So we have all said something that slipped past the old "brain filter".

I once asked asked a lady when she was due.... and she wasn't pregnant.

I heard somone in the dorm talk about this wild married chick he got drunk and slept with... with the woman in questions husband in the next booth at the chow hall.

I heard of a boss that was at a party for people who where getting laid off and he said "This is great we should do this more often." To wich the room got really quiet.

Duane was talking about theft at a grocery store and said" "80% of shrinkage is internal" To wich the whole room busted up laughing, after a moment of silence.

So... give us a non filtered moment.....

 

I have a friend that I grew up with, and have alot of respect for, and was always a blast to hang around, but it seems like everytime I am around him, or have a conversation with him my filter just shuts off, I say insulting things, that I try to pass off as jokes, I make poor remarks, and poor timing.
It's kind of a weird phenomenom, he used to be my best friend, but things I have said when my filter was abscent, has driven him to think I am a real Jerk.

May be that he lost his sense of humor, but I bet it is just my poor judgment in conversation with him.

For instance, I hadn't heard from him in a long time, one day he calls, and informs me that one of our classmates had died in a motorcycle wreck. (the one who passed away was one I wasn't very close to but he was) My response was "I guess it was his destiny"
That didn't settle well with my friend.
It was insensitive, and I could tell by the way the conversation come to a stop, that he was deeply hurt by what I said.
Ever since then when I bump into him, I seem to make the same mistake.. Its weird...
I hate it, because I would really like to be close friends with him again.

History behind it, when the one that passed away moved to Jewell, he brought a stolen motorcycle with him, that he told his parents (preachers) that he was keeping for a friend because they didn't have a garage. After school started, he wrecked it (bad) and didn't call the police, someone called in an accident, and the police found him in the garage using a torch to cut up the bike, to dispose of it.

I know.. not funny, but feels better to get it off my chest.

 

Not necessarily a filter moment, but think this post needs some brightening up now that I darkened it..

about three weeks ago we had a substitute mail carrier. he drove in our driveway, and in an effort to get turned around backed over our mailbox..
He felt really bad about it and came back several times to offer to pay for the damage, and/or fix it.
I thought that was might nice of him.
He brought back the hardware to fix it on a Friday, and worked for quite a wile on it. I had just gotten back from a B double E double R U N, so I took both of them out a Beer,
They both hesitated until I opened them up and handed them to them.

Then once they were both holding the beers, and the mail box up, I asked if I could take a picture to show their boss. LOL!!!

 

The wife and I were wrestling on the sofa one night and I INTENDED to say "get off of me you horn dog" but unfortunatley the "n dog" didn't make it out of my mouth so all that was said was "get off of me you #%&" !!! I used to worry about someone hurting my wife but ever since that day I want her on my side should I ever stumble into a bar brawl lol!

Took lots of chocolate and flowers to make up for that one!

More recently on our way thru Oklahoma City, The MIL was in the truck with us and I was doing about 80 to keep up with traffic and the MIL mouths off and says "you need to slow down, just cuz everyone else is blah blah blah" and I said "You can walk but it's only a four lane so you won't have much room to manuver" hehehe

 

Apparently, my filter was taking a vacation today.. guess I may have to buy flowers for the wife..

The wife went to get a hair cut, which I thought might be just a small trim, which I have been told time and time again is just a way to keep split ends from happening, but everytime it keeps getting shorter, and shorter and shorter. I like women with long hair, and she used to have long pretty hair, so this was disturbing for me, and I guess I must have been in a bad mood, cause I let it fly.
My comment was.. " Well Sinead... I guess it is a good thing we got pictures for the year out of the way.."

OOOOPS.... I wonder if I should even go home after work...

Of course I called a friend and told him what I had done.. and that I felt bad, and he immediately volunteered to go console her, and asked if he should take chocolates..

Not sure his filter was working either... LOL!!

 

You mean you didn't say, "With hair that short you could be my brother!" Too bad the weather is getting colder, because where you sleep may be colder too. Of course there is always Riley to keep you warm. Bark Bark, LOL

 

Well, lucky enough the flowers were enough, I didn't need any chocolates. I don't know if it was enough to get me back up over the hill, but at least I am not 7 feet under..

While standing in the checkout line, a guy walks up and says, "either youre in the dog house, or a romantic. "

I responded by saying..

"I may or may not have alledgedly, said something to my wife that may or may not have been taken in a negative way, but the jury is still out on that one!"

The guy just stood there in a daze for a second then started to get a small smile, then a little chuckle, soon he burst into a full out BWAAAAAHaaaahaaaa and tears started coming from his eyes. His gears must turn slowly, because it took a long time from point A to point B.

 

My wife, my youngest son and myself were all watching the tube one night, it was one of those real life ER shows. Anyways, a patient came in that immediatly caught my attention. Apperantly he was trimming trees and while on a ladder he fell right on top of another tree and........you guessed it, the tree went right up the ol' pooper !!!!!!

They had to cut the branch off and bring him in with about 2' of the tree still protruding from his butt!! While I was in shock Benny says "he must be related to Jose Jalepeno........on a steeeeek" I burst out laughing so hard I almost pee'd myself and he followed up with " it might have been a pogo stick accident...boing....boing....boing......OLAY!!"

 

Well I have often heard the phase he/she needs to remove the stick in their butt... Guess this guy went through with it.

 

Yup, they got it dislodged and I told the MIL to pay close attention to how it was done :-)

 

Probably got a redwood you can drive through up there!!!!!!!

 

Thats disturbing.. How do you know its a redwood?

 

WOW did I come up for a response for that but it wasn't even R rated...

Number 2 choice for response... because ifit was cedar she would smell nice.... it's definately not cedar.

 

ROFL !!!!!!!!

 

I just went to a good friend's sister's wedding. This is her 3rd time getting married now. I don't even remember what we were talking about, but TWICE that night I said something along the lines of oh well, there's always next time. I wasn't even trying to be funny or anything, just needed to replace the filter apparently.