I'd either call a car that's beige and all stock "old fart" since I've heard when you get over 50 you start to turn beige and become boring.
My apologies if anyone get's offended.
I call mine "El Kabong" from the old cartoons because I bought it from a mexican who preceded to do the autozone makeover with neon underglow and an awful rattlecan job, along with 8 or so random switches that do nothing when you flip them.
well the Sand cruiser is gonna be it as I have a bad habit of kicking in the 4x4 and off roading around here (have some sandy areas) with it LOL!! tho the sandy pigeon cruiser would be another fitting name as Ive already hit 3 pigeons with it and one got nailed in the grill but no harm done and the bird cleaned off easy...and yes we have parts of our city where they nest and gather (near the river under the Kennedy bridge)
lol i hit a hering with a chevy caprice once and a pigeon with a cavalier when i was a kid my cousin had a Ford Bronco like mine and he hit a duck he was going so fast that the duck broke the damn grill LOL he stayed in the shatterd parts of the grill we got home i jumped out and was like "RICKY!!!"