A Texas Farmer and his Divorce:


A Texas farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce.
The attorney asked, "May I help you?"
The farmer said, "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorce's."
The attorney said, "well do you have any grounds?"
The farmer said, "Yea, I got about 140 acres."
The attorney said, " No, you don't understand, do you have a case?"
The farmer said, "No, I don't have a Case, but I have a John Deere."
The attorney said, "No you don't understand, I mean do you have a grudge?"
The farmer said, "Yea I got a grudge, that's where I park my John
Deere."
The attorney said, "No sir, I mean do you have a suit?"
The farmer said, "Yes sir, I got a suit. I wear it to church on Sundays."
The exasperated attorney said, "Well sir, does your wife beat you up or anything?"
The farmer said, "No sir, we both get up about 4:30."
Finally, the attorney says, "Okay, let me put it this way. "WHY DO
YOU WANT A DIVORCE?"
And the farmer says, "Well, I can never have a meaningful conversation with her."

 

LOLOLOL That's a good one. I think I need to send that to my mom!

Thanx!
Connie (only Ford luvr in the family!)

'79 f100 "Silver Ghost" (my baby)
'83 f100 "The Ford" (my first)
'85 f150 "Old Blue" (my next project)

 

Hey Connie (by the way, yall can call my Bryan) if you like that one you ought to go to KFAN's web site. Go to where it says 'Texas Jokes', they got a bunch of em.

http://www.texasrebelradio.com/

 

Well thank you Brian and I'm checking out that link right now.

Thanx!
Connie (only Ford luvr in the family!)

'79 f100 "Silver Ghost" (my baby)
'83 f100 "The Ford" (my first)
'85 f150 "Old Blue" (my next project)

 

Tornadoes and Texans going through a divorce have a lot in common. In either case, you know someone is going to lose a trailer.

 

Josh, You should check out that site. I started 3 days ago and I still haven't finished but I've sent plenty of them to my family and friends...

Gotta give it two thumbs up Brian! THANX!!!!

Sometimes all you need to lighten a bad day, is a good joke.

Thanx!
Connie (only Ford luvr in the family!)

'79 f100 "Silver Ghost" (my baby)
'83 f100 "The Ford" (my first)
'85 f150 "Old Blue" (my next project)

 

Yes'm, your quite welcome. I spend too much time on that site reading their jokes and all. But I'd rather be listning to their station. I wish they still brodcasted over the internet. They arent more than 30 miles from my house, but with the hills and all I cant bairly pick them up.

 

So far, I'm at the very bottom of page one but then, I haven't spent much time reading today. I had a very long, very serious email to send. My favorite radio station, 96.3 KLLL, used to broadcast on the net because I remember the ads but when I got net access and was able to listen to net radio, they had already had to stop because it cost them too much. When I emailed one of the dj's, they told me that and that they hoped to have it up and running someday again but they weren't for sure. I hate to see that inet radio is being shut down like they shut down napster. I was a big nap user until they shut it down. Now I'm on KazAa all the time. At least this way I can burn cd's but doesn't do me any good, I don't have a cd player in my truck...LOL! Workin' on it though...Hey, if you want to chat, you can email me or whatever. I've got aim...feel free guys...

Thanx!
Connie (only Ford luvr in the family!)

'79 f100 "Silver Ghost" (my baby)
'83 f100 "The Ford" (my first)
'85 f150 "Old Blue" (my next project)

 

I totally forgot about that website. I found it about 6 months ago and read'em all then but I forgot most of them, I'll have to refresh my memory.

95.3 KHYI out of Dallas (http://www.khyi.com/) used to have play alot of good music on the net but I haven't able to get it to work lately.

 

I think KVET 98.1 in Austin still plays on the net. Not sure though. IT's a good country channel. For a big town like Austin, they play pretty good music. But I prefer the small town channels that still play 'real' country.

 

I've got KazAa now so I don't use the internet radio anymore. I've got a pretty good collection going right now and more of them on the way. The only problem with that is it slows me down sooo much that it makes it hard to get these forums to work. Oh well... priorities I guess. I had to turn KazAa off so I could see what everyone's up to.

Thanx!
Connie (only Ford luvr in the family!)

'79 f100 "Silver Ghost" (my baby)
'83 f100 "The Ford" (my first)
'85 f150 "Old Blue" (my next project)

 

What's KazAa?

 

Due to the popularity of the Survivor shows, Texas is planning to do its own, entitled "Survivor-Texas Style".
The contestants will start in Dallas, travel to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, over to Houston and down to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, on to El Paso, then to Midland, Odessa, Lubbock, and Amarillo. From there, they'll proceed to Abilene, Ft. Worth, and finally back to Dallas.
Each will be driving a pink Volvo with a bumper sticker that reads: "I'm gay, I'm a vegetarian, I voted for Al Gore, George Strait Sucks, Hillary in 2004, and I'm here to confiscate your guns!"
The first one that makes it back to Dallas alive, wins.

 

 

That was one of the best ones. It's probably true too. I think I'm going to send the blueneck one to Jeff Foxworthy becuz he always does the redneck stuff on his countdowns on Saturday nights. I'll give him a change of pace and see if it ever comes out on the radio. Who knows what they'll come up with next right?

Thanx!
Connie (only Ford luvr in the family!)

'79 f100 "Silver Ghost" (my baby)
'83 f100 "The Ford" (my first)
'85 f150 "Old Blue" (my next project)