↓ ↓ TPBM ↓ ↓ So, he thinks of a new plan, he will sell large bags of stale, moldy Cheerios as a bagel seed scam?

 

↓ ↓ TPBM .....is up most of the night rearranging the furniture and cleaning the floors. Is now wearing very dark shades. Never again he says, TGIF.

 

↓ ↓ TPBM ....I started my new job at the pharmacy this morning and this guy comes up to the window.
“I’ve got a blocked nose, a sore throat and my head feels like it’s going to explode,” he says,
“Have you got anything?” “No, I feel fine.”

 

ya only want to make a living syndrome;

The church manager agrees. Business isn’t going well for the painter so he decides to save some money by adding water to thin the paint. He gets a few days in and a massive storm appears out of nowhere with lightning and thunder crashing around him. A booming voice comes from the clouds, “How dare you steal from my church”. The painter screams out, “Lord I’m so sorry, what can I do to save myself?”. The booming voice responds, “Repaint, repaint and thin no more!”

 

Guy drives past a sign by the road. Says, "Sisters of Mercy ***** house."
Guy follows the signs ever couple of miles to the sisters of Mercy Convent.
Knocks at the Door and Sister Elaine welcomes him in and shows him all
the available Sisters. Guy choses Sister Diane and is led to a door.
Sister Elaine says $200 so Guy givers her $20's. The door opens and
Guy walks thru, thus seeing a sign that says, "U just got screwed!"

 

I am passing this on to you because it definitely works and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Pauline, you too can find inner peace.

Dr Pauline proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a

bottle of Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a bottle of Kahlua, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the

cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates and the rest of my half-gallon of Blue Bell Original Vanilla Bean ice-cream.


You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now. Please pass this on to those whom you think might be in need of inner peace.

 

 

Have a great day!

 

She never left us, just over there!

 

Can I help a girl out?

 

Guy, "My grandfather knew the exact day of the year that he was going to die.

It was the right year too. Not only that, but he knew what time he would die that day,
and he was right about that, too.”

2nd Guy: “Wow, that's Incredible. How did he know all of that?”

Guy: “A judge told him.”

 

TPBM. So she’s been told its Labor Day weekend. So. She asks herself where are the Contractions?

 

PBM. So, Guy orders a dozen Solar yard lights that look like burning flames. In a couple of days he walks around the yard at 9 PM and sees they are working. He’s up all night and none of those suckers made til. He thinks he needs better batteries! His Neighbor says join the club.

 

Lil Johnny now has become our favorite known scientist is positioned to become the renowned Frog authority.
So, he puts his Frog to the table many times and says, "Jump Frog Jump."
He records the distances. Lil Johnny then cuts off a rear leg and says, "Jump Frog Jump!" Records distances.
Lil Johnny then cuts off another rear leg and says, "Jump frog, jump." Records the distances.
He then cuts off a front leg and says, "jump frog jump," records distances.
His final experiment includes cutting off the last Frog leg and saying, "Jump Frog Jump!
Lil Johnnys final entrant in his journal, "Frog is Deaf."