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Is the actual trailer weight that can be towed (12,000#) - (actual van weight)?
Also, Ford doesn't by chance hide a brake controller somewhere in the vehicle do they? If they don't, do they have the brake wire up behind the console somewhere?
You are right. Your towing capacity is the 12,000 less the fully loaded weight of your van including all passengers and supplies that you may have on board while towing.
Ford doesn't have brake controllers as standard equipment. They are an option on super Dutys starting in 2005. For my controller, I bought the pigtail from camping world that let me plug my controller right in under the dash.