DODGE
Dad Owns Dinky God-awful Elf
Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Dangerous On Days Gears Engage
Dead Old Dog Going East
Dead On Dad's Garage Elevator
Dead On Day Guarantee Expires
Dead On Delivery, Gasoline Eater
Dead On Delivery, Go Easy
Dead On Delivery, Guarantee Expired
Dead Or Dying Garbage Emitter
Dear Old Dad's Garage Experiment
Death Overcomes Driver's Generous Ego
Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere
Department Of Defense's Grossest Error
Designers Occasionally Do Good Engineering
Detroit's Only Damn Good Engine
Digs Own Damn Grave Eventually
Do Or Die, Get Engine
Don't Over Drive Gutless Engine
Dorky Outside - Damn Good Engines
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Driven Only During Grey Evenings

GMC

Garage Man's Companion
Garage Mechanics Companion
Gas Mileage Crappy
Gay Man's Chariot
General Mass of Crap
Generally Made Crappy
Generally Mediocre Cars
Generic Made Chevrolet
Generic Made Chevy
Generic Mutilated Crap
German Milk Cow
Get More Cash
Get More Chicks
Gets Mechanics Crazy
Girlfriend's Mothers Car
Gloomy Mechanical Contraption
God Must Cry!
God's Master Creation
God's Mechanical Curse
Goober Makes Cars
Good Many Clunkers
Good Mechanics Cry
Good Mileage Consistently
Goofy Mangled Creation
Got a Mechanic Coming
Got More Crap
Gotta Mechanic Coming?
Great Motor Car
Great Mountain Climber
Great Muscle Cars
Grungy Mound of Crap

CHEVY

Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Can Hear Every Valve Rattle Over Loud Engine Tapping
Can't Help Every Valve Rattles Or Leaks Every Time!
Car Has Extensive Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips
Car Has Extensive Valve Rattle, Or Loud Engine Ticks
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Cheap Hastily Engineered Vehicle Running On Luck Every Time
Cheap Hazardous Expensive Vehicle Runs On Luck Every Time
Cheap Heaps Erratically Vibrate Running On Level Even Terrain
Clutch Hangs, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time.
Constantly Having Every Vehicle Recalled Over Lousy Engineering Techniques
Cracked Heads, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time
Cracked Heads, Every Valve's Rotten, Oil Leaks Every Time
Crap Heap Enormously Vunerable Runs On Luck Every Time
Crappy Hot-Running Engines, Very Rusted Out, Lose Every Time

CAMARO

Calling All Mechanics - Another Required Overhaul
Can A Mechanic Actually Repair One??
Can't America Make A Real One?
Crapped Another Motor, Another Rear Obliterated
Crappy American Machine Always Requires Oil

MOPAR

Made Of Plastic And Rubber
Made Of Plastic And Rust
Many Odd Parts Arranged Randomly
Massively OverPowered And Respected
Masters Or Performance and Racing
Miscellaneous Oddball Parts Assembled Ridiculously
Mitsubishi's Over Priced American Replicars
More Overall Performance And Reliability
More Overall Power And Reliability
Most Often Passed At Races
Most Often Proven At the Racetrack
Most OverPowered And Respected
MOst Perfect Automobiles for Racing
Mostly Obsolete Parts Assembled Randomly
Mostly Old Paint And Rust
Mostly Old Parts And Rust
Mounds Of Power And Revs
Move Over, Pentastar Approaching Rapidly
Move Over People Are Racing
Move Over Plymouth Approaching Rapidly
Move Over Plymouths Are Racing
Move Over Pontiac Approaching Rapidly
My Old Pig Ain't Running
My Old Pig Always Roars
My Old Plymouth Ain't Runnin.
My Only Problems Are Repairs

My favorate is:

Move Out People Are Racing