1. Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed on how to use it shortly.
2. Stay home the two days of the year it snows. Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean Southerners can.
3. If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in the cab of a four-wheel pick-up with a 12-pack of beer and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.
4. You can ask Southerners for directions, but unless you already know the positions of key hills, trees and rocks, you're better off trying to find it yourself.
5. Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.
6. Get used to hearing, "You ain't from around here, are you?"
7. Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone. They don't understand you, either.
8. The first Southern expression to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective; big ol, as in; "big ol truck"; or; "big ol boy".
9. As you are cursing the person driving 15 mph in a 55-mph zone, directly in the middle of the road, remember: ALL Southern folks learned to drive on a John Deere, and this is the proper speed and lane position for that vehicle.
10. If you hear a Southerner exclaim, Hey, y'all, watch this! Stay out of his way. These could be the last words he will ever say, or worse still, that you will ever hear.
11. Most Southerners do not use turn signals; they ignore those who do. In fact, if you see a signal blinking on a car with a Southern license plate, you may rest assured that it was already turned on when the car was purchased.
12. If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let alone eating.
13. The wardrobe you always brought out in September can wait until December.
14. If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the most minuscule accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It does not matter if you need anything from the store. It is just something you're supposed to do.
15. Satellite dishes are very popular in the South. When you purchase one, it is positioned directly in front of the house. This is logical, bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the house, and should, therefore, be prominently displayed.
16. Be advised that in the South, "He needed killin'!" is a valid defense.
17. Just because you've lived down here for a while don't expect to be called "Southern" .... after all, if your cat had kittens in an un-used oven you wouldn't refer to them bisquits, would you?

 

I'm not sure "UNITIED WE STAND" would work for me knowing what I just read. Bacon grease is great for frying potatoes thou.

 

Sounds like ALL Y`ALL are missing out on something!! Y`aint ever ben down here `fore?? Den des allways dat good `ole cajun food , me-sha!!! Com on down sha, an git you somma dat good `ole gater meat!!!


`82 F-250 Custom** 4x4 ** 351W ** 39.5--15x16.5** SS- TSL`s ** 6" Lift ** Granny 4-speed**** If you can`t run with the BIG DOGS , stay on the porch!!!

 

Don' care how yall do it up thar Bo!

 

Nah yaws zis gittin'it!

Loved these. I'm proud to be from the South. But I make fun of it myself, and can certainly laugh when others do.

#14 and #16 were my favorites. So true, so true.....


Chuck

 

18. Don't assume Southerners are stupid, ignorant and beneath you --- this is the reason why "damn yankee" is considered one word in the South and why we wished you'd leave.

 

I don't mind a little humor aimed at us southerners, but your number 5 is not entirely correct.

I was born in the south in 1944, actually a few miles south of Alabama.
I lived there until 1966 when the Vietnam event caused me to enter the US Army.

Y'all is, as you would naturally think, a contraction of "you all". Neither I nor any of my family members or classmates or fellow church attenders (that includes most of the people I knew) used the word "Y'all" when refering to one person. It just didn't (and still doesn't) seem natural to call a group of people "you". So, in the South where things are usually laid-back, it is easier to distinquish between the subject of your address by contracting you all into y'all.

I think some northerners got confused on what y'all meant, and started using it in the singular, causing the native southerners to get a bad wrap about it. (When I was dating my wife, I never said "I love y'all").

On ocasion, you may overhear one southerner talking to another and say something like "y'all come on over", which means, "you and your family come visit us". I suppose that indicates that southerners are more group oriented than self oriented - always including the family and friends in the converstaion.

One other thing - when things go south it's not an indication of something bad happening, but rather they they are going to a better place!




Winford:-) :-)

 

Alan: I distinctly recognize #17 as an old VERMONT saying. Perhaps it came from a transplanted Green Mountaineer? Other than that the only advice I could give Northerners on planning to move south is:
Stay home!

 

I spent some time in Alabama and the Florida Panhandle when on active duty in the Army in the late sixties. Anyone ever hear of Fort Rucker?

Anyway, The first thing I noticed was how friendly the local people were. I figured the locals would be sick and tired seeing GI's invading their towns and beaches, But I was wrong. I got used to people saying "Good Mornin" to a complete stranger. Something I hadn't seen since my younger days growing up in a small town in Delaware, population 300.
I think it's a cultural thing. Southerners are taught to be polite, and I think, for the most part, those of us up North aren't.
Maybe it's the faster pace up here, or the fact that so many of us Yankees come from the city, where people don't get to know one another.
Anyway, I enjoy the Southern people, love the warm climate, and hope it never changes!


Bru

2002 F150 Super Crew
Black 4X4 Lariat
5.4 Engine Ford Chrome Bars
Ford Bedliner

1979 Bronco 351M 75K orig.

 

Bru, thank you very much!

Every time I talk to my family about how I can tell that a person was raised somewhere other than the South, I get accused of being prejudiced. But your comments have reinforced my theory.

Not to give the wrong idea, I have several friends who fit that description, but I can detect by personality differences, that they were not taught the Southern Hospitality that I was.

In 1969, I finished my military service in New Jersey. That was the first truly "foreign" place that my wife and I lived, as mentioned before, having been born and raised in the South. We were quite perplexed when we would, as our natural habit was, greet everyone we met in the grocery store, and they would scowl at us and move away like we smelled bad, or were about to mug them, or some such.



Winford

 

my advice to northerns moving south would be stay home. visit when you want spend your money, but by all means go back up north. we don't need anymore carpet baggers. hahah

 

Nah, on second thought, keep your money... and stay home!!! He He He!!!

`82 F-250 Custom** 4x4 ** 351W ** 39.5--15x16.5** SS- TSL`s ** 6" Lift ** Granny 4-speed**** If you can`t run with the BIG DOGS , stay on the porch!!!

 

>"damn yankee"


Hey Ken does that have to do with them winning the World Series all the time? If it is I with you there! I hate baseball anyway. They still selling uncooked peanuts along side the country roads yet? I must admit some of the greatest sky lines are not NYC but along the edge of the Blue Ridge Mountains. About 10 years ago we made the trip to that stupid Mouse House and on the way back I had the chance to meet my idol at the time anyway. Awesome Bill from Dawsonville. Stopped and visited his shop there in Dawsonville. And then wound our way north along the mountains. I could handle living there.

 

>They still selling uncooked peanuts along
>side the country roads yet?

Actually, they do sell peanuts in the rural areas... Raw? No. Boiled? Yes. :-)

 

mmmmm Boiled peanuts i remember them in Va when i was there i used to stop every chance i got.



Wiz

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