Sorry, I couldn't think of a decent subject to bring up...
I was like, hey! 1 more post and I'm at 75! WOOOT!
So...lemme think...

Here's a joke...

One day this hillbilly named Ned was driving to search for a different bar. He eventually came up to this bar he had never been to before. He went in, called the bartender over, and order a beer. He noticed there was a jar full of 10 dollar bills sitting up on a counter. He asked the bartender, "What's that jar full of money doin' up there?" The bartender said, "There are 3 different tasks you have to complete. If you complete the tasks, you can have all the money in the jar, but it will cost you 10 bucks." So Ned says, "What do I have to do?" Bartender says, "You have to pay me first, then I'll tell you." So Ned pulls out 10 bucks and hands it to the bartender. "Here ya go!" Bartender tells him, "Ok, first you have to drink this 40 ounce bottle of XXX Moonshine in 3 minutes flat. Then, you have to go outside the door and pull a sore tooth from my bulldog. Then, you'll have to go upstairs and give this 90 year old woman an orgasm because she's never had one."

Ned was stunned...There's no way I'll be able to do all that he thought...

The night went on, and Ned had a few beers and became buzzed. All of a sudden Ned jumps up, grabs the XXX Moonshine and downs it in 2 minutes flat! Then, in a drunken rage, he bolts out the door. All the people in the bar listen as they here yelling, screaming, yelping, and nashing of teeth...then silence. Ned walks in bloody and bruised with his shirt torn to shreds and says, "OK! Now where's that old woman with the tooth?!"

 

The moonshine will do that to ya' !!

 

A leper walks into a bar, and sits down on a barstool, and orders a beer.
"Sure, man. I think I have some paper cups in the back, just a second." says the bartender, coughing, trying not to vomit.
The leper drinks his beer, and orders another one. When the bartender delivers it, he immediately throws up all over the bar.
"Oh, man! I am so sorry," says the leper, "I really should go."
"No, bro it's not you, you're fine," the bartender replies, "It's the drunk guy behind you dipping his chips in your neck!"
Yum.
BDV

 

Congrats on the 75,i can't believe i'm over a hundred!

 

You guys have a ways to go yet...

 

Hmmmmm......I believe I just felt a murmur in the force.

 

Dennis, you have WAY too many posts, share them out with the newbies..

 

Hey guys!
Wife comes in from the doctors and is just buzzin around the house in such a good mood!
Husband says, well, what did the doc have to say?
He said I have the br___ts of a 25 year old!
Husband, did he say anything about your fat a__?
Wife, No, your name never came up!!!
HEE HEE! (I hope I'm not in trouble)
Talk with you guys later....