ya gotta use your imagination , and fill in the blank word ." your as coordinated as a monkey f------ a football son !" my grandpa sager referring to my ability to trip over air bubbles . aint got no better with age , but i have used that saying since then and a few others he used i really cant repeat ..........

 

No good deed goes unpunished !
Yea I can fix it,and if not I'll screw up so bad no on can

 

Looks like another San Diego "Rural Citizen" (Redneck)
There's a few of us - I work in Santee-tucky.

 

Pitch a tent over it and call it a circus ! T/M

 

Movie Snazzy Sayings:

"Are you sure it isn't time for a more colorful metaphor" - Leonard Nimoy, Star Trek 4,The Voyage Home.

"Well, into each life a little rain must fall" - John Wayne, The Flying Leathernecks.

"Dad Burned Youngin's ya got NO RESPECT" - Walter Brennen - The Real McCoys

Ah my wife and I all we do is argue - sex and money, sex and money...SHE'S CHARGIN' ME WAY TOO MUCH" Rodney Dangerfield.

"There goes the Neighborhood." Harry Ceasar - The Longest Yard.

"I picked a bad day to quit drinking." Lloyd Bridges, Airplane!

"....Face it, you f****d up, you trusted us." Tim Matheson, Animal House.

 

On the plains of hesitation bleach the bones of countless millions who at the peak of success sat down to rest and resting died.

- Horace Mann

 

"If at first you don't succeed... screw it and have a beer!"

 

"The bitterness of poor quality will remain long after the sweetness of low price has been forgotten"

"I can't hear what you are saying, your actions are speaking to loud"

 

I am so confused I don't know whether to wind my a$$ or scratch my watch.

Life's a bitch, then you marry one. (Any wonder why I am single?)

Never trust something that bleeds for a week and doesn't die.

From the great white north:
Beats a kick in the a$$ with a frozen mukluk.

That snow is a$$ deep to a tall indian.

It's colder than a 2$ hookers heart at midnight.

It's colder than a polar bears pud in a snow bank.

 

W.C. Fields - "it ain't a fit night out for man nor beast."
My Dad- "Never start what you can't finish, if you can't finish it you've should not have started it!"
"to many Chiefs not enough Indians,"
" its like oil -n- water...just won't mix."

 

what about uglier than a bulldog lickin sh&* off a hot stove or dumb as a sack of hammers or the oxy moron military intelligence

 

As Frank Sinatra said “I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.”

 

Shaking like a dog trying to ***** peach seeds - courtesy of my late uncle Grady

 

Your an accident looking for a place to happen
Your a piece of s__t
That's a load of crap
Screwed the pooch (NASA)
Over the hump (WWII)
Fugley (F__k__ ugley
FUBAR (F__K up beyond all recognition) WWII
SNAFU (Sitation normal, all f__ked up) WWII

 

Slicker than a minnow's di k----------He's so nervous he's shaking so bad he can thread a sewing machine and the sewing machine is running.