Yes, it's the one we've all been waiting for ... the
Darwin Award
2003.

The candidates have finally been released! For those not familiar with the Darwin Award, It's an annual honor given to the person who provided the Universal human gene pool the biggest service by getting KILLED in the most extraordinarily stupid way. As
always, competition again this year has been keen.


DARWIN AWARD CANDIDATES


* In September in Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.

* In October, a 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally zoned when he ran," accidentally jogged off a 100-foot-high cliff on his daily run.

* Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when an 8-foot-deep hole he had dug into the sand caved in as he sat inside it. Beach-goers said Daniel Jones, 21, dug the hole for fun, or protection from the wind, and had been sitting in a beach chair at the
bottom Thursday afternoon when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach, on he outer banks, used their hands and shovels,trying to claw their way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not reach him. It took
rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him while about 200 people looked on.
Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.


* In February, Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed in Lompoc, CA, as he fell face-first through the ceiling of bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth (to keep his hands free) rammed into the
base of his skull as he hit the floor.

* According to police in Dahlonega, GA, ROTC cadet Nick Berrena, 20, was stabbed to death in January by fellow cadet Jeffrey Hoffman, 23, who was trying to prove that a knife could not penetrate the flak vest Berrena was wearing.


* Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed in

February in Selbyville, Del, as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.

* In February, according to police in Windsor, Ontario, Daniel Kolta, 27, and Randy Taylor, 33, died in a head-on collision, thus earning a tie in the game of chicken they were playing with their
snowmobiles.


DARWIN AWARD HONORABLE MENTIONS

* In Guthrie, Okla, in October, Jason Heck tried to
kill a millipede with a shot from his 22 caliber
rifle, but the bullet ricocheted off a rock near the
hole and hit pal Antonio Martinez in the head,
fracturing his skull.


* In Elyria, Ohio, in October, Martyn Eskins,
attempting to clean out cobwebs in his basement,
declined to use a broom in favor of a propane torch
and caused a fire that burned the first and second
floors of his house.

* Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in Andover
Township, NJ, and his wife Bonnie was also injured,
when a quarter-stick of dynamite blew up in their
car. While driving around at 2 AM, the bored couple
lit the dynamite and tried to toss it out the window
to see what would happen, but apparently failed to
notice the window was closed.



RUNNER UP....

TACOMA, WA

Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 am. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a
bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. One end of the cable was secured around Bingham's leg and the other end was tied to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable
tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy river water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. "All I can say, " said Bingham, "is that God was watching out for me on that night." "There's just no other explanation for it." Bingham's foot was never located.


AND THE WINNER....

PADERBORN, GERMANY
Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt fed his constipated elephant Stefan 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally let it fly, and suffocated the keeper under 200 pounds of poop! Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46,was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded on him.
"The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant continued to evacuate
his bowels on top of him" said flabbergasted Paderborn police detective Erik Dern. 'with no one there to help him, he lay under all that dung for at least an hour before a watchman came along, and during that time he suffocated. It seems to be one of those freak accidents that "Manure happens."

 

Thanks Dennis.That last one really cracked me up. :-staun

 

Ah,yeah......thanks a lot Dennis....I think.

 

I don't think a person would be able to pay me enough to do that job. I still have standards.

 

everytime I read those each year, they get dumber and dumber. lol what are people thinking?? who drives around with dynamite in their car? lol weird people

 

Another Group of Darwin Award Contestant's

I thought Calgarians were above this kind of stuff, But I see it even resides in Calgary.

Day Care Darwin Dummies

 

I have always liked reading the darwin awards. Some of them you can tell they are false just by reading them. But they are funny.

 

If only I could get a quarter everytime someone mentions my last name....

 

This is a true story. i cut it from the local news web page. one of the 3 guys is a roomate of a guy i work with.
also if you check the jay leno archives, they were brought on his show last wednesday.... what a bunch of idiots.


Three streakers ran through a North Spokane Denny's restaurant early Wednesday morning. But soon, the tricksters got tricked.
Police say the young men paraded naked inside the restaurant at about 5am. The streakers thought ahead before they stripped -and left a getaway car with their clothes inside, running just outside. However, someone saw their car running, and stole it.

"It's likely that they were in the Denny's when these guys were streaking. They shot out, grabbed their car, and took off," said Lt. Gil Moberly, from the Spokane Police Department.

Police say the three streakers tried to hide in a nearby car lot once they lost their ride. They waited naked in the crisp morning air, until officers showed up and gave them blankets. Police could have charged the streakers with indecent exposure, but officers thought they learned their lesson.

T he streaker's blue 1988 Mazda 323 is still missing.

dont belive it... look for yourself