I need yall's opinion on this one, please

[Gottaford]

I'm not petty, I swear ... but, I am feeling a bit odd about something and I'm wondering if I'm being petty. Here's the deal. I take a big bucket of candy to the Volunteer Firefighters (and also the Sheriff's) every week as a little 'thank you' for all that they do. Now I don't mind their kids eating some of this stuff too but it bothered me when along with stuffing their faces they were also stuffing their pockets to eat it later. And the parents just sat their watching them do it. I was tempted to suggest that they save some for the Firefighters, as I would have done with my own child under the same circumstances, but I held my tongue instead. The bucket was nearly empty by the time I left and I had only stayed an hour. If I wasn't on a fixed income and candy wasn't so expensive I'd just blow it off, but ... well, am I being petty that this bothered me, and what, if anything, would you do?

[85e150six4mtod]

I'd stop taking them candy.

[tseekins]

Originally Posted by Gottaford

I'm not petty, I swear ... but, I am feeling a bit odd about something and I'm wondering if I'm being petty. Here's the deal.

I take a big bucket of candy to the Volunteer Firefighters (and also the Sheriff's) every week as a little 'thank you' for all that they do. Now I don't mind their kids eating some of this stuff too but it bothered me when along with stuffing their faces they were also stuffing their pockets to eat it later. And the parents just sat their watching them do it. I was tempted to suggest that they save some for the Firefighters, as I would have done with my own child under the same circumstances, but I held my tongue instead. The bucket was nearly empty by the time I left and I had only stayed an hour. If I wasn't on a fixed income and candy wasn't so expensive I'd just blow it off, but ... well, am I being petty that this bothered me, and what, if anything, would you do?

I hear ya! My daughter plays travel softball and we take a bag of candy for the girls and a sheet cake or brownies for the parents to every tournament. Needless to say the same thing was happening to us.

We solved the candy problem by purchasing candy from the dollar store. If there's no candy at all, then dollar store candy is great.

Tim

[powerstroke72]

Well first of all Michelle, that's a very nice and selfless act. It's one of those random acts of kindness that speaks volumes about who you are and I'm sure they appreciate you for it.

That said, it's a sad commentary on the state of our country nowadays. If I had tried to do something like that, my dad would have stopped me dead in my tracks and I'd have left with empty pockets. Too many parents just let their kids do whatever they want now. Stop taking the candy and treats down there for a while and see if they ask why. If they do, then it opens the door for you to say something about it without you feeling petty about it. If they don't ask, maybe it was unappreciated to start with and you could use your money somewhere else where it would directly benefit you more.

[BIGKEN]

Michelle...it's a nice thing you do...but...kids will be kids. Obviously you can't blame them for stuffing their pockets...that's on the parents. Perhaps a little sign..."One per person"...along with less candy would work.

[helifixer]

Wow Michelle I applaud you! having worked many years in the EMS field I know what it is like to have someone like you who shows unselfish love for others. In this situation I would have to agree with John (powerstroke72) maybe just don't bring any for a while and let them bring up the conversation and gently let them know your feelings. I would hate to see you not give these kind gifts to some of those who greatly deserve them.
May God bless you for your kindness.

[FarmForward]

You have a good heart, Michelle.

Maybe instead of candy, you could take something that is'nt as easy to pocket as candy is? Bake some cookies or make some fudge. And maybe instead of going every week, go every other week, or even less. Or instead of taking them treats, maybe you can volunteer a couple hours a week in the office, or give a small donation.

[horsepuller]

I don't think you are being petty about it. It would bother me too. The parent's missed an opportunity to teach their kids that just because something is free you needn't become greedy.

If you still feel like taking snacks to the fire hall and sherrif's, then maybe something with a little more adult taste would be better. Like raisins or peanuts.

[Gottaford]

Thanks everyone for your opinions, advice and kudo's. I guess my feeling was right. But I don't want to quit on them. Maybe for a little while as was suggested but not until I give them my Dad's car now that he's passed on ... so they can practice using the jaws of life on it, and maybe even burn it later.

I do add raisins, pecans, peanutbutter crackers and even a bag or two of microwave popcorn. But mostly all different kinds of candy. The crew of Paramedic's that stays there are welcomed to it as well. For the Sheriff's I give things that they can take in their cars to snack on when they are sitting with radar or miss lunch and need a little pick me up.... like, individually wrapped packages of raisins, peanuts, several different kinds of snack cakes, granola bars, low fat cookies, peanut butter crackers, small bags of chips, etc., and pop corn when they have their monthly meeting. They don't seem to go for the really healthy stuff, but I try to slip some in there just in case someone likes it. I don't bake anything, but I do take peaches, tomatoes, and zucchini that I grow in the summer time.

Again, thanks for all your words. They sure made me feel better.

[b-uno]

take a bowl full of that chocolate exlax and that should cure um.

[hanklin]

Dont do that^^^^^^^you would get collateral damage and that would be all bad

[miller_feed]

We have a bucket of gum, candy, suckers, on our counter in our store. We always ask the parents of the kids that come in if they can have a treat. Most kids will pick one item but there are some that will start filling their pockets with the treats. I don't mind telling the kids that they can have one treat each, in order to have enough for the other kids that come in. Some kids are so bad at this, I move the bucket behind the counter when I see them coming in and ask them what kind they want. Then I hand them 1 each. lol. The parents giggle while the kid is filling their pockets, and won't say a thing untill I say something first.

[bpounds]

I'm not sure I understand the situation - why were there kids at the firestation or sheriffs station? Was this an open house period? Was it the firefighters kids taking the candy?

If you give something to the firefighters, and they give it to their own kids, why would that offend you? If it's an open house kind of thing, and random kids are wandering around, then I can see your point.

It's a mighty nice thing you do, and I'm sure the firefighters appreciate the gesture more than actually eating the candy.

[Gottaford]

Originally Posted by bpounds

I'm not sure I understand the situation - why were there kids at the firestation or sheriffs station? Was this an open house period? Was it the firefighters kids taking the candy?

If you give something to the firefighters, and they give it to their own kids, why would that offend you? If it's an open house kind of thing, and random kids are wandering around, then I can see your point.

It's a mighty nice thing you do, and I'm sure the firefighters appreciate the gesture more than actually eating the candy.

I have seen only two kids at the Sheriff's office when they were taken out of school one day because of the flu outbreak. I don't think their father had any other choice but to bring them that day, and I don't think he would have allowed them to pocket all the goodies for he seemed quite strict about their actions.

The Fire station out here is a bit different from the ones in town that house the paid Firefighters. The Volunteers can bring in their kids if they want to, so it doesn't offend me when they give their kids some of the candy. My dilemma was about just one family letting their kids take most of it to eat at home leaving nil for the others. I was feeling sorta resentful ... or, better put, it's that I was feeling sad for the others that weren't there at the time to get any of it. And they definitely like eating it, in fact ... each one has their favorite selection and I try my best to make sure they get what they like. To see their eyes light up when I bring in the bucket and the way they plow through it to find their treasures is like watching kids on Christmas morning. These people are always at the ready to be on duty at a moments notice, come rain or shine, day or night ... for free. They do a lot of other things in the community as well, so, be able to give them a little something that makes them smile just tickles me plum to death. But what I do is for them all ... not just for one family. I hope I explained it better this time.

[bpounds]

I think I understand better now. Basically it was one family, or one small group of kids, that was taking advantage of your generosity. I would probably try to time my visits when those particular little were not there.