I agree with you on those points. I guess my experience has been primarily with the transients. The kids in situations like you girlfriend's, are handled by Social Services and are usually placed with relatives or foster care here so our involvement with them is usually minimal. The transients I deal with are adults and most have a choice.

 

Absolutely, most of those guys thumbin for rides or hangin out on the corners beggin have made that choice. Mostly due to drugs and alcohol! I make it a habit to NEVER give a handout to someone on the streets because im pretty sure 2% of the money goes towards food or somewhere to stay and 98% will be spent either on drugs or booze. Case in point; my gf and one of her friends and her husband were with us in downtown chicago and we pass a bum beggin for money. They got mad at me for just walking past him and not giving him some money. They gave him 20 bucks each!!! and he just happened to be begging in front of a LIQUOR STORE!! We waited and watched him go in and come out with a couple brown bags that definately did not have food or necessities in them! I had a great time with the "told ya so's" in the car on the way home.

 

I see many of the same people begging at the intersections all over Boston. I've noticed that many of the signs are all on nice clean cardboard and have the same nice, neat handwriting. I also notice that the same people tend to rotate around the various intersections. Makes me a little cynical as to their situation. One woman was "pregnant/drugfree/homeless" for at least two years.....she never did look pregnant although she did appear to be well-fed.

 

18 and kicked out?...........Walk on down to the recruiters office, they will find her a new home.

 

I can't say that I agree with a flat rule of 18 and you're gone. With us it was if you are going to school and keeping your grades up, working and following our rules then you are OK. If you don't then you need to find your own place.
Any more even a recruiting center doesn't mean that you will get in. There are many that want in now that the economy is down and so the services can pick and chose. Not all people are on the streets by choice. Some have mental problems that don't get addressed and if you are homeless and don't have a address it is kind of hard to get somebody to talk to you about a job. I agree that I don't usually give handouts simply because you can't tell just by looking who is in need and who isn't. It is better to help or donate to the different homeless shelters that work with them.

 

I have grown cynical in a lot of ways as I got older and I handle things different. I know it isn't a "religion" thing mine is actually a Christian thing which is different but If I see someone I am COMFORTABLE with helping out I will. If I am not comfortable I stop pray that god will meet the need they have they way he feels it is supposed to be and that the person will be looked over.
here at the motel I always refer back to Mary and Joseph..."No room at the Inn" I have a personal weight on my heart to never turn anyone away. Now I will not knowingly let a sex offender stay or someone just getting out on burglary because I do have other guests to think of. But if the police, troopers, sheriff call and say they found someone sleeping in the bushes (and they do run checks for me just to be on safe side) I tell them to bring them on. My life has been more blessed by the ones without the kewl cars, nice clothes etc. They have something that just gets in my soul. I will feed them clothes them whatever they need. Some just need a hug. Some just need to tell their story. I have been taken advantage of I will admit that but that is between them and someone else. I have done what has been put on my heart to do. I guess everyone should do the same. I guess it is the roadside panderers that often bug me. Here an excerpt from a great article on the subject.
I bet this won't surprise you, but estimates vary. As Michael S. Scott, the director of the Center for Problem-Oriented Policing, says in his online article "Panhandling":

Estimates vary from a couple of dollars (U.S.) a day on the low end, to $20 to $50 a day in the mid-range, to about $300 a day on the high end. Women, especially those who have children with them, and panhandlers who appear to be disabled tend to receive more money. For this reason, some panhandlers pretend to be disabled and/or war veterans. Others use pets as a means of evoking sympathy from passersby. Panhandlers' regular donors can account for up to half their receipts.

In a study of Toronto panhandlers conducted by Robit Bose and Stephen Hwang, panhandlers reported a median monthly income equivalent to US $190-$200. The authors note that

a journalist who briefly lived on the street in Toronto working as a panhandler . . . reported that panhandlers can earn more than $200 per day . . . These differences may be partly explained by the fact that high-earning panhandlers were presumably less likely to participate in our survey, and these individuals may have formed the basis for Stackhouse's observations. Our results may be more representative of the majority of panhandlers who earn lesser amounts.

 

I always used to dislike seeing someone bumming in a field jacket trying to pass themselves off as a vet. Before the first gulf war the only vets that were not already old men were the Vietnam vets. I was young enough that the draft was suspended before my 18th birthday. To see these guys that were obviously my junior passing themselves off as Vietnam veterans turned my stomach.

 

their are times I wonder what would my life have been like if I had been able to join the armed forces and learned disapiln ,and the meaning of the armed forces..or was it just the way things were supposed to be??

 

My wife got mad at me once for not giving money to a guy thats been begging for years. Two days later we were at a gas station and someone gave him some money and he ran through the door yelling " Wheres the beer?".

 

if someone begs for money and you give it to them it's their money. If they buy food or booze it makes no difference. beggers live and die on the streets. if they came into money it would only kill them sooner. money dont fix the lost soul.

 

So true.
............

 

I moved out of home at 15, and I didnt have to once beg for money, and I got my high school education, and I even managed to have a vehicle. That was the hardest part, going to school and trying to earn money to live. I had alot of days when i only ate one small "meal" a day just cause thats all could afford.

Not like i was a saint back then either though, but Im just saying that its possible to do without having to beg. I did it when i was 15, 18 would have been a blessing for me!

 

Many, many years ago when my dad was in high school, he went to school during the day, came home and slept, and then went to work in the coal mines on night shift. His dad died when my dad was 16. My grandmother had a job but my aunt was trying to go to college and couldn't afford to pay her tuition. My dad filled out an application for the mines and put down a fake date of birth to show he was 18. My grandmother was always in the bed by about 8 PM so Dad would get up, sneak out, and go to work in the mines. He said he did it so my aunt could afford to go to school and they'd have food to eat. He made it about two weeks before my grandmother caught on. After that, she let him keep working because with my grandfather gone, they didn't have much choice. They did what they had to do to survive.

 

And we think we have it tough these days eh John!

 

You are exactly right Sheldon! I always liked to listen to my dad's stories about working the mines. It takes someone with nerves of steel. Needless to say, I had a great example early on when it came to work ethic.