then make him a female and then for rabbit to wish him gay would mean he would be a well le@#%^n and so he/she would be one happy bear anyway!