Would you try to convince your own kid to join?
#1
Would you try to convince your own kid to join?
In light of Polarbear's thread about his own son joining the army, I started thnking about my son, who turns 18 in a couple of weeks. Of course, he wants to go to college, and I'm all for it, but the truth is, I just can't afford to send him. I ant him to follow in my footsteps and go into the navy and find something he'll love to do. I also explained to him the benefits of tuition assistance and the GI Bill. I told him that if he got stationed in Norfolk, that he would always have a place to live- that isn't on a ship . (He lives in Alabama now, with his mother and step-father). The fact that he wants to go to college makes me proud, but, the truth is, his mother and I didn't plan for this, and there is no way I can foot the bill for him. Besides, he has his heart set on going to Alabama (the University). Figure about $20 grand/ year (conservative figure) for that school. Anyway, I'm gently pushing him toward a military career. Is this a bad idea? It's been very good to me, and he's got a good head on his shoulders- doesn't drink or smoke, works a steady job, and scored pretty well on the ACT (no SAT, as of yet).
#2
Not a bad idea. I plan on making my kids aware of the opportunities in the military as well when it comes time for them to make that decision. There's also a LOT to be said for being able to get through college and not be in debt. You might also consider suggesting he find a job that has tuition assistance (I think Home Depot offers this). I worked part time for US Sprint as a phone operator (unskilled labor) and got tuition assistance. Takes a little longer to complete but not having to look at half a house payment when you're trying to establish yourself is a good thing too.
#3
Not a bad idea to let him know the options. I am just asking, not trying to flame. How motivated is he to go to Alabama? Is he motivated enough to figure out to pay for it himself? Why are you paying for it? If he is not motivated enough to pay for it himself (scholarships, work study, tuition reimbursement etc) then does he really want to go for the education or for the social aspect? $20k/yr for a social experience is pretty steep.
Like I said, not trying to create an argument, but something to think about. A college education he works for himself mught be a better education. Mine was.
Like I said, not trying to create an argument, but something to think about. A college education he works for himself mught be a better education. Mine was.
#5
Well, I already told him I could not afford Bama. If he finds a way to do it himself, great. I'll help him with some of his living expenses, of course. He is looking into some loans and grants. I also told him to think about the Community college. It's waaaay cheaper and he can live at home and keep his current job, too.
-besides all that, I still want him to join the navy, for selfish reasons. (It would make his mother- don't get me started on her- really mad... )
-besides all that, I still want him to join the navy, for selfish reasons. (It would make his mother- don't get me started on her- really mad... )
#6
#7
There is always the discount way to the big degree.
1. Figure out what degree you want
2. Find out what credits will be accepted as transfer
3. Take those classes at the community college
4. Finish up at the big school and walk away with the big school degree.
Once you have the degree, prospective employers don't care where you took freshman English. I know a guy who got a couple of degrees from Harvard that way.
1. Figure out what degree you want
2. Find out what credits will be accepted as transfer
3. Take those classes at the community college
4. Finish up at the big school and walk away with the big school degree.
Once you have the degree, prospective employers don't care where you took freshman English. I know a guy who got a couple of degrees from Harvard that way.
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#8
I don't know.
I've enjoyed the results of what the Navy gave me.
But my kids are still small, and the situation may not be the same when they get old enough to join. I have friends still in, and they tell me I'm the lucky one for being out. I realize alot of the aggravating things going on now, happened when I was in. And its simply old guys grousing about the 'kids' these days, when we did the same stupid stuff.
I've enjoyed the results of what the Navy gave me.
But my kids are still small, and the situation may not be the same when they get old enough to join. I have friends still in, and they tell me I'm the lucky one for being out. I realize alot of the aggravating things going on now, happened when I was in. And its simply old guys grousing about the 'kids' these days, when we did the same stupid stuff.
#9
Stu 37d check into the Navy Reserve for your area this would give him a good taste of the navy and he could roll over the the Active side and after 20 years have a retirement. I was a career councelor for the Navy Reserve for several different units in michigan. I enjoyed it (24 years) traveled a lot in the reserves. Promotions in the reserves is harder than active especially from E5 on up, depending on rate. I was an Operations Specialist.
#10
I have never understood the whole, if you get divorced you are responsible to pay for your kids and their education until l they are 21 or graduated thing! My parents stayed married (tho we wished they'd get divorce long and often) and at 18 they could kick us out, and WE WERE responsible for OUR education. Maybe it depends on your state, but he is going to have to learn to pay his own bills sometime.
#11
Since I am an active duty sailor, and work for the recruiting district in Richmond, I have my reservations about the reserves... (LOL). I really want to steer him away from the Guard, as he thinks he won't have to go overseas with a rifle. I would encourage him to do it if that's what he wanted, but I think the benefits are more readily available in the active component, and he would get more serious experience, in addition to the training. Reservists don't get the schools (usually) and don't get to travel to all those wonderfully exotic places (unless they get activated, then they get to 'see' those ports, they just don't get to leave the ship. "Look, there's Spain... sure wish we could go see it.")
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Nobody has said I have to pay for his education. I want to help, and I wish I had set it up for him when he was a child. Now, I am just looking at alternatives for him to help himself. BTW, he does pay his own bills.
I have never understood the whole, if you get divorced you are responsible to pay for your kids and their education until l they are 21 or graduated thing! Maybe it depends on your state, but he is going to have to learn to pay his own bills sometime
Nobody has said I have to pay for his education. I want to help, and I wish I had set it up for him when he was a child. Now, I am just looking at alternatives for him to help himself. BTW, he does pay his own bills.
Last edited by stu37d; 11-15-2005 at 12:06 PM.
#12
"Gently pushing". You should be very proud that your son sees the value of higher education (I'm sure you are). I had two children in college at the same time. It was tough, but they were determined and their persistence has been greatly rewarded. I suggest you support his ambition to the fullest extent you can and stop pushing (however gently) him away from a good decision.
Dono
Dono
#14
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