<tt>Sorry about the screwed up ness... i got it in an email

>>>> Subject: Pets
>>>>>>>>> > To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door -- nose
>>>>>>>>>height:
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > Dear Dogs and Cats, The dishes with the paw print are
>>>>>>>>>yours and
>>>>>>>>> > contain your food. The other dishes are mine and
>>>>>>>>>contain my food.
>>>>>>>>> > Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my
>>>>>>>>>plate and
>>>>>food
>>>>>>>>> > does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and
>>>>>>>>>dish, nor do
>>>>>I
>>>>>>>>> > find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a
>>>>>>>>>racetrack.
>>>>>>>>> > Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me
>>>>>>>>>doesn't
>>>>>>>>>help
>>>>>>>>> > because I fall faster than you can run.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > I cannot buy anything bigger than a king-sized bed. I
>>>>>>>>>am very
>>>>>sorry
>>>>>>>>> > about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on
>>>>>>>>>the couch to
>>>>>>>>> > ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up
>>>>>>>>>in a ball
>>>>>>>>>when
>>>>>>>>> > they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular
>>>>>>>>>to each
>>>>>>>>>other
>>>>>>>>> > stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also
>>>>>>>>>know that
>>>>>>>>> > sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging
>>>>>>>>>out the
>>>>>>>>>other
>>>>>>>>> > end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the
>>>>>>>>>bathroom.
>>>>>If
>>>>>>>>>by
>>>>>>>>> > some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the
>>>>>>>>>door shut, it
>>>>>>>>>is
>>>>>>>>> > not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the
>>>>>>>>>**** or get
>>>>>>>>>your
>>>>>>>>> > paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I
>>>>>>>>>must exit
>>>>>>>>>through
>>>>>>>>> > the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the
>>>>>>>>>bathroom for
>>>>>>>>> > years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the
>>>>>>>>>following message
>>>>>on
>>>>>>>>> > our front door.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain
>>>>>>>>>About Our Pets:
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > 1. They live here. You don't.
>>>>>>>>> > 2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay
>>>>>>>>>off the
>>>>>>>>> > furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
>>>>>>>>> > 3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
>>>>>>>>> > 4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted
>>>>>son/daughter
>>>>>>>>> > who> is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't
>>>>>>>>>speak
>>>>>clearly.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than
>>>>>>>>>kids because
>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>they:
>>>>>>>>> > 1. Eat less
>>>>>>>>> > 2. Don't ask for money all the time
>>>>>>>>> > 3 Are easier to train
>>>>>>>>> > 4. Normally come when called
>>>>>>>>> > 5. Never ask to drive the car
>>>>>>>>> > 6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
>>>>>>>>> > 7. Don't smoke or drink
>>>>>>>>> > 8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
>>>>>>>>> > 9. Don't want to wear your clothes
>>>>>>>>> > 10. Don't need a "gazillion" dollars for college.
>>>>>>>>> >
>>>>>>>>> > And finally,
>>>>>>>>> > 11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their
>>>>>>>>>children.
>>>>>>>>>
>>
</tt>

 

Good one and true in many ways Kirk.

 

lol...you mean we can't sell our kids when we have 'em??? good one there 93!! i know we love our mutts!!!

here's my 2 mutts...anyone else??

 

Good one