12 Rough, Tough and Ugly Trucks
Ugly but Still Getting the Job Done
July 20th is officially Ugly Truck Day for some reason, and there are contests in various places around the country. Some trucks are born ugly, and you just can't imagine what the designers were thinking, like the 2nd generation Toyota Tundra. Some trucks are actually great, except for an ugly paint job, like the factory metallic pink Ford pickups of the 1990s. Then there are the trucks that start out great and become ugly from normal wear and tear, plus neglect and weather (like the dump truck in the picture). Finally, there are the trucks that owners have gone out of their way to make ugly, either through poor taste, poor skills, poor choices, or simply because they like ugly trucks. Ugly trucks are becoming something like "rat rods" to the truck hobby, with people ruining a perfectly good truck because they want to impress people with how hard they use their truck and how ugly it is. Click through and we'll look at some of the latest ugly trucks to pop up on the internet.
1. Grey Alien Cab Over Ford
There is a certain pug or bulldog so-ugly-they're-cuteness to cab over engine (COE) trucks from back in the day. This particular 1951 truck may one day be pug-ish again, but at the moment, the patina it has attained makes it look like Roger, the alien from American Dad. From the factory, most trucks of this era were not just homely, by slow as well, being stuck with the flathead V-8 with about three years before the Y-block came along. It certainly seems durable though, 65 years from when it rolled out of the factory.
2. Orange Colored Banana Shaped Pickup
Have you got a late 1960s or early 70s Ford F-150 that has suffered an accident so bad it no longer drives straight down the road? Well, just pack in four of your best friends, some snacks and beverages, and head to Columbus, Ohio's WCOL Country Ugly Truck Parade. It is hard to imagine what happened to this truck to bend it like this. It appears to have been both rear-ended and T-boned at the same time. At least someone replaced that rusty front fender with a freshly primered one.
3. Ford Ghost Town Wrecker
Who can say what happened here? It appears the site was abandoned right in the middle of a stock car race. At least it appears this 1940s truck managed to stay in service until the 1960s, when the 1950s sedan it is hooked to were commonly seen tearing up the stock car tracks. Perhaps the ghosts of county fairground dirt track drivers still haunt the place?
4. Ford 1 Ton Old Timer
It is hard to fault this old timer, as ugly as it is. This hauler appears to still be in working order from the more modern tires that still hold air. A truck this old still hauling the goods reminds one of an old stevedore or longshoreman who is way past his prime, but refuses to retire. This truck was made for work, and retiring it just seems cruel.
5. Stakes and Stacks
This ugly 1960s stakebed still seems to be hard at work as well. Good thing that brush guard is up front there, or who knows how bad it would actually look by now. The twin exhaust stacks really are the crowning touch on this ugly workhorse. The timber parking brakes under the wheels are a good, field expedient repair to keep it from rolling away.
6. Such Nice, Decorative, Iron Work
It is easy to understand how a dump truck from the late 1960s like this one could get so beat in normal service. What is a bit harder to fathom is who made such a nice wrought iron guard for the front grill? Someone must have just been bored at the shop one afternoon and started playing with the welder and the torch. Who can say why it needed round eye holes for the headlights. The central scroll work not only keeps brush out of the grill, but it lets all the other guys at the construction site know how much someone loves this truck.
7. Ford Humongous Rules the Wasteland
This truck is kind of cheating, seeing as how it was made specifically to look like what folks will be driving around the wasteland after the fall of civilization. Of course, you all recognize this as a vehicle the bad guys drove in Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior, and if you don't recognize it, you need to go back and watch the movie. It is hard to tell if this is an actual left over from the original filming or someone's replica, but from various pictures, this appears to be real. It wears its ugly like a badge of honor, having gotten those scars from the actual stunts in the movie.
8. Ugly in Black and White
This truck is ugly, but it is honest, and the rust doesn't even look all that bad. I would pop for a new windshield and drive this, no question. Someone already appears to have lowered it and put on some reasonable modern wheels and tires. Now you just need a few Strombergs, a Thunderbird Y-block supercharger, and a set of headers to let it breath. With a proper hopped up Y-block, this truck would not only look mean and ugly, it would sound that way too.
9. Abominable Bus
This bus was found on the internet, but where it was photographed has been lost to time. The outside is ugly, but the interior is abysmal. There may not actually be any Ford under that 7th generation F-series nose, since it doesn't appear to fit well, if at all. Would you take this bus to Norja? Wherever that is.
10. Out of Many, One
Like the motto of our country, this truck looks like it has been made one from several other trucks. This truck manages to be ugly without falling into the trap of the intentionally ugly trucks. You have to imagine the gray and blue truck got into an accident, damaging both the front and the bed. While the red truck had a tree fall on the cab. The red cab door appears to be from a 2nd red truck with more trim, and a slightly different color paint. The rusty homemade stacks are the final ugly detail. Still, there is almost nothing you can do to one of these early extended cab trucks to make me not want it.
11. Ford F150 Wing Ding Edition
You occasionally see trucks like this on the road, and unfortunately there is no 12-step program for stick on plastic bodywork addiction. What bothers me most about this truck, and others like it, is that the bed is now totally useless. There is a brush guard on the front, but obviously this is a truck that is never going off-road, based on the wheel and tire choice. It would be interesting to see what this triplane truck actually looks like in a wind tunnel. Maybe all the hours and millions of dollars Ford engineers spent have been helped by a couple hundred dollars worth of spoilers? Probably not.
12. Ranger on a Mustang
Once upon a time Ford made Ranchero pickup trucks on the Falcon/Mustang chassis, and I guess some people still wish they did. This appears to be an ordinary extended cab Ford Ranger, with 1994 SN95 Ford Mustang body work awkwardly slapped on it. With the hard cover on the bed, this probably isn't ever used as a truck anymore, and even with the extended cab, this has a smaller back seat than a real Mustang. Most of the other trucks may have raised the question of how, or when, but this one only asks why.
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For information on maintenance and repairs, check out our do-it-yourself technical articles at Ford-Trucks.com/how-tos/.