thinking about the weekend and doing some fishing, cant get here fast enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!

 

Hi Paul,
hows the weather down there today?

 

 

NEVER ARGUE WITH A WOMAN

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing
and decides to take a nap.
Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to
take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors,
and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside
the woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?'
'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?')
'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her
'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'
'Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could
start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'
" For reading a book," she replies,
'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her again,

'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with Sexual assault,'
says the woman.
'But I haven't even touched you,' says the game warden.
'That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know
you could start at any moment.'
'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can
also think.

 

Morning sunshiners...

 

Afternoon Phill and all......

 

Howdy Donnie.

 

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick.
His wife Marsha has long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day,
John came home about noon and told Marsha that he had gone to a nearby city
and purchased a Robot. It was no ordinary robot, but it was in fact a Lie
Detector. He said it had to charge 4 or 5 hours, and then he would show her
how it worked. At 5:30 that afternoon, Tommy, their 11 year old son, came in
from school, nearly 2 hours and 15 minutes late. Both parents were
understandably angry. 'Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late
getting home?', they asked. 'Several of us went to the library to work on an
extra credit project,' said Tommy.

The Robot walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely
out of his chair.

'Son, this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you went after
school.'

'We went to Bobby's house and watched a mov ie.' 'What did you watch?', asked
Marsha. 'The Ten Commandments.' The Robot went around to Tommy and once
again slapped him, knocking him off his chair. With lip quivering, Tommy got
up, sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called
Sex Queen.' 'I'm ashamed of you Son,' said John. 'When I was your age, I
never lied to my parents, never tried to see dirty pictures much less dirty
movies, told dirty jokes, nor did I misbehave.'

The robot walked around to John and delivered a roundhouse right that not
only knocked him out of his chair, but out the back door and half way across
the patio.

When he came back inside, Marsha was bent double laughing, almost in tears.
'Boy, did you ever ask for that one! And you can't be too mad with Tommy.
After all, He is your son!'

The Robot immediately walked around to Marsha, and literally slapped the
**** out of her, not once, but three times.

 

 

 

 

 

My Next Life:


I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that
out of the way.



Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every
day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. Enjoy your retirement
and collect your pension.

Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on
your first day. You work 40 years until you're too young to work. You get
ready for High School: drink alcohol, party,and you're generally
promiscuous.



Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and
you have no responsibilities.



Then you become a baby, and then... You spend
your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in Spa-like conditions -
central heating, room service on tap, and then... You finish off as an
Orgasm



I rest my case...............