need advice plz

[conman3300]

ok well i have a problem and thought i could get some feedback we really don't know each other all that well but good enough to know if you like each other so theres this girl that im starting to like alot and we talk alot and i thought things were going great but one day i find out from a friend that she doesn't feel the same. so i said ok no biggie i asked her why cause i wanted to know and she said there was no chemistry. i thought that was weird because about a week before finding this out we were texting and i asked her what she was doing and she said"o nothing im just with my boyfriend"i said "cool am i bothering you"she said"no"so we talk for about 20 more min and she then tells me "i really don't have a boyfriend i just wanted to see how you would react"so you know i took this as she kinda liked me but i guess not but wait this story gets harder to figure out well since she told me she didn't like me as more than a friend she wouldn't talk to me as much in person so one day i asked her why and she really couldn't give me a straight answer and said she was thinking and the bell rang for class and she left.so about an hr later i get a long text saying "im sorry for the way iv been acting i don't mean to its just the way it comes out and i like you as a friend blah blah"so im like thats cool can we at least become better friends she says yes so i ask her"do you think there will ever be a shot me being more than a friend"she says she honestly doesn't know.so i say"basically theres a chance then and if we get to know each other more then i can try again" she says"ya if im not talking to anyone then ya" so i say"dang that sucks for me because im sure you have guys all over you because you are extremely pretty"she says "aw thanks but trust me its not like that at all"so i say "sure blah blah" so we keep talking and one of my close friends told me she said she would be happy when we'd talk but said she was scared of havening a bf and i asked her about that but she said she wasn't scared. and we would text alot for awhile but then she wont text back for about two to three days but when she does we talk for a few hours i am so confused right now this is so hard for me to even think about i mean im falling for this girl hard theres just something about her that every time i see her im speechless and if im in a bad mood she makes it better it seems like i have a shot right? and any help on how to approach this situation or anything i can do and super sorry for it being so long i just needed to get this down and tell someone so any help at all would greatly appreciated thanks alot again

[385seriesHemi]

Don't ask if you have a chance to be more than a friend if there is a definite possibility of being good or even great friends. Worry about the dating later down the road. As for the texting, I dont do it. I would rather talk on the phone or in person way more frequantly whenever possible. As you build the friendship you will understand eachother more in different situations. If she feels she can trust you when she has a horrible day or somebody aggrivates her to an extent you can be there to talk to her and LISTENING is different from HEARING so LISTEN to her. If she doesn't talk to you for a few days, so what, she must be busy. Everyone has a couple things going on. Don't let tempers get in the way either (hers or yours - she may get pissed at you or "vent" on you because she might be already mad but dont get mad from that just let her vent if it were to happen- its part of the relationship thing at times) keep yours under control. But dont treat her like a baby, she probably can take care of herself. Support her when needed also. So just relax and let things roll the way they roll. Hope something happens eventually. Good luck.

[BradyCouchman]

Originally Posted by conman3300

the bell rang for class and she left.

that is the problem

everyone i talk to about dating i tell this to, DO NOT DATE IN HIGH SCHOOL

just be friends and hang out and get to know eachother, if you enjoy that then stick with it. if you date almost all the time you will break up and then not talk much after that if at all and you will lose her completely. both of you are young and just learning how to deal with these new emotions you are having. just relax and enjoy being young.

i never talk to any of my (the few of them) ex GF from high school.
but the few GF i had in college i still talk to many of then to this day....(only a few years have gone by)

there is no reason to put all that presure on you when you dont need that...

[conman3300]

thanks guys for the advice

i think im going to get to know her more and see where it goes and ya i agree don't date in high school

all i really want is someone i can spend time with and talk to and i think she is perfect so im going to see where this all goes to and hope for the best

ill keep you guys updated with this story might be awhile but yall will no how it goes

thanks agin

[cipsmithers]

Definatly just do the friend thing. Got this advise from a hunting buddy:
When in high school, make friends. Not saying don't date. Just make sure you make friends. Because later on down the road, that girl you like may need a friend and you will be there. Then she will say, man, what a nice guy. He just spent 4 hours of his time listening to me ramble on about how horrible my day went, how badly this relationship ended, whatever. But she will see how nice of a guy you are and maybe give you another shot some day. Or, she will say, man what a nice friend i have, and move on. Either way you have that friend. Girls may come and go, but true friends are forever.

I used that advise not so long ago in abbreviated fashion, and i got me a new girlyfriend!
Like stated in previous posts, listening is everything. Don't just nod yer head every once in a while and agree

[Blue Bomber]

i say stick to being a good friend. cant go wrong.

