I'm lookin' for new ideas for my voicemail. Funny ones
Currently it's
"The president is not available at this time
please leave your name, phone number, name of the country you would like invaded, and the secret password."
-matt

 

I heard one that said

"Hi, you've reached so and so, you can leave a message, or you can leave a message in detail. Think about it."

He wasn't well liked.

 

A friend of mine had one that said....

Hello you have reached ___________
I'm either at work or thinking about doing some work
So if you would like to leave a message that I won't pay attention too, you may.
Or you can leave a number that I will probally not call back at the beep............


BEEP

 

I've got a generic one.

 

A lady friend got tired of the the "GENERIC" response of her answering machine, So she recorded this,,,,
" YOU ALREADY KNOW WHO THIS IS,,, SO YOU KNOW THE DRILL,,,AND DON'T BORE ME!"
Her husband is a carpenter who she gave him a new 24 volt Dewalt drill for Christmas 2005!

 

My buddy has one:

"Hey.... Hey What's up man?.... Oh that's cool... Nah just messin with you, this is my voicemail, leave one"

The first "hey" comes through and 90% of all people go "Hey man" then the "Hey what's up?" the person calling does the "Oh not too much"... "Oh that's cool" etc.

It's a riot to listen to some of the messages.

 

I don't think I get it?

a buddy of mine's voicemail goes like

"This is Will, it's 2006 you know how these things work"

I already gave him greif that's it's now 2007.
-matt

 

A buddy of mine has one similar to this, it goes "Hey.... HA!!! FOOLED YOU!!!, leave a message after the beep."

 

My brother and some family members fell for one that goes "Hello? *loud music playing* Hello..hey wait let me turn this down. -Person "ok"- "hey sorry about that" -Peson goes one to say thats alright- and the it says "anyways please leave your name number and a short messages after the beep."

 

Mine used to say- "Who are you and why do I care?". I got bored with that and changed it to a payphone recording. The one that beeps and says please deposit 25 cents. I got it here- http://www.payphone-directory.org/sounds.html

 

Mines Kinda boring but I use it mainly for work. It says
" Hi this is (my name) of ( Company name). Please leave your name, number and address. With a brief description of the problem. I will get back to you soon as possible.

 

my house phone msg is boring, my cell is " i hate you, hate this phone, but go ahead. i'm not calling back"

 

On my answering at home the recording is, in a normal voice, "Hello...(5 second pause)...We're not home right now, please leave a message...".

Everyone is fooled. My wife's good friend called the other day and thought I actually answered the phone but didn't want to talk to her and thought I was pretending to be an answerig machine so I didn't have to talk to her. When my wife called her back, she had a difficult time convincing her that it was really the answering machine. Guess I know where I stand with her anyway. Going to be loads of fun next time we're over there

 

"Hello. This answering machine is on 24/7 for security purposes. Please leave a message and we'll call you back. Thank you."

 

I believe the message with the the word detail is actually meant to be said as "leave the message in de... tail". took me a second or three to figure that one out.

I have the generic saying as well. A very attractive sounding woman asking for the caller to leave a message. I was inclined to leave it because it made people think i was a ladies man, but it's getting old and I'm looking for a good replacement.

My cousin has a pirate message that demands a message or threatens a plank walk.

My other cousin asks for a message but only asks for a callback number if the caller is female and attractive.

Another cousin simply starts singing Rubber Ducky with no mention of a message or callback number.

I could go on and on but you get the general idea.