Ok, I am 21, my gal is 18, we have been dating for over 2 years, we are 2 years 9 months apart, we originally started dating over 3 yers ago, I was 17 she 14, I was a senoir she a freshman, soon to be 15.

Her younger sister, a 14 and feshman, like she was...(she jsut turned 14 July 4th) Now has a B/F he is a senoir, as I was, but over a year older than I was at that time, he is 18 and has been since before she turned 14.

What does everyone think of this? Is she to young to have a B/F 4 years older, does it not matter, should she be at least 18 or so before dating someone 4 years older, I mean, hat is everyone's outtake?

As far as my Gal's younger sibs go, I am more like her sister's older brother, and her much younger brother's, uncle/real older brother role....

I know some of the stuff me and my gal did when she was a freshman, but I was only 17, technically, it was still legal......whereas the sister, well, if her and her B/F do anything like what we did, that owould be illegal....

And lastly what should I do in this matter? talk to my gal's parents? Talk to her sister, talk to the B/F?

 

In most states, there is a limitation as to the age of the younger partner in a relationship, if either is below the age of 18. Obviously, sexual contact between a 14 year old and an 18 year old is illegal, classified as statutory rape. However, if the couple are chaperoned when in a situation that sexual contact could take place, a charge of implied statutory rape could not be instigated.

I do not envy you in this situation, anything you say could cause problems. If you suspect that the boy is likely to be like most other boys on the planet, and the girl will be receptive, you should maybe try to stop that, as not every 14 year old girl is emotionally able to deal with that sort of relationship. I know they all think they can, but my experience as a friendly priest suggests otherwise.

If there is to be no sexual contact, which is possible, the relationship may grow into a life long thing, or peter out into a forgotten experience very soon.

I would speak with all of the family and interested parties, but then that is what folk expect me to do.. I am unsure what you should do, but something needs saying to the couple, to make them know that the guy could get 5 years for being alone with her, in a circumstance where contact could occur.

Theo

 

My birthday is in 2 weeks, and I will be 18, and my girl is 15, birthday in like march. We're not the type to be involved in "those kinds of situations", so I highly doubt any of "those kinds of claims" would ever come about. Try to get to know the guy a little better, and maybe go from there. believe it or not, some people have relationships with honest intentions, however, some sadly do not. That is quite an age difference though, and I suspect that she might like him because he is older, and can drive his car (if hes a bowtie-****, get rid of him quick, dont need those things reproducing), and she gets a self esteem boost from an older guy being interested in her. This may sound harsh, but if the guy cant find anyone his own age, it might be because they have cought on to him. But who knows, he might be a good kid.

 

I thought *Group dates* were the in thing these days?

In this day & age,I support group dating until they turn 18.

 

They are, dennis. all of our dates have to be, as mandated by her folks, and for good reason. My kids are gonna double date.

 

Well guys, thanks for the inputs, I guess I will have to talk to this guy and see what he is like....I mean, even if he has the best of intentions...well wehn the opurtunity provides itself..Imean. Me and my gal have the best of intentions, have evry intention of gettting married, having a nice little house and a few kids...I want 3 she wants 1...if any anyways....it used to be whenever the opurtunity presented itself, well you know...

And I know that her parents do not have a serious problem, or I know that when they walked in to my gals room while I was there and we were in the middle of it...her mom did nothing but say stay safe. Granted we were dating for a year, and her mom new we were serious...

I do not want anything...unneeded to happen here. and I do not know if her sister will be able to make the right decision..

 

Holy crap, I didn't start dating until I was 18. I would never date any girl under 17 anyway. Maturity is a big issue here, and there is no such thing as a mature 14 year old. This has bad written all over it. It's also not your responsibility, but subtle hints to her parents won't be hurting anything.

 

I feel it is part my responsibility, for one, the parents do not seem to always take the right course in this. COME ON Her mom walked in on us, and did not care!!! I have been more or less part of this family for over 2 years, longer actually but....I jsut do not want to see things go wrong, as they obviously will.

 

Jimmy, sounds like the parents don't care (most guys would like that up here). I know that you are trying to do the right thing here and maybe prevent something bad from happening, thats fine by me - but do it right. An 18 and a 14 year old dating sounds like a lawsuit to me (not to mention 14 year old girls are so immature - how can he stand that?!) Try talking discreetly to the parents, bring up the fact there could be legal implications.

 

Well, like most of you know, I am in the military, the fact that I was 18 when we started dating again, and she was 116 was illegal for me. I was illegal all the way up through this last April when she turned 18.....so the whole legal side will not work well, they know I woulda been in major trouble, and from what I understand, this 18 tear old ain't that mature at all. I have yet to meet him, should meet him this week sometime.

 

Well then, meet him. If he is the kind of guy who likes to take advantage of people, then consult the parents. Too bad the legal issue wouldn't have worked...

 

I'd beat him stupid and then ask the questions, finally not caring what his answers are, tell him to scatter.

 

HAHA, Matt I heard you were leaving us, I sure am gonna miss you come back if you can.

 

I'll try and stop by once in a while.

 

So much for being subtle...