Barney: " Hey, Homer look someone spilled beer in the ashtray. (SLUUUURRRRRRRPPP)"

 

One word. "Excellent"

 

There was one with sigfried and roy and thier tiger was going after homer or something and homer says "oh no, a lion!" and then there was one where there was a family discussion going on and homer says "Marge..... please allow me to play devil's advocate" then it cuts to him playing a devils advocate pinball machine. damn, one of the best most clever shows ever.

 

Been on for what 15 years now. One of the best shows, most origanal, funny, and ingenious show ever. Im torn between The Simpsons or The Family Guy bein the funniest show. Both have their own style.

 

Dough, the stuff that buys me beer.
Ray, the guy who brings me beer.
Me, the guy who drinks the beer.
Far, a long way to get beer.
So, I'll have another beer.
La, I'll have another beer.
Tea, no thanks I'm having beer.
That will bring us back to...
...DOH!!!

 

King of the Hill is great too

Cotton Hill is one of my heros

 

Homer:
I am so smart, I am so smart, S-M-R-T.....I mean S-M-A-R-T............

 

Bart----"My names bart simpson who the hell are you"

 

Ya as he burns the house down hahaha


Theres so many I don't have a favorite.

Homer goes to get burns' mail......

Postman: OK mr burns what's your first name

Homer: Ummmm I don't know ....

 

Chief Wiggum: I'm gonna have to ticket you it seems that your tailight was shorting out when you went around that corner.

The warden after the prison rodeo: He painted a Unicorn in space, there is no air in space.
Homer: there's an air in space museum.

When homer turns the bacon grease in for money.
Clerk: that will be 74 cents.
Homer: you see that boy, 74 cents for grease.
Bart: but you wasted over 20 dollars worth of bacon.
Homer: That's were your wrong son, that was your mom's money.

 

It's not a line, but a scene.


Mr Burns talking to a bunch of lawers....

Burns..."I want your legal advice, I'll even pay for it. BUT TO ME YOUR ALL VIPERS! YOU LIVE ON PERSONAL INJURY! YOU LIVE ON HUMAN SUFFERING! YOU LIVE ON PAIN AND MISERY! ...But I'm rambling.....Want any coffee?"

Lawer... "I'll have come coffee."

Burns..."Want it black don't you? Black like you heart! IT'S SO HARD TO LISTEN TO YOU! I HATE YOU ALL SOOO MUCH!!! ...I'm sorry, It's my problem, I'll deal with it. Please continue."

Lawer..."If you offer him say $10,000 dollars, he will be so dazzled the he will sign anything you put in front of him"

Burns..."Oh brilliant. A cash settlement. I COULD HAVE FIGGURED THAT OUT YOU BUTTON DOWN MAGGOT!"

Lawer...."Do you have any cream?"

Burns..."Oh yes, of course. Where are my manners."

Just beautiful.

 

I like the episode where bart and milhouse break into the comic book geeks video library, and discover police confession videos

Flanders (on the tape): I dont want to be a tattle tale....but i think my neighbor let a radioactive ape loose in my house.

Bart: It wasnt dad's fault, the ape tricked him!

 

Agnes:"...and I know about cowards..."

Seymour:" I was in NAM mother"

Agnes:" its been 30 years and you're still whining about it"

 

BARNEY IN MOES TAVERN....THE EPISODE WHEN HOMER LOSES HIS LICENSE FOR DWI....
MO SAYS TO ALL THE PATRONS AT THE BAR (THIS IS AFTER HOMER LEAVES THE BAR TO HANG WITH HIS WIFE):
"YOU WILL ALL BE BACK YOU, YOU, AND YOU (POINTS TO BARNEY) AND BARNEY SAYS:
"OF COURSE I'LL BE BACK, IF YOU DIDN'T CLOSE, I'D NEVER LEAVE!!!" the demise of the usa..guess i'm part of it...

 

Homer, (I think just before he joins some angry mob): "There's a time for thinking and a time for action, and this ain't no time for thinking!"