[21411]

keep it cool man, friendship is better than most things. EX. my softmore year high school i had a simmilar delima. my buddies sister, him and the folks were both going for me but she said she knows me too well so thats cool and were still friends btw there may have even been a little action there too.

don't be afraid to wrap an arm around her.

[Caleb1]

How old are both of you? im almost 22 and i went through the same crap and i learned that at that age we arell just kids and dont know what the hell we want! so i decided to back off and let God bring the right girl into my life.

[highboy87]

take it from me... don't even think about getting involved with someone in high school.. i dated a girl for three years. ruined my senior year. and then she ended up running off with my best friend. find a girl that makes you a better person. that's what i've finally got now and i've never been happier. don't look. when it's supposed to happen it will happen.

[megawatt00]

Everyone herehas given you some great advice. Speaking from experience (I'm 42) Enjoy your high school years. Don't get committed in a "long term relationship" You are better off being the best of friends. If in a few years thing progress further than great. I know a few people that married their high shool love and today they are not together. You have to experience the world. If you get tied up to early in life you alwayshave the what if's in your head.

Continue to talk to her as friends. Nothing wrong with having a friend of the opposite sex.

[cman1120]

Absolutely. I'm in HS and while having a girlfriend is nice, every single one of them don't like me much, and never talk. My last one was my best friend for like 3 years and had a major crush on me and so we decided to go out. It ended in absolute disaster. Girls are just another thing to worry about in high school, when you have enough on your plate already. Plus they take up valuable money that could be spent on your truck. Ain't a thing wrong with having a friend who is a girl.

[parkland]

Originally Posted by conman3300

ok well i have a problem and thought i could get some feedback

we really don't know each other all that well but good enough to know if you like each other

so theres this girl that im starting to like alot and we talk alot and i thought things were going great but one day i find out from a friend that she doesn't feel the same. so i said ok no biggie i asked her why cause i wanted to know and she said there was no chemistry. i thought that was weird because about a week before finding this out we were texting and i asked her what she was doing and she said"o nothing im just with my boyfriend"i said "cool am i bothering you"she said"no"so we talk for about 20 more min and she then tells me "i really don't have a boyfriend i just wanted to see how you would react"so you know i took this as she kinda liked me but i guess not but wait this story gets harder to figure out well since she told me she didn't like me as more than a friend she wouldn't talk to me as much in person so one day i asked her why and she really couldn't give me a straight answer and said she was thinking and the bell rang for class and she left.so about an hr later i get a long text saying "im sorry for the way iv been acting i don't mean to its just the way it comes out and i like you as a friend blah blah"so im like thats cool can we at least become better friends she says yes so i ask her"do you think there will ever be a shot me being more than a friend"she says she honestly doesn't know.so i say"basically theres a chance then and if we get to know each other more then i can try again" she says"ya if im not talking to anyone then ya" so i say"dang that sucks for me because im sure you have guys all over you because you are extremely pretty"she says "aw thanks but trust me its not like that at all"so i say "sure blah blah" so we keep talking
and one of my close friends told me she said she would be happy when we'd talk but said she was scared of havening a bf and i asked her about that but she said she wasn't scared.

and we would text alot for awhile but then she wont text back for about two to three days but when she does we talk for a few hours

i am so confused right now this is so hard for me to even think about i mean im falling for this girl hard theres just something about her that every time i see her im speechless and if im in a bad mood she makes it better


it seems like i have a shot right?

and any help on how to approach this situation or anything i can do

and super sorry for it being so long i just needed to get this down and tell someone so any help at all would greatly appreciated

thanks alot again

I have been in a situation you describe, only harder.

The best thing you could do is put some distance, see what she thinks of that.
There was this girl once, and I wanted here more than anything, but we were best friends, and it was terrible.

I moved away, didn't talk top her for at least 6 months, and when I went back to town, "scored", ........

From there there was a an option on the table, but I almost didn't feel the same anymore, it was more in my mind, than reality.

Sometimes it's possible for you to feel like you;re drowning, when your feet haven't even touched the water yet.

Thats when it's time for you to step back, and put yourself out with a high pressure fire extinguisher.

I speak from experience, spent almost 2 years chasing this chick.... imagine my disappoint when I get to taste the punch and realise I like a different flavour altogether.

Put some distance..... if she likes you as a friend, OR ..., she'll stay in touch.

[BradyCouchman]

Ummmmmm this was 4 years ago he might be married by now.....just sayin

[parkland]

Originally Posted by BradyCouchman

Ummmmmm this was 4 years ago he might be married by now.....just sayin

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

No chit,

well played.

Now don't I look as smart as a pack of broken soda crackers.