General NON-Automotive Conversation No Political, Sexual or Religious topics please.

The Safe for GNAC Joke Thread!!!

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
  #9676  
Old 04-08-2024, 11:37 AM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait.
Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm.
The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm.

Feeling sorry for the little snake with no lunch, he snatched him up again and poured
a little beer down his throat. Then he went about his fishing.

An hour or so later the fisherman felt a tug at his pant leg. Looking down,
he sees the same snake with three more worms in his mouth...
__________________________________________________ ___

The Manager of a retail clothing store is reviewing a potential employee’s application and notices that the man has never worked in retail before. He says to the man, “For a man with no experience, you are certainly asking for a high wage.” “Well Sir,” the applicant replies, “the work is so much harder when you don’t know what you’re doing!"
__________________________________________________ ___

Guy goes to the police station to file a report on his missing wife. Man: "I lost my wife (Misty)" .... Inspector: "What is her height?" Guy: "I never noticed." Inspector: "Slim or healthy?"
Guy: "Not slim, can be healthy." Inspector: "Color of eyes?" Husband: "Never noticed." Inspector: "Color of hair?" Guy: "Changes according to season." Inspector: "What was she wearing?"
Husband, "I don't remember exactly." Inspector: "Was somebody with her?" Guy, "Yes my Labrador dog, Romeo, tied with a golden chain, height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue *****, he likes non veg food, we eat together, we jog together"... And the Guy started crying.
Inspector: "Lets search for the dog first."
________________________________________________


 
  #9677  
Old 04-09-2024, 05:16 AM
alloro's Avatar
alloro
alloro is online now
Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: 0,0,1
Posts: 23,582
Received 4,265 Likes on 2,489 Posts
  #9678  
Old 04-09-2024, 05:50 AM
BIGKEN's Avatar
BIGKEN
BIGKEN is offline
Moderator
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Greenfield, MA
Posts: 148,956
Received 7,479 Likes on 4,412 Posts



Yesterday's E-clips.
 
The following users liked this post:
  #9679  
Old 04-09-2024, 07:14 AM
06pghescape's Avatar
06pghescape
06pghescape is offline
Laughing Gas
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 1,108
Received 1,459 Likes on 541 Posts
The following users liked this post:
  #9680  
Old 04-09-2024, 12:08 PM
BIGKEN's Avatar
BIGKEN
BIGKEN is offline
Moderator
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Greenfield, MA
Posts: 148,956
Received 7,479 Likes on 4,412 Posts
The following 2 users liked this post by BIGKEN:
  #9681  
Old 04-09-2024, 12:14 PM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
  #9682  
Old 04-09-2024, 01:51 PM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
Why did the dad cross the road? To get to the dad joke convention on the other side.
 
  #9683  
Old 04-09-2024, 02:08 PM
BIGKEN's Avatar
BIGKEN
BIGKEN is offline
Moderator
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Greenfield, MA
Posts: 148,956
Received 7,479 Likes on 4,412 Posts
The following users liked this post:
  #9684  
Old 04-09-2024, 06:02 PM
BIGKEN's Avatar
BIGKEN
BIGKEN is offline
Moderator
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Greenfield, MA
Posts: 148,956
Received 7,479 Likes on 4,412 Posts
The following users liked this post:
  #9685  
Old 04-09-2024, 06:49 PM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
"You think swimming with sharks is expensive? "I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."
Low bow and Exit quickly Mr.!
__________________________________________

Why are spiders so smart? They can find everything on the web. ... Which is faster, hot or cold? ... Hot, because you can catch a cold. ... We don't have a Helicopter either.
__________________________________________________ ___


I took some time to think about the accusations and said just stuff em! So, Find another toy and play with it ?
 
  #9686  
Old 04-09-2024, 08:18 PM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
He rode in on a great Horse, a good steed, dependable ride!
 
  #9687  
Old 04-10-2024, 08:01 AM
alloro's Avatar
alloro
alloro is online now
Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: 0,0,1
Posts: 23,582
Received 4,265 Likes on 2,489 Posts
Some days, I can relate...


 
The following users liked this post:
  #9688  
Old 04-10-2024, 09:16 AM
BassFantasizer's Avatar
BassFantasizer
BassFantasizer is offline
Hotshot
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 11,770
Received 4,815 Likes on 2,676 Posts
Speaking of relating....



 
The following 2 users liked this post by BassFantasizer:
  #9689  
Old 04-10-2024, 10:42 AM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
The number twelve walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a pint of beer. "Sorry I can't serve you," says the bartender.
"Why not?!" asks the number twelve with anger showing in its voice. "You're under 18," replies the barman.
__________________________________________________ _____

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.
"Now, class, closely observe the worms," said the professor while putting a worm into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.

He then put the second worm into the whiskey. It curled up and writhed about painfully, then quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
"Now, what lesson can we learn from this experiment?" the professor asked.

Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded confidently, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms."
________________________________________________





 
The following users liked this post:
  #9690  
Old 04-10-2024, 03:15 PM
Papa Tiger's Avatar
Papa Tiger
Papa Tiger is offline
Fleet Owner
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 23,128
Received 3,456 Likes on 2,366 Posts
Honey are you ready, yea, shoot! Johnny's back ! I’m Waiting ?
Heck its a Bananna !
__________________________________________________ _____
 


Quick Reply: The Safe for GNAC Joke Thread!!!



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:33 AM.