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  #1  
Old 10-30-2003, 06:52 PM
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Redneck Girls and Trucks

(Other Bower here)
I was thinking about this all day, then I get home and find a bunch of redneck threads already. One more for the list!

Redneck Girls and trucks go way back. If you are a guy who owns a truck there are a few things to be prepared for.

*A redneck girl will judge you on your truck. If she likes it she may go out with you. If she doesn't, none of her friends will go out with you either.

*A redneck girl will never open the passenger door. She will climb in the driver's side and slide over to the middle, so she can sit next to you.

*A redneck girl will not sit next to the passenger window unless she is 1) mad at you, 2) drunk and needs to hang her head out, 3) holding the spotlight while you drive, or 4) flashing truckers.

*If you want something out of the cooler in the back, a redneck girl will climb through the sliding window to get it for you so you don't have to pull over.

*If you are out for a drive and get lost, a redneck girl won't mind. She will see it as an adventure and enjoy the change of scenery. If however you are late getting somewhere because you got lost, she will insist on driving every time you go there again.

*A redneck girl has no problem changing clothes while you drive. You may nearly wreck your truck the first time she does this, especially if it's the first date, so be prepared. Don't stare too hard.

*A redneck girl will point out other nice-looking trucks to you. If one is for sale, she won't mind if you turn around and go back for a closer look.

*A redneck girl will always ask before she fiddles with your CB. However if a good song comes on the radio, she will crank it without warning.

*A redneck girl will help you load your deer into the truck. She will cook it for you and help you eat it too.

*A redneck girl will buy you truck stuff for Christmas. Have a list ready.

*A "Southern" redneck girl will try to drive and eat boiled peanuts at the same time. DO NOT let this happen, if you see her with a bag of peanuts take her keys away or be prepared to see the trees and oncoming traffic up close while she steers with one knee.

*On summer drives a redneck girl will hang her bare feet out the window. She may even sunbathe in the back of the truck as you cruise down the highway. Turn your rearview mirror to one side to avoid distraction. Wave when the truckers honk.

*A redneck girl does not need a step to get into your truck, no matter how high it is. She knows you will give her a boost if she wants one. If she's wearing a skirt she expects you to look up it, she will wear sexy undies (or none at all) just for that reason.

*A redneck girl will help you fix your truck, or let you borrow hers if need be. Don't ask to borrow tools until the second or third date though.

*If you hit an animal, a redneck girl will want you to go back and run over it again to make sure it doesn't suffer.

I are a redneck girl! Enough for now...
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Last edited by 2Bowers; 10-30-2003 at 07:05 PM.
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  #2  
Old 10-30-2003, 06:59 PM
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TheWiz427 TheWiz427 is offline
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Ain't that the truth! Click the image to open in full size.
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Old 10-30-2003, 07:21 PM
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I got me one!
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Old 10-30-2003, 07:56 PM
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i envy the guys who have a redneck g/f...my ex wasnt ne of those cept for she did sit next to me. i wish i had me a redneck g/f
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Old 10-30-2003, 07:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by wezol5484
i envy the guys who have a redneck g/f...my ex wasnt ne of those cept for she did sit next to me. i wish i had me a redneck g/f

I'd settle for a neckless girlfriend!
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:16 PM
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i gotta find me one! hey redneck girls, single 20 yr old texan here waitin fer you!
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:24 PM
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Re: Redneck Girls and Trucks

Quote:
Originally posted by 2Bowers

*A redneck girl does not need a step to get into your truck, no matter how high it is. She knows you will give her a boost if she wants one. If she's wearing a skirt she expects you to look up it, she will wear sexy undies (or none at all) just for that reason.

Good image!!! Makes me think of springtime ...
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:25 PM
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I gotta get out more.

It makes made me think of a solar eclipse.
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:28 PM
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:29 PM
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(Other Bower)
Hey Vanhecht, I've been admiring your avatar. I have Evanescence in the player all the time. Amazing voice.

Wait, you live in Texas and can't find a redneck girl? Wow....

gotta think of a texas redneck girl-ism now...
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:32 PM
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i am transplanted at the behest of the government to california right now.....no redneck girls out here far as i can tell, only uppity gold diggers(not to stereotype)
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Old 10-30-2003, 08:34 PM
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wezol5484 wezol5484 is offline
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"I'd settle for a neckless g/f"

HAHAHA greatnessm, id settle for that too.
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Old 10-30-2003, 10:01 PM
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*A redneck girl will encourage you to "take the shortcut" through the nearest muddy field. She will take you to the Monster Truck Show for your birthday too, if you're really nice that week.

*A redneck girl doesn't care if your truck smells like dead fish. She may complain if you don't have an extra fishing pole for her in the back, though.

*A redneck girl won't hang her purse on your gun rack. Most redneck girls don't carry purses anyway; everything they need is in their hip pocket or your glove box.

*A redneck girl won't ask for directions either. She will read the map and give you directions like "back yonder" and "thataway."
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Old 10-30-2003, 10:27 PM
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Aaaawwwwwww - stop.

What is your hubby going to think when he gets up tomorrow morning and there are 35 Ford trucks parked down by the ditch and every dang one of the drivers is standin on the porch with a hamhock sized hand full of flowers from your flower bed?


Last edited by ctfuzzy; 10-30-2003 at 10:29 PM.
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Old 10-30-2003, 10:31 PM
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I can see it now; he'll probably just shake his head and think to himself: "Damn. She's done been on that computer again."
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Old 10-30-2003, 10:31 PM
 
 
 
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