Hey everyone, what is the funniest thing that has happened to you while on the road?

Here is mine: Me and my friends were in my truck at a stop light when this old car pulls up with hydrolics. They start tryin to show out and impress us by bouncin the ugly thing...Well I (I always have sumthin smart to say) yell out my window "too bad ya drive a peice of crap." The guys reply with "like yo mama" then guess what happens.....their car broke down in the middle of the stop light! haha...I call it like I see it!

Gig'em

 

I was at stoplight in Redmond, WA a couple months ago behind a red lowered honda with the big wing on the back and the beehive exhaust. Now one of the few things I appreciate about rice is that they generally get moving in a hurry and don't hold up traffic by being slow. This was not the case however, as with the road construction going on in the area, the road was higher on our side of the intersection than the other, and there was about an inch step down in the middle, where the new pavement hadn't been laid yet. When the light turned green, the honda punched it out of the stop, and then came to almost a dead stop in the middle of the intersection as he tried to go DIAGONALLY down this step at about 2 mph. His efforts didn't pay off though and he still ended up dragging his coffee can on the step. I hollared out the window for him to move his junky import out of my way and got on the horn. He decided to take my advice and get moving but I quickly overtook him having merged into the other lane. Seeing me coming, I heard him rev his little engine up to try to stay in front of me. As I passed him he started to stick his middle finger out the window and opened his mouth to say something but stopped short when I just pointed at him and shook my head and mouthed "Uh-uh." I guess he realized 150 lbs off scrawny white guy in a honda was not a good mix with 210 lbs of mad mountain man lookin' dude in 3 tons of steel.

The Law

 

 

[updated:LAST EDITED ON 02-Apr-02 AT 01:06 AM (EST)]Years ago I was sitting at a stop light in the left turn lane on a local highway when suddenly there was a fairly large explosion in the back of my 74 F250. All I saw in my mirror was a snow shovel in the back of my truck flying up in the air. Not knowing what was going on at the time my reaction was to lay down on the seat. After getting up some nerve I sat up again only to see two of my buddies in a car going down the highway just past me. Thinking that they had something to do with the explosion I made a quick stop at the store and got back on the highway going the way that they were. About a mile up the road I saw there car sitting in the median of the highway with smoke rolling out of it. I stopped to what was going on and about peed my pants when I heard this. They were throwing M-80s out the car window into the back of pickups (as they did to me) when one of them hit roof line and fell back into the car and landed on the seat right between Tim's legs.

Neadless to say there was not much left of the car seat but thankfully they were able to bail out before the thing went off.

 

Here is something I found someplace, which was found someplace else, I DIDN'T WRITE IT, but is is funny! (if you are offended by foul language, DONT READ THIS!)

Here it goes;

Okay, I just spent 2 hours driving into work. This drive is normally 45 minutes. I am in North Carolina, NOT the ICE CAPITAL of the world, far from it, but holy bat I had to navigate has given me a multiple aneurysm headache.


I live back in the sticks, on a long windy tree lined road. It is 5 miles ionto town, and the "main roads". So I set off and notice how shiny the roads are, shiny white, that’s right I am driving on a ice rink, I mean a nice glaze of 1 inch thick ice. It had just started to melt so it had that EXTRA coating of slippery watery ice death glaze 5000.




pipe. Apparently 40 inch rims made from tin foil and low profile tires. One of those big stickers which obscures more than half the windshield which read N I S S A N. Ground effects which gave about .00025 inches clearance.



So the road was clear, he decides to pass. I hear the ricer motor turning for all its worth and this is driving for all he’s worth as the car is swerving badly due to . I just stop, I AM NOT getting killed cause Ricey McRicerton wanted to get to his job at
He goes on, end of the car swerving, he was all over the road.

So I resume, and driving very carefully, a car passes me going the opposite way flashing its lights.

Ahead was ONE of the very bad curves, a curve with a slight bank to it, as I approach I see Riceys firmly wrapped around a tree, and a Ford F350 Dually on the opposite side of the road.

Ground effects and $#!+ box pieces lay strewn everywhere.

Ricey had met the dually and panicked swerved, and the dually broadsided him, knocking him into a

As I got closer I saw some people standing around.......IT GETS BETTER.





Passers by had stop to help, but the redneck was taking matters into his own hands.

As I drove slowly by, I tooted the horn and waved.

I was so happy, justice was being served, one kick to the @$$ at a time.

Now it took me 2 hours to get to work there were many things I saw, so I will address them now.

----

DRIVER.

1. Okay, it snowed, and you need to drive your vehicle, if it is parked outside in the elements, CLEAN THE SNOW OFF YOUR VEHICLE!!!

While you may think its cool to clear a "peephole" and just get in and drive your "armored car" snow wagon, this reduces YOUR visability, and the spy hunter snow screen blowing off your fcar is hazardous to OTHER drivers as well.
(David Bowman insert picture here)

3. SUV/4 wheel drive vehicles ON ICE.

IT DOES NOT MATTER IF YOU HAVE 50 WHEEL DRIVE, UNLESS YOU HAVE STEEL STUDDED TIRES YOUR GEO TRACKER WILL GO INTO THE DITCH JUST AS WELL AND FAST AS A CAVALIER WILL, EXCEPT WITH *2OF YOUR WHEELS SPINNING MAKING YOUR HOUSE.

Drive like you have some sense, you DO NOT own the godd*mn road and your precious 4 wheel drive is useless on ice, the only thing it can do is MAYBE get you OUT of the ditch after you go in. So drive like you have some sense.

*
unless you are in a pre 80s 4x4, or some whooptee do 4x4, the differential only gives power to wheels that are spinning, or dont have traction, so its like this, in 4 wheel drive under optimal conditions 4 wheels turn, BUT then on ICE lets say 2 wheels loose traction, the wheels WITH traction stop spinning letting the tires with NO traction spin, so when you loose control, and youre in 4 wheel drive, you have 2 wheels spinning. There are things called LOCKERS which would fix this but chances are you dont have one and your already in the godd*mn ditch.

Nice form Earnhardt, your landing SUCKED. I give it a 3.

3. PULLING OUNT IN FRONT OF VEHICLES IN MOTION.

you do NOT DO THAT.

While you may be in a hurry to purchase 3 gallons of milk and 23 loaves of bread, please wait until the car moving down the road p@$$es, you pulling out in front of them is @brained at best, and if the car applies its brakes you’ll just have a big hunk of steel and glass, SLIDING into you instead of ROLLING into you. BE PATIENT, ice , itIf you would just follow these 3 little tips there wouldn’t be all the ups that there have been. In North Carolina there were nearly 1500 wrecks and 10 deaths, all because of
---

Associated things with bad weather.

WHAT IN THE ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH MILK AND BREAD.

As soon as snow is mentioned all stores sell out all milk and bread. WHY? I would think booze, pizza, junk food and rubbers would be the priorities, but hell I'm silly like that.

Hopefully you'll take something from this thread, if you have tips, post them here as well, maybe NEXT TIME YOU can PREVENT a wintery UP.

This message has been brought to you courtesy of the betteryou bureau and Ice Hat prevention society.

***END OF PLAGERISIM***

Tony

'74 F250. 460, "beater"
'73 F250, "midnight auto" now a trailer
'77 F250, 460 transplantee, "Flamer"

edited for content

 

Masterbeavis, I know what you're talking about. One day this past January, I was driving home amidst an ice storm. I switched to 4WD High in my Explorer and went slowly the whole way home and didn't have a problem. However, several times, I was passed. :-X23 Once buy a ricer and another time by a Grand Cherokee. I'm suprised they didn't end up in the ditch. I did later find a different ricer in the ditch, though. The problem is that people think they are invincible in their 4X4's. You definately have a traction advantage but can still end up in the ditch just as easily as any other vehicle. Like your post said, driver sensibly!

 

What planet do those people who think 4x4 makes it ok to drive like you're on dry pavement? You can accelerate better than 2wd but that's about it, you still need to steer and you still need to stop and 4x4 doesn't help much there.